“Dragon Fly” is probably translated into Russian as “Strie Goat.”

I sit. I drink cognac with my guests. My cell phone is ringing. The number is my home. I find a radio under my ass. My ass has something to say to me.

I fell asleep at the lecture.
Dreamed of a fancy heroine.
Broke into the audience in full combat armor (well, at least it is not visible from which planet she is), approached me and insisted on asking:
Continue to write when?

This is futile:
and----
You know, I would also run away from a man who makes a liquid salad.
And it is not necessary to justify: on the keyboard, the letters "s", "b", "e" are quite close to each other, and "t" - away from them.
and----
Tell about this to any modern smartphone with default keyboard settings (auto-fixing default errors is usually enabled). If the smartphone has the word "glass" in the dictionary, but there is no word "beetle", it will correct the user, without even thinking about the location of the letters. So is!

Not agreeing
— — —
About the RPC. Today, not only is the church separated from the state, but also the faith from the church.

— — —
In my country (sarcasm), the church is already part of the state, and it seems like it is secular (
Faith cannot be separated from the church by definition.

I wonder what time Christ would have received if he had gone to the church to pray for the expulsion of Cyril. and. and.
The deadline?! and. He would just be crucified!

We live with my wife quite far from the center of the city, in a fairly "hopnic" district. I once lived in the center. I go and she complains to me:
Wife: It seems to me that the more we live here, the less intelligence I have.
Hey, what if I find it?

An announcement: "A man will meet a woman, age - 43 years 5 months 24 days 5 hours, weight - 85 kg, 123 grams, height - 183, 45 cm. I work in the Chamber of Measures and Weights.”

Dialogue in the bakery. The girl (d) and the seller (p)
Girl, I have a sweet biscuit.
Maybe a zebra? It is more tasteful.
No, I am a vegetarian.
And I am: Oh

I understood why schoolchildren are so cool and skilled in online games.
They do not drink!

Unknown facts from the lives of wonderful people
In the last years of life of the artist Boris Kustodiev due to a severe illness, his legs were refused, but he did not despair, but began to paint with his hands.

I took from my mother a 3-liter bowl of strawberries, packed a pack of cookies. I make the cookies straight into the bowl, I crack))) I almost physically feel like Gaidar’s Bad Boy. Bone is 31 years old.

(A number of Maine Coons)
[...] too well got to the mark of 8-9 kg on the tail

In fact, which led to the fall of the chairs, when Karbofos decided to take off the bird on his back.
One day, a fall was recorded with me in a chair.

The unforgettable feeling =)
Especially when you sit and watch a movie in your headphones, and then suddenly HUAJAK! And you are already looking at the ceiling, focusing on watching the headphones and a glass of beer flying in your face from above.

Besson's New Film - Lucy

Starring: Scarlett Johansson, Morgan Freeman, Analey Tipton

and Nail! Such a good name.

Can you get pregnant if you end up on the edge of the toilet and into the toilet itself, then wash the toilet with toilet paper with liquid soap and the drop button too. Is it possible to get pregnant if a woman goes to the toilet, so it will wipe, is it possible to get pregnant?
Or will anyone wash their hands and go to the toilet again? ? to And then I went to wash, can anyone wash or wash too and so get pregnant when washing?

In my opinion, the boy feels like his mother is not pregnant.

here here :
to this:

“Hello, wife, are you behind the compound?! to
Hi my dear, yes. Are you still fishing?
- Yes, caroche, open the motorland site from the lock-out.
Open the catalog/magazine/626gf/glass tab.
Well, I opened up a lot of options.
Find the cheapest!
-..... glass fork of the back door left...in availability, 10 U.E.
“Sanna, the back of the left door!”Please click on "Buy" All for now!
— — — —
In 10 minutes.
My wife aloo.
Yes my dear.
- and look also: this fork is left of the driver or left if you look at the car in front...
_________________________________________
Explain to those in the tank, and what’s the joke?


In the tank this is not relevant ;) and in the case of the car - lock the keys in the cabin, the second set is far away, around the woods. One way out is to break the cheapest of the glasses and open the car.

By the way, in some cars this cheapest glass may be the rarest, wait for it later...

When the little boy grew up to go to the toilet himself, but has not yet grown up to the switch, in the sorting I built a system with a motion sensor, a controller and a relief so that the light would turn on itself when he enters there.
Once in the guest saw a group with a family, whose children are slightly older than mine. Looking at the clever device in the sorting, he nevertheless stated:
- And I just put the stick next to the switch and taught the child to press the key with this stick.

by Facepalm

xxx: Russia rises from its knees, the iOs8 firmware has a ruble icon
YYY: If you judge by such criteria, Russia has long stood up from its knees - since time immemorial, the ayophans support GLONASS, and Apple added this support as the first in the world.
It was Apple that stood up from its knees.

007: I burned my seat.
ra_007: I went in the morning, switched on the junk heater, and I was there like a bite!

Now, overcoming the persistent desire of a two-year-old son to eat nothing, sometimes we fall into a stupor. I go into the kitchen now and see that he, putting his chair to the plate, is eating... swimming... right out of the stove... with a shoe shovel.
The curtain.

X: I’ve opened my eyes here yesterday – you’ll laugh...
X: No, you’ll laugh, I won’t say :)))