bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №37910
 26.10.2010
I talk to the Hindu on the net.
We talked about the famous people of our country.
What do you know about the famous Indians?
I don’t think about it: Mowgli.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №37909
 26.10.2010
Why look for a double meaning in words? If I say:"go on, suck@!" it doesn’t mean at all:"oh yes, continue @batt my brain!" it means:"go on, go on!and "

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №37908
 26.10.2010
Saa: After some time of work, a blue screen appears on the monitor, no inscriptions. After restarting, everything works normally. Who faced such a problem? How to solve it? Operating system W7, etc. 3G and 4G operations.

Yesterday I went to work, the car stunned. I try to start again – it starts. Who faced such a problem? How to solve it? Color blue, cast discs, I pour 92th.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №37907
 26.10.2010
My wife is going on a trip to Yaroslavl. Wear clothes of the type "strings".
Why is it that the strings
She: - To not be in the pop in the cracks...
You’re going to Yaroslavl...What happened?! to
She is: Idiot! The insult! The injury!! The clothes on the pants are not visible from the back.

You will hear this...

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №37906
 26.10.2010
X: Did you come to the census?
Y is yes. But I was not at home.
Y: But they came to all the other houses where I was that day. so I am a few now, and none of them live at home.)))

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №37905
 26.10.2010
How to remove the smell of olive oil? The car stood in a painted garage, now it smells wild and does not ventilate... >_<

YYY: I don’t even know. I, for example, because of the cat, the couch had smelled for 5 years before it was thrown out. So I think that such a smell is easier to break than to get rid of it.

XX: Yes, but the olive is also poisonous! Or do you also suggest the harmful effect of interrupting something more poisonous? )))

You can use uranium or plutonium :)

Uranus doesn't smell like O_o

So let the cat start with it :)

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №37904
 26.10.2010
Little burned - replaced in the song "lived in the grandmother" letters. in its own way. type "now on the letter U will be: two cheerful goats at the bugus..." after N substations, it seems that when replaced with C the matrix failed: two large Sisi lived at the basisi!

The process of inclination ended in general unexpectedly: "two cheerful grandfathers lived with the neighbor!"

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №37903
 26.10.2010
The SMS came from an unknown number and without a signature with the following text: "Natasha gave birth!!and "
To be happy for someone, or to worry for yourself.

[ + 74 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №37902
 26.10.2010
The theme of my mother's first diploma: "Betadecetonant complexes of metals as reagents for determining nitrogen-containing amino compounds."
And this guy can’t learn to jump off the torrents.

[ + 107 - ] Comment quote №37901
 26.10.2010
Correspondence of technicians:

<xxx> go to the counter?
<yyy> later I think of integrals.
<yyy> on order. for the money. I work out.
<xxx> Integral girlfriend
<xxx> black and white
<xxx> sales grid
<yyy> would you get to solve the mattan for off-the-box for free?
<xxx> *pride* Yes
<yyy> aaa... the highest math...
<xxx> =/

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №37900
 26.10.2010
Professionalism – a minimum of movements with full performance.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №37899
 26.10.2010
The story of the owner of the restaurant (from the first person): We sit with friends on the summer veranda, eat lunch, tremble. The restaurant is empty. The rain has just ended, such a real summer rain. The air is fresh, the clouds are gone, the sun is shining. Cappuccino and relaxation.
The roof of the veranda made of soft transparent plastic bended in places from poured rainwater. The guard is trying to pull the water off the roof. Takes the swab and the upper end of it lifts the sections of plastic and drives the water from one section to another. He is not in a hurry, he acts thoroughly – no one but us.
And here a luxurious mercer enters the restaurant, the driver jumps out of it, opens the back door. Out of the car comes an impeccable gentleman in a light linen suit. He takes a couple of steps to the entrance past the tui in pots placed along the perimeter of the veranda, and here... The guard, looking at the mrs, breaks his arm, he sharply pulls the pen of the swab, and he very unsuccessfully pushes the plastic up – and all the rainwater.
Two hundred liters are poured out on the gentlemen. The painting of Repin “Swimming”.
After a second, the gentleman with his compressed waist crashes from his place and rushes to the entrance. In a parallel course along the veranda, the guard rushes there, throwing off the swab. On the stairs they meet... and the guard, stretching his hand forward, screams "You can't come here in this form! We have a dress code!”

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №37898
 26.10.2010
Three chickens are talking.
“When I grow up, I’ll cuddle louder than everybody else,” said the first.
“When I grow up, I’ll overwhelm all the chickens in our chickens,” the second answered.
"That's what I'll tell you, brothers," said the third, "it's not a chicken farm, but a poultry farm, and with the name Broiler I would be more modest in my plans for the future.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №37897
 26.10.2010
[own.opium]: I call a friend from the traffic jamming, and I complain: "Staas, everyone looks at me in this BMW X5, as if thinking, either a gift or a father!! It is offensive!! to
[own.opium]: And he reassures me: “Well, sister... No one even thought of the father.and"

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №37896
 26.10.2010
I thought I avoided the army’s principles of organization of work. How I was wrong. The chief, entrusting the employee at least a week of tasks, achieved the words:
“I’m not demanding this today or tomorrow...but that it all be in two days.”

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №37895
 26.10.2010
I hired a 50-year-old aunt for work. I am not pleased. Married, children are grown up, no lover. What else does she do?
And the teeth?

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №37894
 26.10.2010
xxx(16:33:31 25/10/2010)
Alena gave birth 10,10,2010 at 10 p.m. in the children's clinic No10 at the address of Karpinsky 10
yyy(16:34:20 25/10/2010)
Gee
xxx16:34:31 25/10/2010)
The child is doomed to be a coder :)

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №37893
 26.10.2010
In the restaurant after dinner, the waitress brings a bill to the couple. The lady takes it, looks at it, pays from her pocket. And the man collapsed on a chair, the stomach rolled out, smoothed and theatrically said so loudly:
Oh, I finally brought my grandmother to dinner...
You are wrong, dear. I brought my grandmother to eat.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №37892
 26.10.2010
The Sister: Fuck
Sister: I am not rewritten (
I was not there when they came to us.
You can come to the spot on your own.
The sister: Nafig
Radioman: as a Nafig
Radioman: the country will not count you
Radioman: You will be cut off from citizenship and deported to Switzerland
Tagged with: urraha

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №37891
 26.10.2010
Anonymous(68004): Hi, please help, you are opening the lid of the oil-pulled garlic, the car is falling and it is swallowing... What is it and how to fight it!
– is
Anonymous(59313): Do not open the deck!
Sbtipa: Do not open the cover
Anonymous(29823): Do not open the cover

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