The American John K. came to me now, I honestly confessed to him that I wrote a story about him yesterday, should be released in today’s issue. But it is not too late to recall if he is against. John agreed with the publication, but strictly corrected that the temperature in the settlement Free on the day of his arrival was only -46, and not at all -47, as I imagined there. And that this is far from the funniest story of all that happened to him.
of Russia. I was a little offended and asked him to tell the most funny story he thought. Here is she.

At the end of the 1990s, one cute girl from the deaf taiga arrived.
Transsibya somewhere in the area of Transbaykalya in order to sit on the train going to Vladivostok. The driver of the approaching train explained to her that there were no free seats except one in the double-seat luxury. But that a decent girl in this couch is better not to sit down. “What’s wrong with this box? The girl asked scaredly. “There is a dirty foreigner. Terrible such, huge, unridden, unwashed, crazy probably.” Further, from the words of the conductor, it came out that it was a dirty foreigner in all respects: "I was trying to pull me into the toilet with myself. Then the guy did not let out of the toilet, he wanted to break in there. He shakes his hands, shakes something, he doesn’t understand Russian. My eyes are so hungry, so ugly. No one passed by the toilet. Until I talked well with him. Do not go to him in the box! »

The girl had to go. And she went all the way to that terrible foreigner. To his happiness, she spoke English.
The foreigner, indeed a huge unbarred man, polently stood up, almost pushing her back out of the coupe, greeted her, complainingly pointed to his scarf, his dirty shirt, and said with a breath: "Sorry! No water!
»
Why is there no water? The girl wondered, “What about the toilet? “Would I be there! All the cranes checked, all the pins overturned - there is no water! I myself see people going to the toilet with their towels across their shoulders, returning from there shaved and clean. I tried to ask what was going on, and everyone was scared. »

Was the pipe pushed from below? The girl asked.
What kind of pimple?! to

I also found out why the American eyes are so hungry.
His credit card was not accepted by the restaurant car. The Siberian semi-stations were also not fixed by rows of ATMs. He was driving with
of St Petersburg. The man is gentle, the prices in the restaurant are bite, all the cash he wiped with appetite even before the Baikal. At large stations in search of a bankomat to be removed feared - how much will the train stand, ask no one.

After a minute, passengers watched with interest how the door of the evil car opened. A courageous girl suddenly led the humbled stranger through the corridor, and behind them both the toilet door clogged.

One hour later, the terrible alien, in the world American professor, doctor of biological sciences, specialist in project management, hero of Antarctic polar expeditions John McClin Crum was washed, shaved, dressed in a fresh shirt, fed, all shining and kindly communicated with neighbors on the wagon through an interpreter. What was the reason for his previous ugly behavior, he did not explain to the passengers. The whole car looked at the girl with admiration, as if she were a great abuser of foreigners. So is
John Crum has met his future wife. Strange phrase “Did you press the
Pimpochka from the down? It became their family tradition.