It was not worth the older group of kindergarten at reading to ask what words they knew on the letter "X".
They know "bread", "fridge" and "hernia".
Epic Fail managed to avoid, but what moment when you are waiting for an answer...

Fans of bingo will understand:
XX: Yesterday my husband decided to show his son's friends how to shoot his stunned calash, put a cardboard box in front of the kitchen door and amused it shot. At the same time, I heard a timid question from a child, will the door not hurt? No of course. My husband said, it won’t break the box. As a result, in my kitchen door a flat row of 8 holes

Tomorrow I’ll fuck you all day.
My husband : Me? For what? I am untouchable!!! to

Commentary on the status of the SSC. The network:
“The men! Choose one thing: either love women or understand them.
Don’t philosophize, just fuck it.

Is this a car salon?
and yes!
I would like to sign up for a crash test!? to
–...

I love American movies.
xxx: say "a city surrounded by an inaccessible wall"
xxxh: and show a two-meter fence from a rabbit grid

We come with a friend to his home, on the threshold we are welcomed by his two-year-old son with cries "appa! Which is". I say to him, "Sasha, we need to say "Papa", not "Apa". To what my friend answers: "You are a naive man, he asks for iPad"

Babka Ejka (15:08:35 30/01/2012)
A woman is a strange bird, she goes up in the morning like a rabbit, she works like a child all day and goes to bed late like a swallow, she must whirl like a goat and shine like a hot bird, remaining for other men a rabbit in the sky, and for her blue in her hands.

Jekyll (15:09:45 30/01/2012)
Like a plywood!

Jekyll (15:10:11 30/01/2012)
A cat for a neighbor.

Jekyll (15:10:36 30/01/2012)
Wedding for Husband's Friends

Babka Ejka (15:10:49 30/01/2012)

Jekyll (15:11:04 30/01/2012)
Cucumbers for Grandma

Jekyll (15:11:57 30/01/2012)
Gazelle for shops

Jekyll (15:12:40 30/01/2012)
Damn for the Sister.

Jekyll (15:15:25 30/01/2012)
An eagle for himself.

xxx: signing a contract with the alpha-bank, she cut her finger with paper. Do I think I should be careful?

XHH: From the forum on lump in love novels:

S. Robbins "Unknown under a whale"
His member stumbled into the jungle between his legs, found a way and struck.
This is a terrible picture: Crazy
YYY: Maybe there is a real jungle there.
YYY: Maybe there is a fauna there already.
YYY and Flora
YYY: and its greenpeace that prohibits cutting forests

I was very sick with angina. She was alone at home, couldn’t even get out of bed and cried from helplessness. My dog, Kyara, sat next to the bed and looked at me with anxiety. Then she left and returned with a huge stinking muzzled bone: she was apparently hidden from her for a black day. Kyara laid her bone on her pillow and pushed her nose to my face – “Bite!”and c)

XHH: Guy, and if the conversation with a girl is about that in jeans it will be uncomfortable to rape her, it's okay, what do you think?
Tagged: normal
What about zoophilia, the Prince of Wales and the birth of the spider?
What is Annika?
HH: And who else?! to

I work in a hypermarket, every night outdated products are taken to the garbage, where they are greedy in fights dismantled by the local inhabitants. A buyer approaches me, it is clear that he has plenty of money, and asks how much time the outdated products are thrown out. I am shocked to tell him that at 7 p.m. they are taken away. He turns and leaves. I wait 7 hours to find out what these products are for him. I go out on the street, near this place is a BMW X6, and in it is the same buyer. It turned out that he decided to show his son that if he did not study, he would have to collect food from the garbage! and :)

"Lucing" is called The Budget Option "Shopping"

C Habrabr (of MegaUpload):

Venna
FBI agents did not confiscate the servers and hard drives, but only copied part of the data from them.
No expectation and no speed limit. and :)

I have a violin, you have a camera... let’s go!

I once thought I was the smartest. Now I know for sure, I am not the only fool.
Joseph of Egypt

I came to the Sambo section by chance. In the 1960s, every student had to pass the GTO (Ready to Work and Defense) standards. Each exercise in this complex was evaluated by points, and for the norm of GTO it was necessary to score a certain number of points. One of these exercises was toughening on the tournament. My weight was 50 kilograms. So I didn’t make the impression of a “Powerful Man.” Of course, then, when my stomach grew and my mouth spread wide, everything stood in its place, and then on.
I didn’t pull the man.

At the first class in physical culture, I passed the entire norm of GTO, pulling in.
100 times. Then our coach advised me to go to the Sambo section instead of physical training. I decided to try and stay there.

At the end of the first course within the institute there were sambo competitions among the first-class students, and I took the first place in the lightest weight. Later, I was invited to the team of the Sambo Institute, where in this weight was already a master of sports. I was practically taken into the collection as a beating bag.
Master of Sport is also a master in Africa.

True, if the first time he just beat me, then in a year I learned to oppose him, although I still always lost. I was a bag to beat for a whole year, and then the situation changed drastically. My Master became ill with polio, and I became the only fighter in the lightest weight (in the common language, a mucha, or a fighter in the weight of a fly).

I, a novice, began to be put out for competition, and I quickly began to win. I don’t think it’s just that I’ve been holding on.
Master, and also in the fact that my opponents did not respect me. When the reporter pronounces, "The First Division and the Novichok are fighting," then, in addition to the spectators, this First Division also hears these words.

Quite quickly I won the third division, then the second. But the first failed, as the number of wins in the first category is much higher than in the second and all wins must be raised in a certain time. During the time between sessions, I didn’t have time to do this, and in the session I generally threw the sambo, and the wins were burned.

I did not perceive Sambo as a fight, but as a game that requires a certain strategy and tactics. In addition, Sambo instilled me quite useful skills. For example, our coach taught us to sleep exactly one minute. Now I learned to do this, but then, after the heating, before the fight, I could sleep exactly a minute and go out on the carpet with completely fresh forces and heated muscles. But the practical application of sambo in my home has always been unsuccessful.

Imagine yourself. I go from the last movie session, after spending my passion, to her home. I naturally cut off the road and walk through the dark courtyard. So in this dark courtyard right in the middle is the only lamp and illuminates a circle of about five meters in diameter. There is a pair in this circle of light. A drunk man, grabbing a woman for her hair, beats her in the face with a free hand. In the light of the lamp in all directions fly splashes of blood from a broken nose.

Everything for a minute. I jump to the man, attracting his attention with a blow to his nose. Then I make the back leg, and here he is already lying on his back, knocking with his head on the asphalt. At this point, I naturally miss a woman. But literally a second later, I hear over my ear:
“Aaa... They were killed!!” An angry woman with a broken cheek is now thirsty for my blood. Of course, in short distances, she didn’t compete with me, but I still felt scattered.

One day I went home with my future wife. It was summer, so everyone was walking around in white shirts and dark pants. Upon leaving the subway "AutoZavodskaya" on my shoulder was whose palm: "A man to smoke will not be found?" I, without turning, cried out, “No!” and rushed forward.

But my hand turned me face to face. And I saw a healthy verse with a red hairi in the circle of the same friends and a hand raised to strike. I abruptly, as they taught, grabbed him for the sleeve and collar, then a sharp rush, but Versilia remained standing, with his sleeve in one hand and a shirt collar in the other.

From such a hassle, the whole company shrugged for a moment. I took advantage of this and went on a run through the Car Factory Street.
Literally in a few seconds, the entire output of the veril followed us. The one without a sleeve was the first. I also ran well on long distances. So, after running about a mile, I found that I still hold a shirt in my hands, which stimulates the runners to continue the pursuit.

I stopped, waited for the offended Versailles to run closer, threw off the shirt pieces and continued to run. All this time next to me ran my future wife - the first class of skiing. After this run.
She said, “Well, what are you doing with your sambo? Running is the solution to all problems.” We still argue on this subject, but for myself I decided clearly that Sambo is not so much a struggle, but a competition of intellectuals. True, this is impossible to explain to all the verses you encounter on your way.

Are you sure you won’t stick to me?
I will not be. I didn’t even use condoms :(
And I have :)

Title of the news: "RPC: After the sanctification of Moscow boats will become less traumatic"
Isn’t it a fucking shit?