bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 95 - ] Comment quote №22760
 21.11.2009
You are all about pedestrians and motorists! And I want to say THANK YOU to the subway engineers who, seeing a late man running from the stairs into the first wagon, wait to hold the door!!! Thank you guys))))))))))))))))))

[ + 102 - ] Comment quote №22759
 21.11.2009
martalex
I understood what the great minus of humanitarian subjects such as philosophy is.
martalex
You cannot prove to a fool that he is a fool. He can always say "this is my opinion".

[ + 110 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22758
 21.11.2009
For a long time, one question has been concerned: when all kinds of satanists call out demons, the demons there in hell are also trying to avoid the call in every way?

[ + 92 - ] Comment quote №22757
 21.11.2009
Today I realized 100% that I am the evil brother XD
WOW: In the sense, what is it?
Yesterday night I came home quietly opened the door, Kedy removed hearing the speech of a friend from the room, and this sister and her boyfriend are watching the paranormal phenomenon.
Would you?
Well, I quietly approached the door, sharply opened it and whispered both. She became accustomed to her sister, but the guy whispered and instantly turned off, electricity came to itself after half an hour. Now he’s afraid to come home XDDD
Sponge Under the Table: The Evil XD

[ + 92 - ] Comment quote №22756
 21.11.2009
came1ot (11:33:36 20/11/2009)
A police officer from Arkansas came to the challenge of a woman whose daughter did not want to wash, and with the permission of his mother, he offended the child with an electric shocker.

___________________

You are Russia, Russia.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №22755
 21.11.2009
If someone is not sweet, he is not lying there.

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №22754
 21.11.2009
We went to a conference in Turkey. There are 250 people, haha. And we were staying in a 5* hotel, not to say, "ultra everything was crazy." The trip is quite short, but everyone has time - and drinks to try, and the Turks to embrace, and congratulate themselves with their own coolness. Even a small cultural program was arranged, in the form of renting a micro-jeep and a trip to the neighboring village for adventures. I am not about that.
So, the last day of the trip, more precisely early in the morning, gathered at the airport. Such a large-scale conference should be captured on a photo, for which a photographer was specially brought from the Motherland. The task is to shake
250 faces at a time, and preferably in the background of the hotel. How to do? From the roof of the hotel. We all quickly gather in the crowd on the square in front of the main building; a photographer from the roof signals that a bird is now flying out. Do you cry at five in the morning under the window? It is a decent hotel.

The end of history. A peaceful German burger wakes up in his room in the morning and, as it is, in a coward and a maid, goes to the balcony to smoke.
By lighting a cigarette, he immediately presses her, because 250 drunken Russians (and that, we do, in the morning) slide down on him from the bottom. The German looks at the sides - on the neighboring balconies of no one. There is nothing better than shaking our hands. 250 Russians respond and continue to consider the German.
I don’t think he’ll go to Turkey anymore. He knows what more can be expected of the Russians.

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №22753
 21.11.2009
A man tells a friend:
“I got married recently, I carry her on my arms around the apartment, and here she says:
“You, we have already signed up! Let me cross my neck!”

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №22752
 21.11.2009
@CraB
I bought a big wife, and now I think I have a small one :(

@Stapler
The monitor?

@CraB Yes Yes

[ + 61 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22751
 21.11.2009
On my provider’s website:

Internet provider InterZet offers the champions of the computer game Counter-Strike to organize the passage of service in the army of the Russian Federation virtually, that is, without breaking away from the screen of the home computer. According to the internet provider, the level of tactical training of Counter-Strike champions,, exceeds the training of special units of real troops.

To test this thesis, InterZet organizes a series of paintball competitions between Counter-Strike champions and paintball champions against real army special forces.

According to the results of these matches will be made a proposal for the armed forces of the Russian Federation.

[ + 182 - ] Comment quote №22750
 21.11.2009
A huge thank you to the people who caught my phone on the escalator in the subway at Pushkinskaya! You’re not only good guys who caught him and passed him up to another row, but you haven’t even dropped the call!
Peter is the greatest man.

[ + 90 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22749
 21.11.2009
We are teenagers of the 21st century. girls, in love with tall anorexic boys with thin legs, boys, in love with boys, girls, like boys, boys, like no girls...we are the propaganda of non-standardity and individuality.

I would like to say good luck to you, the 21st century!
Aputo

[ + 82 - ] Comment quote №22748
 21.11.2009
NikoLya: And I know you’re shaking...
Go on naked!!! to
NikoLya: you cheated, I seriously... your mother called me... you would at least close the door... and tell her that I cheated her and I will not introduce you lowly :D
Apossum: The...

[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №22747
 21.11.2009
Fantastic abilities man possessed - from the basements of the Gestapo left, hypnotized the guard, people's thoughts read at a distance, his inspired anyone, the future predicted...This is only unclear - why in the film every time they knock on his door, asks "Who is there?"...

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №22746
 20.11.2009
cnd: key "7" on the keyboard broke
WAWA: Why is it?
cnd: I asked too many questions...

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №22745
 20.11.2009
In the old old days, in my youth, I was fascinated by hacking mailboxes for interest, presenting a list of five secret questions that you should not write to restore a password.
1) What color is my hair? (Yes yes! It is! Blonde for the first time.
What color are my eyes? (Cary came from the second time)
In which city/country/planet do I live? (usually from the first time after viewing the infos in aske)
What is my zodiac sign (their 12, maximum from 12 times)
5) Any info from ZJ, blog and personal page in the innet.

The Five Funny Questions.

With whom did I change my husband? (I hope my husband saw it)
2) What is the name of my little friend?
The girl's surname of my cousin's cousin
4) My weight (it's great if the person forgot the password - went, weighed, fit? almost like a fingerprint - the main thing is not to get fat or lose weight)

And most importantly - remember, there will always be a person smarter than a brutforcer :) fool and firewall and antivirus will not save.

WB

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №22744
 20.11.2009
xxx: I decided to take the female pads as a steel. I come to the pharmacy, ask for pads, they ask me: what size do you have? I am on the machine and answer: forty-first.
XX: I don’t often want to fail through the earth.
The saleswoman, which is remarkable, immediately understood everything.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №22743
 20.11.2009
to this:
To my wife came the sms: "Mommy, this is my new number, put 200, then I will explain everything, and our son is only 3 months old, how he will explain if he can't even talk.
-----------
It was written: Then. It will explain (explain)

[ + 80 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22742
 20.11.2009
People!! to
Make someone a screensaver so that when it was turned on, a Word document was visible, gradually filling up with text and all this under a quiet tap of the keys...mmmmmm...

P.S
I search on Google every day.

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №22741
 20.11.2009
Parents sometimes shock their niipazza with logic.
YYY: What is it?
xxx: Yes, they told me that they wanted to call me Anton, but they changed their mind because they would be annoyed by Antoshka-kartoshka, and they would not think that they would be annoyed by Denishka-Pipishka.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna