Being dressed in the latest fashion and being dressed with taste is not the same.
Joseph of Egypt

A story about how important and beneficial it is to do sports. From the stories of Vasilić's technique. 80s of the last century.

Once in the squadron to us got to serve a guy, from those who had to have time to pay all the debt to the Motherland in two years. After the institute with the military department, in general, the “coyote”, for those who understand. But he came to serve heavily after the institute, having twenty-eight years behind him, a wife, two restless children, and a stable life and work in Moscow.
Why then exploded his military commando, it will remain a mystery for those who need these mysteries.
He graduated from Moscow Energy, worked with us as the head of the aviation equipment group. (I remember now how he lied that a beginner singer who could kiss the sand was studying with him.) Next is more interesting.
His height was two meters, and a few more centimeters. But it didn’t seem long, it just seemed huge. Because there was a center and a half. And all of them were placed fairly evenly below the head. In the 1990s, they said about them, “Brother quadratic.” How he was chosen is a separate story.
The locals, whose average height did not exceed two dead camels, ran with horror as he went to the desert for half a scorpion for souvenirs in his free minute. And most importantly, he always said that at the time of his vocation, he played rugby in the top league. The name of the team was Phil, if I remember correctly. And when he entered the storytelling rage, you could even hear that he went to the army exactly in the break between the times. That’s why they fooled it all.
And what is rugby, I did not specifically explain. It wasn’t shown on television either. Only then said the clever castle of the comesque, guys, don't worry, there is such a game, it's like our handball, but a lot of fun, all the loops on the football field roll, the gates there are right, and the ball is uneven.
But it was a fairy tale. Now the history.
Somehow we had to urgently marry one of our heroes with a local beauty. I ordered a restaurant at the best hotel in the city. Then the soldiers normally got, they could afford. And in order to balance the bride's numerous family, the whole free squadron was summoned to this shabbas. All those who did not go on a business trip, who are not on duty, and somewhere else in business, in general, a few people.
In the restaurant we took a separate room, in the middle of which there was a solid table of eighty people, with a decent meal, and already sitting behind it some unsympathetic people. I almost immediately, from the second round, managed to land on a geographically successful place, so that I could see no one but the vodka pyramid of Cheops.
Our rugby attacker has arrived. Before the beginning, he stood with the locals at the entrance for a long time, had something there with them, melted, and when he sat next to me, suddenly stated: "You know, they have such a tradition here, you must definitely have the bride's shoe folded, otherwise, think, the wedding failed."
I honestly listened to him in my ears, because it wasn’t long ago. I started drinking a lot and often. Our combat squadron, which could, if convenient, drink an entire aircraft of alcohol, hardly had time for these former nomads. We greeted, gave and drank again. A regular wedding, it seemed, would be, but my tireless neighbor with every drink he drank more and more, knocked something under his nose, and slowly slipped off the chair. Then suddenly he said clearly, “It’s time,” and submerged under the counter.
Our detachment, of course, did not notice the losses of a fighter, fighters and without him was enough. They drank one more, as suddenly the bride just kissed by the bridegroom whispered, and also all went under the table. Further, all the women at the table began to whisper in a row, someone shouted, "They are stealing the shoe," and the bride's male relatives quickly jumped and grouped at the exit of the hall. At that point, it was hard enough for me to realize that it was the elected people who had to stand up to the terrible deceit.
The monster came out of the table. He swallowed everyone in the air with white female shoes, then with a smooth movement he drove it under his mouse, and leaned forward, with some beastly rift ran to the exit. And he didn’t run straight, but with some subversions. He ran so that half of the guests, concentrated in the door, immediately decided that they had come here in vain, and the other half just rushed out. After a second, a vivid hurricane passed through, pushing the most uncomfortable, and even at the same time, not very breaking the open doors on our side.
When the crowd of excited guests reached my corner, I fell out after all the others to vent out into the street, and there I saw our terminal run in front of the hotel on flowers, a man riding six guests, holding in front of him on the stretched hand this shoe like an Olympic torch.
It was interesting to watch. We knocked and walked. He sometimes stopped, threw his shoe in front of him, waited for the guests to break away from him and run to him, again shouted, threw himself into that pile and fought with them there, in an unfair fight. It was seen with the naked eye that the pleasure of this show is only our man.
But it all ended well, when they were tired and smashed enough, everyone returned to the table. We brought shoes from the street. Then I remember someone trying to drink vodka from her, already quite hollow. And the bride complained all night that she was not going to go on a wedding trip, and then our good Gulliver gave her his shoes in size forty-seven for happiness.

Men, don’t look for women, look for money, and women will find you.

I am crying)
The topic of the discussion (!) How to distinguish a virgin from (!) Ordinary woman?
Answer: If the ratio of the square of the distance between the nipples to the difference in the number of teeth and ears is equal to the volume of the thighs divided by the volume of the waist is greater than 1.44 - then the woman is necessarily virgin.
Just like that)

I really felt that I live in Peter when walking on a weekend night in the Duma watched a picture as one just in a salad drunk guy stood and, absolutely not embarrassed by the illumination and the number of people around, watered the barrier, and at this moment from the company passing by no less blue was issued the phrase: A young man and you do not seem that it is a bit uncultured from your side to do so.

The kitchen is preparing for the feast, the cat runs through the kitchen, asking the masters: Well, cut me anything, well cut it!
Germany: Hans, this speaking cat seems to have to be to the scientific bureau!
England is you! The speaking cat. Let’s drink tea? You’ll tell me about your difficult life, we’ll play chess and walk around London!
Russia: If you don’t shut up, I’ll cut you down!

amendments to the law of our government on the prohibition of "cat topot" - I prepared - my 2nd dogs were strictly punished, promised not to subvert...

He worked as an engineer in one of the city's 1C companies. Since then, my father has been pushing me in this direction for a very long time and, as if, stopped. Today, my mom took a package with the logo 1C brought to me a few months ago, put it in and thoughtfully asks: I wonder, can it withstand a lot? Dad smiled, turned to my side, blinked and said, “Everything except updating, right, Vasek?”

Announcement at the City Forum:
I sell a faloimiter B / U, pink, relief, 20cm. It was not used for purpose.
Disadvantages: at the base scratched inscription "ya pipisco".

Gertzog: I am a girl. Confirm it is not difficult, there is a Skype, there is a microphone.
L'ecran: Sissy, how did I understand, isn’t it?

In Yulmart, the discount section sells the Death Star - a giant combat space station, equipped with energy weapons of extraordinary destructive power and capable of destroying entire planets. Comments from buyers:
Is she on wheels?? to
Shelaev Andrey Vladimirovich: Is it necessary to change the rubber for the winter or will it run?
DarthAlex: I don’t use ion guns. How to update the driver?
Realpartzet: When will the new party appear? I am very close to the house, the rebels are noisy in the evening, I cannot sleep.
Dmitry is a great thing! I use it for the second year, never broken.
Master YODA: I will give it whole or in spare parts by authority... Not beaten, not painted... The second master... Ask YODA...
Jonick: Since this year, my Death Star has to make insurance for the event of DTP in space all the time.

c 4pda comments on paper flashes

What they will not invent.
A paper smartphone, for example... talked, smiled, threw... talked, twisted, smoked

Domestic automotive industry did not get into the Top Gear broadcast of the worst cars in history, because of the The authors do not consider them cars.

Sometimes I think the wires under my desk will be easier to break.

When a lie becomes the norm, the truth is persecuted.

From one of the sports websites:

xxx:"If some fans think I don’t respect them, I hope they understand it isn’t!"

Chernomyrdin turned in the grave after this phrase

YYY: approvingly turned

The news of the crash of the oil train. The stones:
The oil is running at such a speed that the railways can no longer cope with such a load.

I lie in the hospital with a knee injury, today I had to have a novocaine blockade to do. I lie in expectation. However, instead of the blockade, I was suddenly placed with a huge enema. They are confused, mla... ><

As they said in our company: Wednesday has come - a week has passed
YYY: Did your company consist of students dismissed because of wow?

If your wife is a chicken, you are not an eagle.