Forgotten about the marketers:

This space route is absolutely safe for any trader!* is

According to the results of the inspection of the heavy cruiser "Cassiopeia" 11 years ago

You still cannot understand that Russia is an empire. That Russian is not blood, it is spirit. The Russian is not the one whose blood is cleaner, but the one whose thoughts are clear.



And to decide whether a person’s thoughts are clear, it will be you. Scrap and spirituality come to the rescue when logic and common sense have already said everything.

In the office there are always cats, they just have nowhere to go. What laws does the employer violate, according to which article to engage him?
WOU: Not providing separate living space for cats.

In the middle of the last century it was completely incomprehensible how a person thinks (now this is also incomprehensible, but at a different level).

XXX: Girls, we learn the great and powerful (copied in the neighboring theme): "You whom this swallow of stallerous, swallowed earring swallow called?"
XX: My vocabulary has expanded considerably. I tried to find out what these mysterious words meant.
You can’t learn this!!! to
Half of the words used are wrong!!! to
"Stolerossova" - is not in Russian at all!
There is "Stoerosa"
Not a dust, but a dust.
And the point is that the "stoerossova dub" is large in size, but rarely a dumb person.
Why the letter "l" is not clear in principle!
About "Shaball" has already been written.
Generation of Pepsi, fuck it!
He can’t even argue!

ZY: Sorry for my education, which really interferes... sometimes...

This is our new car, made in Russia.
Shlepenbach: The tram, of course, is beautiful, but if he still had a tarantula, so that the foreigners on the way would crack.

When you meet your prince, how many cats do you think you will have?

to this:

XXX: I think...
Chuck Norris will die someday.
And then I will reassure all the soldiers that he wasn’t dead, but just went to kill Death.

Does this naive man really expect to survive Chuck Norris?

The meaning of the phrase "visible-invisible" is most clearly understood when you get a salary.

The Hurghada airport. Early morning. Multiple flights take off at the same time (about 7 am). Domodedovo, Rostov, Peter, Petrozavodsk, Kiev and Tallinn. The passport control. Everyone speaks Russian, including the Arab. Two Estonians of the type "we are not with you" quietly negotiate on their own. It is their turn to put the stamp. The foreigner asks something, the Estonians answer on their "shaltay-boltai". The Arab suddenly rushes, the Estonians immediately explain everything in Russian. The servant is satisfied. Passport control on the great and powerful continues.

Dear, I am pregnant.
What o-o-o?! to
From the 1st of April, my dear.
Lucia, you can also get a heart attack.
How did you call me? What kind of lucia am I?! to
From the 1st of April, my dear.

Dad, buy me a fox.
XXX: and the sword
XXX Who Eats Who?
YYY: We are them
XXX: You can’t eat them! They are Mimi!
Yyy: You just need to eat cute animals to get better yourself.
I think you’re educating me badly =(
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY The previous is not counted. We need to eat bad animals and cockroaches.
Good girls only eat bad animals and cockroaches. So is better?
I don’t want to eat cockroaches ((
YYY: And I’ve already eaten=(

When my current wife married me a month ago, I was in the seventh sky.
And now?
Now on the third.

The Russian liberals are always ashamed of their country, but very rarely of themselves.

Yesterday I bought myself a plush unicorn.
The ship...
The third night proves to me that he is natural.
Yesterday I bought... the third night proves...

Damn, if they were logically correct!

More in the bowl (oh, the world should know about it):

The man depicts himself as alpha-samsa

Service for repair of household appliances.
Client (talk about TV): No sound, no image, but overall everything works.

I recently went to the planetarium. It was interrupted at the moment when the lecturer told us that in 12 billion years our galaxy will collide with another and at this moment the child stood behind me... apparently he felt all the futility of being.

Ornella Mutit: Why is reproduction in space impossible?
Pol Volkov: I suggest trying until the last!
Y K: Astronauts do not reproduce in captivity.
Clara Zmeyeedova: Not to break the accounts. It has to fly as much as it has gone.

xxx: and I would fuse Yanukovych in any case in any country that is not unfortunate - he brings misfortune
YYY: He is already there.