By the will of fate I live in Germany and sent once to my wife (who lived in Russia at the time) a package. I put a envelope with a postcard inside. Well, I remembered the Urals and signed on the envelope "Do not open in any case!!!". And inside "oh you are a ugly pig, because it is written no!". And what do you think? A package came to his wife, opened, and there the letter was scattered.

I would give a lot to see the eyes of the customsman at that uncomfortable moment.