bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №71438
 13.10.2012
Anniversary is not a reason to count the year. The anniversary is a reason to count friends.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №71437
 13.10.2012
The story of Grubas about the grandmother and the magnetophone. Rough as always in his repertoire, grandmother, tears, tumblrock.
Here is the real story.
We arrived in the village of Mikhailovka near Urupinsk. The distant relatives. Murdered land, murdered farm, murdered garden. Judging by dimensions, there was a powerful farm, but launched by the most impossible. The owner drinks, but the grandmother bites, the veterinarian. In the village, it turns out to be a very valuable and dear man. But it is not about him. They complain to me, the refrigerator does not work, rather it works continuously and does not turn off. In order not to burn it, it was just turned off until it was discovered. Already five times the master called, will come, a bottle of vodka will eat, promises to come tomorrow, replace the relay and ends. Judging by the stories, the local master, the fox is rare, he has been doing them with this relay for six months. Shortly I went there with one screwdriver and repaired it. Everything turned out to be simpler and more difficult to get rid of. In the village, the voltage is below 220V, so the refrigerator at this voltage can not freeze above 5 degrees of frost, and the master, the infestation, seen as biting a chip, all the peasants in turn touched the frost regulator to 15 degrees. So here, the regulator stands at 15 degrees of frost, the refrigerator tries to freeze those 15 degrees, the relay honestly monitors and does not see those degrees, so everything works continuously.
After turning the regulator to 4 degrees of frost, the refrigerator started working like a clock.
This is how we do our grandmothers in the village.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №71436
 13.10.2012
There is a huge benefit from women, even when they promise and do not come: teeth are cleaned, smoothly shaved and sleep on fresh blankets!

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71435
 13.10.2012
On the subject:

With cold welding, you’re definitely cool, can you see?

Why so much confidence in yourself and your knowledge? Cold welding is an epoxide glue with a metal shovel! They can make holes in the gasoline tank. There is a lot that goes beyond understanding power user's: cold paired, cold forging, cold Vera Vasilievna, cold borst.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №71434
 13.10.2012
Skype chat support:

Do we still have problems with the injection?
Are you asking or complaining?
I ask before I complain.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №71433
 13.10.2012
The husband went on a business trip, found a high thought:
I: O my distant prince, you are so charming in my sweet, foggy sleep and in the care of my sores. The light smell of your left shirt ghosts pursue me around the house.
Did you throw your shirt in dirty?and :-)

by Rucalicio

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71432
 13.10.2012
Hello, are you going to dance?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Now they are dancing.
So we will not dance in the temple, but in the theatre.
Theatre is the temple of art.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №71431
 13.10.2012
I am in a line in a small store. In front of me is Aren. Approach to (k) assertion
Pizza for 17
What has broken?
The best of the cheapest pizzas I have just tried.
Still quieter and sad:
My life is tiny.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №71430
 13.10.2012
I think of horses more and more.
Yyy: Do you dream of Xenia Sobchak?
XXX is no. Fuck it all by horse!!! to

[ + 10 - ] Comment quote №71429
 13.10.2012
We stayed with the girls on the youth floor. Suddenly I see my very good friend, I approach him, beat his fist in the chest and say, "Nikita! Hi to you! How many years, how many winters! I raised my eyes, it wasn’t him, with a wild whistle I left him. Then we went to the bar with the girls, we sat at the table and drank. I turn back, and there is Nikita. I say to him: "You must go! I walk with the girls, I see you, I walk, I beat my fist in the chest, I say "Hi Nikita!" How many years, how many winters!", I raise my eyes, and it’s not you! With a wild whistle she left him!". He shrugged his head, smiled. I turn back to the table, and the thought in my head:" Fuck...Who Is This?and "

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №71428
 13.10.2012
Fiona El Tor by Friedrich.

Friedrich: Fiona \o/

Fiona El Tor:

Everyone is dancing

Frederick: O

Frederick: O

Fiona El Tor:

Frederick: O

Frederick: O

Frederick O/_

by Friedrich: O

Frederick: and

bocca_chiusa: *\o/*

Cheerleaders, yeah yeah!

Friedrich: Yes, did you want to say something?

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №71427
 13.10.2012
From the hub, about the new method of creating browser games:
XXX is cool! There was an idea to make a proposal to the girl in the form of a quest :). At the end of the game there will be a surprise. I might appreciate it :)
Yyy: Just do not overwork with difficulty, or failure will not pass.
zzz: Okay, stupid girls quests won’t pass and get off. The main thing is that in the results of the quest, the girl did not turn out to be a bearded Sisadmin.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №71426
 13.10.2012
Leaving Ukraine is not an emigration, it is an evacuation

[ + 37 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71425
 12.10.2012
The Bar Bar
Take Take Take Take
Tagged with: bar bar bar bar bar bar bar

People, what about you?! What kind of shit is this??? How do you listen to it!! On the radio several times a day. And who, shit, writes that at all?!! to
Fighting by shooting (

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71424
 12.10.2012
I could never understand these nonsense about the neighbor's wi-fi, such as "buried the router with all the entrance", "hanged the ad - Neighbor, thank you for the password 1111" and so on.
Is it in our century, all these gigs do not have their unlimited megabit channel for 50 at home?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №71423
 12.10.2012
xxx: and I 'box' with an imaginary opponent in the morning =) For me, it's just to raise the tone.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Not funny... ?
Why do you joke? I am very serious. What about the diction?
zzz: It seemed to be an imaginary opponent :)

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №71422
 12.10.2012
Comments on the bank robbery:
Viper_69: I bought the products there last night.
I put the products in the package and
There is a man, he says.
phone "Good Knee, I take a liter and 2
Half a cup of beer" and pulls silver
the card to the place where the ATM was.
Time 9 hours approximately, 10 seconds
Thinking and looking. and the knees,
The bank is missing"

[ + 42 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71421
 12.10.2012
We talk about witches.
I: If you remember, I am married for the fifth time. I understand witches better than the Inquisition.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71420
 12.10.2012
The transistor

It was long ago. Even in those distant times, when computers were not just big, but very big!Adminov then called - operators, Kotte (Maharadze) - was a sports commentator, and the transistor was called not only a semiconductor device, but also a portable radio receiver assembled on these very transistors. But here in it were the same coils wrapped with a license, t. The ferrites were not yet of very high magnetic permeability to wrap a single-wire enamel.

Well, in the conclusion of this lecture for the fullness of the picture, we will not forget about Schroeder (at least Gerhard).

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №71419
 12.10.2012
Article about the Ordin Caves
From the side, the Ordin cave looks blue, because the water in it is clean and transparent. And, by the way, very cold: some places up to minus 20 degrees. This naturally makes research difficult. andquot;

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna