bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 63 - ]
 16.10.2013
The war was struck by a child. But the commander of the shuttle in Khabarovsk, where Vasya served for three years, disappeared as a spy throughout Europe. (Who saw the Khabarovsky stadium - Vasya participated in its construction). Vase got a good car - a Studebaker with full drive on all three axes and a swing. For its high permeability, the car used the love of the senior officers and officers of the unit as a transport for fishing, hunting and similar excursions.

That day Vasya took a sergeant with an officer to fishing. On the way back, they were stopped by a patrol. The commander's father was unable to speak. The tube to separate their fan from Basin’s clean breath was not yet invented. They smashed everyone on their lips, along with the car. Vasa threw his documents into the gap in the door covering purely of value.

The night in the cell, Vasya, accustomed to the burdens of military service, slept as a baby. I was worried in the morning. Worried about the car. It was autumn and the frosts already started to catch up. Yesterday evening, Vasyu was pushed into the camera, not especially entangled in his request to "fuse..." Water should be drained from the radiator. Now the water could freeze and threaten the engine. Vasya did not think about whether he would be punished or not. Watson thought of the engine. He raised the noise. And achieved his - he was released to the car to heat the engine.

The motor crashed, Vasya sat in the cabin and stared sadly at the closed door. The door to the territory of the lips was directly in front of him, through the courtyard. And here they opened up. The gates were opened and a half-fourth duty entered the territory. The watchman approached the driver and they began to talk. Right in front of Vas was opened the Freedom gate.

Vasya then could not explain why he did it. The devil is the only explanation. Grip - speed - gas... and Vasya is free, heading to his native part. Behind him there was somewhere far away half Tuesday, but we remember, "Studer's motor is three!". They noticed a familiar car and opened the door. The student flew into the territory, slightly rushed to his legitimate place, Vasya shot out of the car and disappeared in the bunkers of the unit. To the already blocked gates flew a half-torch, from which the angry Head of Lips jumped out.

The commander of the hauptwacht is afraid of everything. As they say, “Don’t give up.” But not an intelligence frontman. After hearing the Chief of the Lip asking for the immediate return of the prey, Vasin the commander said to him the following: "Why are you attached to me? Those are your soldiers, deal with them! And I will reward my soldier for not leaving himself in captivity and for not dropping his weapons. You are free!!”

“You, the commander is calling you.” All, there was nowhere to run further and Vasya plunged in front of his eyes.
- Why did you, the soldier, flee and the officer left? Commander Vassili began to troll.
They are separate from me, yes.
Okay well. I joke and I will. The Senior! Gather the soldier! Once he was sentenced to 10 days in jail, he must go!

When the officer and Vasey approached the gate, the window of the commander's office opened:
“Sir, where did you get the news?
How, Comrade Colonel, on the mouth. You ordered it yourself.
I said 10 days of arrest, not on the lip! He will be eaten there without salt, and I need a soldier alive and healthy. So so - to release the capper of the shoemaker, the prisoner there and put the clock!

For the next ten days, Vasya had eaten and slept. As the most "unfortunate" cook laid him the most delicious cakes. The senior was puzzled, went to the commander and asked to stop this ridicule - the work crashed, the car stood, people laughed. But the commander was firm: “If I don’t answer for my words, what kind of commander am I!”
– – – – –
Now Vasily Alexandrovich 76 and he is building a house. He says, “I will not die until I have completed.” There is still work there! I believe him.
Source: http://www.anekdot.ru/an/an1310/o131014.html#1
Eng

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna