After reading the inscriptions on the pack of seeds "Spec-order":
Space should be peaceful.
Tobacco is poison!! to
Come to abundance!
I tried it myself, share it with a friend.
I began to doubt that it was actually seeds and not strawberries.

The acquaintance told, he went into the shop, there sits the seller holding his head, two young girls come in and look at everything around, then the seller calls these girls to him, the dialogue is as follows:
Do you need posters with autographs of famous artists?
Do you have Noize MC?
* Roots in a box and gets a poster wrapped in a tube*
P is
D – How much is it worth?
P - Go to my pharmacy for Nurofen'em
The girls fled, he gets a poster cutting out the date and drawing something like a painting with a black marker.
The girls come, give the pills, take the poster and leave with a happy face.
The curtain.

The case was funny at work, with a shopping...when he asked the shop owner (who was a little cried out) : "Have you a cold throat or rubbed it?" He no longer works with us...
hhhhhh :D

Leyla: Let those who have nothing to do on the Internet marry.

In the institute he filled the title sheet of the future course in psychology, so that the subject was approved by the lecturer.

While I went with admin to negotiate access to the printer, someone approached and wrote a few words to the title of the topic. I go back without looking at the print and carry it to the signature.

Thank you a stranger! Now, because of you, I write a book about the substitution of the mechanisms of the human mind by the example of grandmothers with chariots!

Opening hours in the morning:
Hi, Karen, I have a question. You are called Sisadmin because you have 3 sizes of breasts.
I am working as a sysadmin.
Q: Have you been fired? You were computer scientist!
See also: Wall

Diagnosis of impotence: cannot resist temptation.

Creating the fresco "The Secret Supper" Leonardo da Vinci was very long looking for the perfect models. Jesus was to incarnate the Good, and Judas, who decided to betray him at this table, was evil.
Leonardo repeatedly interrupted his work, going to search for the nurses.
One day, listening to the church choir, he saw in one of the young singers the perfect image of Christ and, inviting him to his workshop, made several sketches and etudes from it.
Three years passed. The "Secret Supper" was almost completed, but Leonardo never found a suitable mentor for Judas. The cardinal, who was responsible for the painting of the cathedral, hastened the artist, demanding that the fresco be completed as soon as possible.
And then, after a long search, the artist saw a man rolling in the garbage cane - young, but prematurely outdated, dirty, drunk and broken. There was no time for the etudes, and Leonardo ordered his assistants to bring him straight to the cathedral. With great difficulty he was dragged there and put on his feet. The man did not quite understand what was going on, and where he was, and Leonardo captured on the canvas the face of a man plunged in sins. When he finished his work, the poor man, who at that time had already recovered a little, approached the canvas and shouted:
I’ve seen this picture before!
and when? I was surprised by Leonardo.
Three years ago, before I lost everything. At that time when I
I sang in a choir, and my life was full of dreams, a certain artist wrote with
Christ to me...

Four candidates and only one mayor of Moscow.
“Who wants to be a billionaire?” All Russian TV channels.

Mall: I was unwittingly broken (silent in Spanish)
The voice of an employee sitting next to it: Cappuccino Cappuccino Deliciously Smelled))))

News from Yandex:
Chavez gave Medvedev Venezuelan chocolate and bananas
2nd Russia to deliver 35 tanks to Venezuela, Putin says

XX: You had pimples before. Where are you doing their business?
YYYYYYYYYYYY

XXX: Go to WOW?
YYY: Are you fighting with Anka again?
XXX: Is it so noticeable?

New Kent Convertibles Cigarettes

The Dirty Harry
I’m actually now going to wait for a bottle of vodka, which will contain a capsule with salt that will burst in the stomach only in the morning with a beetle)))

My girlfriend and I are working in the census, today in one of the houses, on our call, the door was opened by a man in the family. Then there was the following dialogue:
Who is?
Census, would you agree to participate?
Maybe tomorrow, or I’m drunk today.
I shut the door :)

On the news site:
None of the victims were opposed to the fact that the official forced the schoolchildren to kiss his shoes. What would you do in their place?
Commentary
Commentary removed
Commentary removed
Commentary removed
Commentary removed
Commentary removed

My friend tells me about communion:

Tagged: Zebalo
Chennai: Whole Fool is still in the cabins
SSC O_O
Sometimes you don't notice tomorrow, you sit down, and then you wear shorts and they are all dropped.
In the hustle of a Gondon
I wanted to fuck him.
Tagged: announcement wrote
Tags: in vain
Tagged: search
In the village there was a man who was in the shower.
The shower was like a prison.
Type: whole floor
where the ceiling of the pipes from which the water goes
Only walls, not cabins
Q: And he is going.
In the hot water there was such a smell.
He was not caught but was awarded a prize.
Posts Tagged: Posts
Ch: at night
I'm glad I live at home. o_o

The British build a computer on steam.

There is nothing to add ?

The evening bus. Conductor (k) is a healthy guy, under two meters tall. The company of drunk men (M). Such a dialogue:
K (the tired voice bubbles): We pay for the trip.
M: What if we don’t want to?
K (not changing tone): We get the puzzles, get out of the bus and wait for the next one.
All have paid.

I wake up in the morning. I go to wash. I hear some talk from the kitchen. It is strange. There is no one else at home. I go there. The TV is on, and the cat is lying on the pillow on the couch and watching some morning show. Totally exhausted.