No one there talks so much about sex as 18-year-old virgins!

Mom asked to buy a cat food, walk, comes a text message with the following content:
"Pets and Dogs"
I answered:
"That’s the case. You are "n"
Again the SMS:
"Coursework"

Son 4 years. He sits with a worrying sight under the tree. In the hands of the head of Santa Claus, the grandfather himself rolls. Dad, and what he grimmed there, he asks and shakes his head off (when he ripped off seemed pieces of plastic got inside and really grimmed. I am talking brain. He shakes his head and sadly asks why I’m not grimping.

I love you like fish love water.
She: I suspect that fish do not like water. It’s just like saying "How a man loves air". He doesn’t like it and takes it as an honor. Without him he would die.
Ohso wrote that if you pull a fish to the shore, it will understand how dear its sea, and it will be a completely different fish. The analogy is beautiful, but the fact is that a fish has only one minute of memory. In a minute, it will also be the simplest fish that does not pay attention to the sea.
Here is.
And now you can say "Let’s be quiet. I couldn’t say "I love you too very much!"..Mm...might) I love you too very much.

The greatest lie of the 21st century: I’ll call you back in 5 minutes. :D

I never thought that I would come to visit one of the guys I knew to have passionate, unrestricted, nothing-binding, sex, and instead 3 hours I will LIKE PELLMANY with all his family... I can't understand who used it))

Examination at Jurfake. Prepod walks through the audience, simultaneously looking at the answers:
“Violence is both physical and intellectual... Oh, and weapons mean we have cold and hot!

I study in courses. Second day of training. Unknown to each other. And the group is not all going. In the middle of the couple comes a secretary and informs the lecturer about the missing student "Called Tsoy he in the military committee";
A man sitting next to him raised his hands and shouted "Tooy is alive!!! He is in the army!"

I: There on TV are showing exhibitions of spells. The magician puts his assistant on the sword, then on the spear.
He: Come tomorrow :) I’ll show you the focus :)))

Let’s share our secrets.
YYYYYYYYYYY :)
XXX: I am a fool.

It is said that girls love guitarists. Their fingers are trained.
Do you think the pitchball is worse than the guitarist? and ;)

The day of fire:
In fact, the field is pressed out of the condenser like oil from a sandwich... You want to eat, right?

I went to the water park with my wife...drived, jumped...we stood wet...I ask her...Well how? It just lacks sand in the ass...to be like the sea.

On January 1, I decided to congratulate my old acquaintance with the new year, for 2 years they did not communicate and my number changed.
10:16 am: Happy New Year, Lapushka! be beautiful loved and happy!
10:20 thank you! and you with New Year, puppet!
17:30 she: So, I fell asleep and trembled.

How did you know that you are God?
I prayed and realized that I was talking to myself.
(Government of Havre)

xhx: sent a message in contact: I received a number and
Send this message to all your friends! When you collect 8 digits, it will be the id number in your fate contact!
Okay, let’s see how strong people are. I gathered all 8 numbers, I entered, and I hit the page of my acquaintances, they wrapped it on their dog (!)
The fuck is simple (

- and also to study with me a girl who seriously believes that the last president of the USSR was Nikita Mikhalkov.
But the most frightening thing is that when she said this in a couple, only two people laughed.
I am a predator.

In the pharmacy (morning 7 jan)
Boy: - Girl, can you watt and manganese?
I too, only two bands and a mango.
The next girl in line: You won’t believe it.

Today at the bar:
At the neighboring table, two girls eat salads there, pizza all kinds, two bead-types trample nearby and look straight to eat the girls. After a while one can’t stand, stands up, approaches the girls and says, “You’ve eaten so much! Maybe for a week, right? Can we meet you?"

My wife and mom are a crazy Twitter. They remember everything I whispered when I was drunk.