About fishing and fishing

Throwing stones into the water, look at the circles formed by them; otherwise, such throwing would be an empty fun.
(Style of Prutkov)

Although at the table almost nobody knew anyone, but everyone quickly met and unnoticedly switched to "you".
Many guests came from far away, one even from Sakhalin.
The occasion was the most noble - the eighty-five-year-old grandmother, and at the same time the new home.
Among others, a couple stood out: he was a healthy and funny artillery captain, she was a sweet-looking slender with an excessively large stomach. So huge, as if it was time for her to give birth six months ago, but she did not attend courses and does not know how it is done, and the belly-dog, everything grows...
The woman sang "Dark Night", weep and the grandmother began to ask her grandson:
- Valerich, tell me, not everyone has heard how you met Irishka. I like this story very much.
Irina smiled, smooked her stomach, listened to him as they listened to the dubious wheel on the piston and spoke:
- Let me tell you - in short, Valera already got the prescription and so he urgently needed me, so he picked up full pockets of money and walked around the city, seduced, sought me. Do you know what a frog?
The Captain:
- Wait, you are not telling everything like that, or people will think... Let's do better I. I'm like a jump in the streak of four courses to sing for glory - I've wrapped up all the men's dorms of the city, and here the distribution rolls in the eyes...
Irene sincerely surprised:
Why the men?
Would you like to hear that these were women’s dormitories?
Well, that is, yes at all...
What am I? So, all of my classmates have long since married and have been waiting peacefully to be sent to the army. How can I go without my wife? A tube at all.
The Holocausts there get very quickly a morrow either from lieutenants for wives, or from colonels for daughters. The third is not given. For the local population, hope is weak - not everywhere there is a population.
The captain stumbled upon the dark woman and continued:
But most importantly, I had to find love to the grave so that I could have someone to die with one day.
Irina flowered and kissed her husband. Go to the Internet? It’s late and it makes no sense. I needed not just a wife, but a good and decent. How do you know it in two days?
I thought, I thought and I invented. He dressed in civica and began to wander around the city in search of a beautiful beginning. I see nothing like that.

and IRA:
Was it me?
You are what? A kind of frog. I walk from behind, sharply overtaking, breaking three steps forward and unnoticedly turning on the music on my cell phone, as if I were being called.
I carelessly pick up the phone from the back pocket of the jeans and knock into it, like - I am late, but soon I will and add a step, but the main hint occurs at the moment of pulling out the phone. As if by accident, my cell phone is scratched out of my pocket and a five-thousand paper is dropped. And that, you agree, is a great temptation.
And with my back I heard this frog slow down and silently suck my money, I didn’t even turn my head, I went on. Do I have such a wife?
The second and third time the net also came with a seaweed, I was already desperate, and the money was running out, suddenly I see a girl of incredible beauty. Well, I think, even if he picked up and took my note, let it. I will not let go and get married.
Irma smiled inspecting her stomach:
Did you really think so?
The word of the officer. Well so here. I catch the pissing phone, throw the next five thousand and instantly hear the angel’s voice – Hey, Ale! You are losing money!
I spoke, thanked and invited him to the cafe.

and IRA:
It was a beerbar. So we met, two days later he left, and then I flew to him.
Well, what an asshole, did not regret 20,000 rubles to find me, a real hussar and Ira twisted his husband with non-existent beards.
The guests smiled and digested this highly romantic story of great love, and Irina resolutely grabbed her stomach and carried it from the altar to the house.
The captain did not reduce the affectionate look from his wife and when she had already gone quite far, suddenly jumped sharply, leaned over the table and not losing sight of the door to the house, conspiracy whispered addressing everyone:
In general, it was money only for appearance, in fact – it is a discount coupons from the electronics store. I didn’t want to talk to her, she would be offended. And by the way - Ira was probably the thirtyth one I tested for seamlessness and the only one who passed the test...