The client may look cute and adequate, but any little thing that attracts you in the eyes, activates your mode "What are you wearing? “” One day at a wedding meeting, the future bride was interested in my personal life: married, if children and all of the like. Until that point, the whole conversation was going on in a normal mode, so I didn’t feel the noise. He said he is married and has a child too. I even joked that you too are getting married and there can be nothing between us. That humour came to the guys. The next question is, how was your wedding? If you were a photographer, was she perfect?



I didn’t have a wedding, but it was purely formal. We came to the ZAGS, scheduled in the office, went together to a restaurant, flew out of the country. It upset our relatives, not parents, they were happy, but I didn’t think this format would upset any of my future clients. The girl began to be interested in the reason for this decision, to which I replied: "We make a huge number of weddings every year, so we saw everyone and decided to make this holiday only personal." This only stunned her and already began to believe that our decision was false. I stopped the lady by saying that my past had nothing to do with their present.



The next words made me stumble. The girl said she could not entrust the shooting of the wedding to a man who denies this sacred act. If I refused my own celebration, and even persuaded my wife to do so, then I cannot film my wedding at all. After that, she went out. The future husband of the lady humbly apologized, saying that her principles and marriage she considers a sacred act. A few years later, they asked me to remove the baptism of their child. I said I am a convinced atheist. They refused.

I had a dog, Bob. Healthy, loose like a bear, with thick black wool. The Yakutsky Love. Excellent dog, one disadvantage - without eyes, i.e. completely blind. What did not prevent him from going hunting with me and dragging shot ducks out of lakes. And the eyes dried out for a long time - when I was a puppy, one eyelid was short, and in a dream the eye was slightly opened - well, and the crown in the eye slunged while sleeping in the shade. He remained with one eye, but for a short time - a year later, in a fun dog fight with the rest of the village lovers, the second eye disappeared. It first discouraged him a little, then he got used to it and seemed not to pay attention to the darkness around him. Activated in his head a natural navigator, and perfectly performed in the complete absence of visibility "instrument navigation". Moreover, his navigator worked excellently - repeatedly noticed that on an unknown road he goes with caution only the first time, the next time he runs confidently, bypassing obstacles (sometimes already non-existent). Having stumbled upon the gates for the first time - passes under them, for the second time, for example, the gates are already opened - and he still passes through the place where the gates were last time.

Beautifully caught neighboring cats from boredom, pretending to sleep at a bowl with food, chased uninvited guests from the yard. He served his food honestly, without demanding disability discounts. He went to work with me, to the village power plant.

In the warm weather, he ran through the forest around the station, updating the map, for the remaining 9 months lying in the corner of the electrotech on the floor and listening to people's conversations. At home, he lived in a rainbow in the winter, in the summer, just outdoors or in a cone, if it rains. In the winter morning you go out into the courtyard - and from the grove in front of the entrance a whirlwind of snow, and from it - Bim, with a smile to the ears. Love is a fun dog.

Once I moved to work at another power plant - to the airport, four kilometers before it, three of them by the taiga. Well, it is necessary to cross the river in the winter, in the summer to cross by ferry or a boat. The reel there is 200 meters wide in the spill, but deep (specially deeped by the land for ships), and fast. The first work shift, went alone - Jim wandered around the village on his dog business, well. The freezer was under 40, so it came quickly, as much as sweating. I live in a new place, study the equipment, all the business. This is a diesel driver for me: did you see a joke? He calls to the window. I see - on the street of Bim by his own person, the door with a shovel stands and pushes. It opens out. I found it, a trail! So he went with me to work, indeed, I worked there for a day, two days later, so I took food with him - two or three ice cream cakes. He was very respectful of Struggle.

He lived for about 18 years, and died quietly and quietly - he was already old at all, did not eat well, slept mostly. I sat in the courtyard on the bench, smoked, stared at the river, approached Bim, shaken, placed my head on my knee, as always, I scratched him behind his ear, he breathed, lay down at his feet and stopped breathing.

The epithelium. A century lived, a century studied, and never worked.

XXX is deaf. Vanessa will never have a girlfriend. We must finally accept this.
WOW (previously covered with the cold after): What did this downside do again?
xxx: This fool read from some other mancubus that when dating a girl should: a) laugh; b) enchant with his own craving; c) enter the "non-resource state".
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???? to
XXX: He decided to unite everything. He put a red light on his eye and put on dark glasses.
WOW: Taaak...
Then in the park, he approached a girl who liked him resting on the bench, confidently wrapped her on his shoulders, took off his glasses and turned on his dirty LED!
Yyy: Oh God... I need your clothes?
XXX is ugum. She says, after this phrase, the girl’s heels flashed in front of her whisper. And now he asks me – what did he do wrong?? to

When the Holy Spirit cries:
“Rush you, live in heaven.”
I would say, “Don’t go to heaven.
Give me my country.”
by S. Esenin
The great poet really knew something.

In the mid-1990s, my husband was at a wedding. All like everyone, competitions, fun, vodka. The wedding went in its turn – hmella, the guy sitting in front of me climbed faster than the others. So it happens. He began to smite the people sitting next to him, the girls, the guys with whom he could scatter his eyes, and reacted to comments with aggression. In one word, the monkey chained.

They took him out on the street for prevention, and this ugly man pulled out the pen-pistol, the older generation probably remembers it was such in bad times, and let's scream that it will hit anyone now. In general, the pen was removed, the mouth was slightly removed and released. The wedding went well, there were no more excesses.

And in the morning, familiar mints tell how this dwarf fled to the house, took the calash with three shops and a couple of grenades. They intercepted him a kilometer from our restaurant. As I said, your documents? Take the machine out of the bag. While the store inserted the bucket, they had time to turn the fool.

And so over time more and more you realize from what heat the wedding of a hundred people jumped.

P. S is

If he was then three or four years, after sitting down, he shot two people in a couple of years.

His further fate is unknown to me.

Once we went on an excursion. In the Icarus. We were pioneers, and the excursion was to the museum, to drive a hundred kilometers. In general, we go in pioneer cravates, snow on the street, we sing songs. We did not know that this Icarus was a transformed soul-loss. He was like a crematorium on the outside, and inside he gave gas from the soul. In a clean field it started. One pioneer stumbled straight on the carpet trail between the rows of seats. There was a chain reaction. Two pioneer units began to water everything around, and each other. And it happened somehow instantly. I also felt I couldn’t stand it now.

And I remembered how during the change in school, an old warrior told us, a couple of boys washing the floor in the chemistry office for some provinces, how he survived during the war.

He was like us, 10 years old. Suddenly the Germans arrived, all who were caught were loaded into a moving shower and taken to the woods of the village. People thought they were being taken somewhere to work. No one knew what the car was. When he saw all around him asleep, he was wet of fear. There was a cloth in the pocket, it was wet. Losing consciousness, he instinctively took the cloth and pressed it to his nose. He eventually woke up in the night among a bunch of dead bodies.

In Icarus I had a jacket in my pocket. I soaked the cloth with condensate from the glass, and closed my eyes so that I couldn’t see the fountain pioneers. A few minutes later, the driver stopped and opened the door. The frosty air hit the room. Pioneers started jumping out on the street, and boiling the snow with the remains of breakfast. You can imagine what happened inside the room. Only a few are clean, and I am one of them. It is clear that we did not go to the museum, but under the curse of the driver turned and went back.

Thank you military! I don’t remember your name, but I remember how you looked at us, the hooligans with clothes in their hands, and said we’t need it. It was useful. Maybe you will also need.

xxx: I played a lot in Doom and now I work in Doom

Yyy: But you should have shot the devils, not joined them!

The boss is such a bastard that if he is not a bastard, he is not the boss.

about our medicine. My wife and I retired and bought a house in a village on the border of the Saratov and Volgograd regions. The children, granddaughter and grandchildren live in the Moscow region, the grandson in Saratov. On vacation, on vacation - all to us: the river Bear, natural food, clean air, simple good people. The village has a hospital, the building was built in 1914, water heating, high large chambers. I was born there in 1945. The hospital worked under the cursed tsarism, under the equally cursed socialism, and under the current democracy became unprofitable, they wanted to close! The hospital was closed, and the daily reception of the patients was left. Not during the day, but until noon.
Now the story itself. I visited my grandson Vanjuza in the summer. The first class is over! Riding around the village with friends on a bicycle, learned to ride without holding the steering wheel and one evening stumbled, fell, straightened his skin on his left knee around the asphalt. The mother of one of her friends, who lived near the fall site, washed her knees with hydrogen peroxide and friends and friends put Vania on a bicycle and brought her home. I bowed my knees, went to bed, and took Vania to the hospital in the morning. During the night, the bandage should be dampened to remove. The nurse brought a bottle of peroxide, poured out - not enough! But no more! The nurse tells me: Do you have a mango at home? I say there is. She is: Bring it. Another says: We can buy furacilin in the pharmacy kiosk, dilute and water, it will be faster. Bought, divorced, polished, the bandage removed. I have to wrap. What will we smash? Do you have Bipanthenes at home? I : I have. She is: Bring it. Dentist: I will bring now (living across the road from the hospital). I brought, named, bandage I bought in the pharmacy kiosk, clogged. This is what? There is nothing in the hospital for the child!!! Tell me, please, the censorship words to evaluate our medicine!
But that is not all! Literally a day ago, an optical fiber cable was taken to our hospital! We will be treated online. There are no medicines, there is the internet. Well again tell me the censorship words and to whom to tell them!

Finally, Putin honestly admitted that paradise life in Russia could only come as a result of a nuclear strike.

I was 9 years old, no more. I was in the bus with a neighbor girl, went out together at the stop, and then I saw the phone on the ground. I have to say that there were no mobile phones in our family, they lived poorly. And I was an extremely educated child who knew perfectly what was good and what was bad. Well, I picked it up and thought that the person will obviously be very upset about the disappearance, it needs to be returned somehow.

Then a bright thought came to my mind. My neighbor Olli, who was driving with me, is working in the police. How successful it is! “Oll, take the phone to the police and let him find the owner!”

Olya took the phone, said she was just going to Daddy, so everything goes as well as it can not be better.

I went home and told my mother all the situation. Mom for some reason did not appreciate my drive for justice and told me that I am a fool and a prostitute, I don’t think about family.

Of course, I was upset. I still do not understand how you can first teach a child to act according to conscience and kindness, and then give puzzles for what you have done honestly.

After a while, I met Olga. I think, right now, she will at least reassure me that I didn’t do that in vain.

She asked about the phone, and Olya said to me, "I brought the phone to Daddy, and he left it to himself, he needs work."

Such things.

Without the curved hands, the parallel straight would never cross.

The Student Construction Squad had an "inter-" prefix, in its composition, in addition to Soviet students, there were Germans, Vietnamese and one Dutchman. The Dutchman was born German, but was a member of the Communist Party of the Netherlands and was considered Dutch for diversity. We lived in an empty summer school. Who is where, and we are in the drawing and schedule office.

Brushes, paints, cactus on the window. German and Dutch Communists. It was because of him that on the third day the cactus was painted in the colors of Wilhelm of Orange. Have you seen the flag? There is a red line above.

And all this was seen by a young teacher of drawing, worried about the creation of a student dormitory in the accounting room. I don’t know what she thought of the plant, but after taking the position of the commander of the parade, she said:

Wash it immediately.

Everyone looked at her. Vietnamese - with wide open eyes, Germans with a targeted pimple, Russians - with an Asian trick. It’s hard to refuse a beautiful girl, but have you ever washed a cactus? There are needles.

We didn’t wash either. We painted it in green.

The President said that Russian citizens are "ready to give their lives for the Fatherland". As a conscious citizen, I have already prepared myself. I have a long list of people whose lives I am willing to give for my country. I think it will make the country easier.

I literally just got out of the subway train, and I see: the girl quickly goes to the transition, moving the phone with headphones from one hand to the other. Suddenly, the headphones cling to the backpack of the passing guy and with one move disappear from her hands. She does not immediately understand what happened and is confused looking for the disappearance. In the meantime, the guy walks boldly on his way, and the headphones roll on the backpack. While the girl understood where they were going, the guy managed to walk 5 meters. Here the girl finally saw them and rushed to pursue them. I grabbed, pulled from the hot to the backpack too hard and, of course, unexpectedly for the guy. He turns around, pulling out his eyes, and sees that from his backpack some grandmother is pulling out the headphones! Of course, he grabbed them. She said, “This is mine! Give it!” :)

There was one grandfather in our entrance, and he lived alone. His sad story was known to the whole house.

His wife died when he was sixty years old with a younger, older son, drowned and killed at a beautiful time, even a grave where he did not know. The younger son died tragically, so that there was nothing to bury, burned in the fire.

Truth remained his granddaughter from the eldest son, she then visited grandfather from time to time. Well you know the youth, everyone runs somewhere, everyone is in a hurry and they have no time to give the elderly a worthy attention.

And recently, we started to notice, our grandfather started buying one or two bottles of vodka from each retirement.

Have you drunk, right? “We guessed, but we didn’t see him drunk, and at eighty they didn’t start drinking.

And then one early morning a gunshot sounded, but no one paid attention to it, if little, maybe that fell.

At noon, we found out that my grandfather was shot.

To death he prepared carefully, wrote a farewell letter, in death I ask not to blame anyone.

On the table was the money with the sign "for the funeral", on the bed a suit, a shirt and other things "in these things dress me", in the corner of the room a box with vodka "remember this." On the door of the apartment a note was attached "without the police not to enter."

And as the granddaughter said, the day before he asked her, "Come at twelve, I'll wait.

He covered the couch with cellophane, sat down and shot himself in the heart.

and all.

Later, when they examined the things of Grandpa Makar, they found his diary.

Over the course of a year and a half, he wrote sixteen goodbye notes and every time there was a quote "I couldn't today, maybe next time. »

This is such a sad story.

I recently worked as a tech operator at a local provider.

In addition to the main work, we have a telephone for receiving applications for gkh(?). People call, complain about wiring / pipes / life / etc., and we all record and pass on to the masters by mail.



So today, the comrade had an interesting dialogue. Further from his words:

“Oh these girls. By the will of fate, we have a telephone controller in the organization. She says the batteries are a little hot. I ask, have you touched? I hear – I was upset, shuddered, then “no, I don’t know, probably...” and dropped the phone. Such things.”

The edge of the ear caught a conversation at work of two mademoises at the age of slightly over 30:

(1) - I used to be excited when a man was watching himself, swinging. Well, you know that the belly with the cubes, the back with such wide pieces here (images the hand with a gesture spinning the widest muscles of the back), so that the hands were large, so that the cared for was, shaved, with a laying, tasty smell...

2) And now what?

And now it excites me if a man washes his dishes at least after him.

Losing illusions is the gain of the mind.