Mom (while the text of Iliad): And you are interested in reading this?
I : of course! I cried over her!
M: Are you my daughter? T_T

We need costumers.
WOW :?? to
Oh yeah, the socks

From the vacancy:
"Fully equipped workplace:..., tea-coffee-bakeware,..."

Colleagues at work:
Removed from friends of Nike Borzov.
What is it?
But I didn’t have to congratulate me on my birthday.

Flying in front of the GIBDD camera, a notification about the fine comes by mail. I look at the photo and the head turns: a special offer from GIBDD - "photo at the rate of -300rubles"

xxx: no, it’s not that stupid (I missed other worlds))))
xxx: here, if I could run in real with a huge drill between huge mushrooms and go to bed with a shoveled on the whole teacup Sheograt, then I would need toys ?)))))))))
Yyy: Yes, our world is not perfect (((

Under the windows of a girlfriend, a man speaks in the tone from which Socrates should have started to bite his elbows from envy:
I can sleep here, in the entrance, overwhelmed. But they don’t understand me! You cannot understand that! They are all dumb!

dr.real: we had a chemistry with beautiful big breasts
Dr.real: So I hardly remember chemistry.

<xxx> VRIO of Moscow mayor Vladimir Resin today proposed to move to another place the monument to Peter the First work of Zurab Cereteli.
<yyy> in the middle of the village
<zzz> As a garden gnome?

Paradox: Living a life in difficulties is remembered the best, living in wealth is remembered the worst.

Kidok
Beginning of the 90s. My Peter's comrade Misha was going to Lviv for cheap pieces for himself and his wife. And since this is my hometown, he turned to me for advice: how and where is it better to buy?
My consultation was simple:
Buy what you want and where you want, but remember that money must be given.
Only when the goods are in your hands. All other proposed
Opportunities and circumstances are a “kick”.
Misha according to the kival, especially since he will not be able to run there for anyone - after Afghanistan, his leg does not hurt, he walks with a rod.
Misha flew to Lions.
He came back three days later and here is his story:
Walked around the bazar, appreciated, suits a touchy guy:
I can get half as cheap as here. He comes to me
A relative from Poland, he is afraid to go to the market, there are a lot of bandits and I
I help him sell everything cheaply. Let’s go to him and if you’re with him
If you buy it, I get 10 bucks.
We took a taxi and went. Another aunt from Costa Rica came with us.
We arrived at the entrance, next to it was a car with Polish numbers. The man ran after the Polish. We went out with a large bag, started with my aunt. Polish
“Happy,” the man translated.
Aunt ordered a bunch of things, such as in a bag. The Polish recorded everything in the notebook: size, quantity, color, then calculated on the calculator - $ 2340. The money forward.
Aunt: So how forward? Let’s get the goods first.
Polak: - I used to carry the goods first, and this is how it ended.
He showed a scar on his forehead.
So that – “Albo, penances, albo, goodbye...”
My aunt unwillingly counted and handed me a penny. The Polish left. After 15 minutes, I came back with two large bags. Aunt sweated from excitement, reviewed all things, pleased handed the guy 10 backs and rolled the bag on the ground - to catch a taxi.
Misha ordered leather jackets, for himself and his wife, jeans, sweaters, shoes and so on. He gave the Polish 600 backs and began to wait.
The boy also went for cigarettes.
Near the entrance Misha remained alone... Half an hour passed, a man came out of the house, sat in a Polish car and left. Everything was already understood... Staying still was stupid.
Suddenly not from the entrance, but on the other hand to Misha approach: a Polish, a guy, a taxi driver who brought them from the bazar, a couple of unknown strong boys, and what is most surprising - a aunt from Kostroma, but already without bags. Everyone’s faces are evil.
The Polish man pulled the money out of his pocket and said in purely Russian:
- Here, count again, here is exactly 600 backs, I give to witnesses. It is regrettable,
That nothing could help you...
The shattered Misha recounted the money, put it in his pocket and walked away.
Two quarters later, a little girl caught him, stretched out a paper and said:
The thick uncle sent you a note.
............................
“Good Misha.
I am so glad you survived after that...
Thank God you didn’t recognize me, I guessed you too when you were thrown away.
I was your internship at Kamaz, and it was I who took you to the hospital.
and Schindler. When you were accepted there, they thought you were not a resident. I said so in the battalion, so everyone thinks you’re dead. I am sorry. I will tell everyone that you are alive.
Don’t look for me, I’ve gone. In front of his brigade – I replied that it was burning and that I saw you in the form of menta, so you need to make a return.
Don’t worry, shrimp...

The Polish.”

I prefer black blondes rather than natural ones.
Why so?
- Let the natural dude know what she has in mind.
The painting is a declaration of intent.

Marina is a miracle secretary with a higher artistic education. She loves to tell everyone about her favorite Ancient Egypt while responding to calls. As she raises the phone, she still continues to speak, so the shrinking clients are constantly hearing something like...beast heads, hello!""...Anubis, a guide to the world of the dead, good morning!" and so on.
Today the beautiful tradition has come to an end. Today, the founder from Moscow called us and for half a minute stood in the phrase "%Firmname%, good day!"...

KrotBankrot: Russia is an amazing country. Only we have a note that is greater than the minimum wage.

I lie with a girl in bed: she is naked, I am naked with a condom in my hands, the door opens, mom goes in and says, you dress up, and I will make tea.

X: Only I have girls with a poster "I will embrace for a smile" while I embrace a wallet.

I am looking for a job, can you advise me?
The wage is unstable: yesterday 30k, today 15k.
by Fuck! 45 thousand in two days! Are you working as a manager?? to

The bird spoke, until it was discerned, was distinguished by intelligence and intelligence.

- In my friendship, they suggested that Boyarsky would be a good face of a line of condoms. And the slogan: "Defend yourself, puppy!" Or - "I will delay them, nothing!"
And for the broken condom: "From now on! One for All!"

by e_smirnov

by Diman:
We have an anti-office.
Users are sitting under Linux, admin is sitting under the screw.
by Mikler:
We need to limit admin accounts, or as if they did not do what)))