I don’t understand my boyfriend. He has three favorite things: me, the car and the dog. When the car is all dirty, he is ready to lick it with his tongue and condemns: "Oh, you are my child." When his creature is cheated by a dog, the eggs of other dogs are laid, he kisses her and lets his nose be licked. But when I am all pure and beautiful, I approach him and kiss him, he says, "Go and grind your lips in a mask."