bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 62 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №21393
 15.10.2009
We asked – we answered!
In order to turn the horns of the trolleybus on the development in the right direction, the wires are provided with a "shooter". It moves the horns to the left line, tracking the electricity consumption of the passing trolleybus.
To turn to the left, you have to keep the launch pedal pressed when you pass the arrow. And to the right: you have to scatter and release the pedal before the arrow, it will run and that's all. By default, the shooter is always on the right.
The antibody:
Gathering the liliputs in Liliput, the liliput stands up and says:
“Today we suffered a great loss, the man we all respected, Gulliver, has died.
Voice from the back:
Fucking to dig!

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №21392
 14.10.2009
111: The balance is not a pitcher!! to
222: well, there may be an orientation in him and traditional, but Pidor is still that XD

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №21391
 14.10.2009
Today with a friend on a beer box bet that he will never be able to meet a girl with the phrase: "I want you..."! Better not to argue... He sits in the electric car in front of the cute girl in the headphones, catches her look and continues the dialogue:
He: Girl, you’re so beautiful that I’m ready to have sex with you right here!
She (pulling out the headsets): What?
He: My name is Denis! And you?

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №21390
 14.10.2009
I am writing an application for dismissal.
I will not speak by hand.
Yes, I’ve already cleaned up (I’ve already ruined 2 blackboards)
A woman from the HR department said the reason "because you’re all piddars" won’t go =)


[ + 56 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №21389
 14.10.2009
Growing up is when you stop being ashamed of Bart and become ashamed of Homer.

c) the fuz

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №21388
 14.10.2009
DtyZ ‎(21:17):
Better not to be you!

Drimon ‎(21:19):
Better than me and not.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №21387
 14.10.2009
Ghost Evg
Vicky - Anina's neighbor

Ghost Evg
What interests you specifically about her?

I am
The general characteristics. As for Noot. and :)

Ghost Evg
Inside it is a standard four-core processor, a couple of exobytes of a hard drive, operating terabytes - short of nothing remarkable. The body is very rarely ventilated, due to which it is quite privately smoked, although recently the issue of cooling and ventilation has been solved by almost 70%.

Ghost Evg
The body - the legs are standard, but elegant, in the area of the Firewire and USB ports everything is also wonderful - cm 90 in the circle, closer to the DVD-ROM about the same

Ghost Evg
Here, the front panel pumped a little - all the elegance of the lines rests on the excessive aggressiveness of the panel.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №21386
 14.10.2009
The accountant man argued with the room of three accountants, they did not give him any numbers. Word by word, the conversation went on to elevated tones, eventually the angry accountant comes out of the office with the words flying across the hallway:

They excited me, they excited me...I don’t care who of you will give!

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №21385
 14.10.2009
Modern packaging of toothpaste is not able to reflect the individuality of each member of the family, as metal tubes did at one time.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №21384
 14.10.2009
XXX: What are you doing?
I want to violate the guitar :)
xxx: and how does she react?))))
I was upset :D

[ + 50 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №21383
 14.10.2009
Asian girl with chestnut hair, who drove on October 13 about four on the orange branch to Novokuznetskaya (and how long it came out)!
I sat and watched how you stood, not because I was a goat and gave no place to anyone, but because in my backpack I had a large, fragile, very expensive foreign device, which would interfere, but would not withstand the whirlwinds in the passage. Please forgive me, sweetheart, I will now be tormented by my conscience for a whole month!

A man in glasses with a beard and a backpack.
— — —
Bring the plz to the top, suddenly she reads, or I am so ashamed (

[ + 65 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №21382
 14.10.2009
Do you need a hard disk? and how do you start playing?
0 – Why do you?
Yes, I decided to play a little on the weekend, I'll take off later.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №21381
 14.10.2009
XXX: Greetings
XXX: What is it?
YYY: Yes, so slowly, did you fight with your girlfriend?
XXX: I’ve moved... I’ve got longer :D

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №21380
 14.10.2009
Q: Do you have friends in Israel?
What am I so similar to?
Q: You answer the question...

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №21379
 14.10.2009
How to surprise a girl?

In principle, you can surprise a girl by offering her to marry!
Yyy: It is true!!! to
XXX is not for me!! 0 - O

[ + 60 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №21378
 14.10.2009
And I am afraid in the car to attach the seat belts: suddenly I will have to jump out of the car on the go O_o

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №21377
 14.10.2009
In the Heroes C?
<SENI>: I don’t have time to play with you. I accept the goods responsibly. Pistols of PM. New in the factory.
...
<SENI>: (((they need to be checked for marriage and forgery. 11 thousand of them, yopt.
...
<SENI>: I hate the...
...
<SENI>: what hell should I check them at all? I have no idea where to look, where to pull.
...
<SENI>: They are all the same. A stupid job.
...
<SENI> has done it. What is Hmm?
I am charging.
...
<SENI>: to the wreck of heroes, make a beer, fired.
Have the heroes been burned?
<SENI> is not. The chief of the warehouse came, took the batch I had received, and began to pour it into a bowl of oil. Two have flooded. The wooden. I am from my homeland.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №21376
 14.10.2009
I learned more in a couple of weeks than I did in universe.
yyy: oh, universe is shit) it's a scam, just to walk 5 years before work))

[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №21375
 14.10.2009
Evangelion: I am going home today, I am approaching the entrance, someone has thrown out the cactus, normal like that, in a pot. I’m getting closer to the sausage. Painted green and wrapped with soccer needles!!! to
Creativity fucking

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №21374
 14.10.2009
(12:48) xxx: Dear staff *****, today the DOTE championship will be held, at 17:00 I await everyone in the 309 room.
20:20 The Championship is Canceled! I was fired ((

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna