Our problem is not that we don’t live that way, but that we don’t live there.

In the plane I heard a wonderful dialogue between an old grandfather (years 80-90) and a young man (years 20).
I sat next to them, at the passage. Grandfather is in the middle, the boy is at the window.
After take-off, the unfolding aircraft submerged in the clouds - and it immediately shaken strongly in turbulence. No line is visible, an aero-navigation fire blows out in the window. Daddy is sleepy and the boy is scared. I see, the boy closed the window with a curtain, then opened it, then pale, greenered, his eyes were frightened.
Are you not afraid of flying? Suddenly he asks his grandfather.
“When he was alive, he was afraid,” the grandfather replied flegmatically.
I should have seen the guy’s face.
There were no more questions until the end of the flight.

Ivan: I am convinced once again: we have the most beautiful girls in Omsk!!! and :)
Ivan, and the birds are fucking.

Sergey Kalugin (solist of the group "Orgia of the Righteous") in his book:

There was an epochal dialogue at home.

The Israeli friend:
Let’s go to London on the Pays together?
My wife is shocked:
In what?? to

Photo of a girl on a dating site. Field, she stands half-turning her back to the chamber, in a striped closed swimsuit. The comments:
What a ass.
I want you.
Better such ones.
Zebra in the pastures

Ansonna on the example of the porner:
We will cut 16+!

The case at the Military Command on medical examination:
You have three large moles on your back to remove them, otherwise we will not be able to take you to the army.
- and I can't now, I'm afraid, we all in the family are afraid of removing the motherboard, he is up to 27 years old.
What if the age limit is extended to 30?
Then I will break the tradition and I will be afraid until 30.

Coca-Cola signs contract with Lotus F1
Eee : and?
XXX: It will be fun.
Eee: Yes
Red Bull vs Burn
Eee : No
It will be better
When the salt
Eee: Ride out
Eee: on the roads
New Year’s Trailers!! to
xxx: ^ _ ^

When I was 8-10 years old, we had a six with a wonderful magnet. I always listened to Russian radio in the car. And here we go somehow to the country, and in the program of the table of orders called a young man very hungry. In the background there is a whisper of bottles and laughter of comrades. And the guy: "I have called? Am I on the air? I want to send a huge greeting to Lena...my ex-wife. And the song "Well, what a terrible you are!"Lenka, hello!!and "

Weather, I will buy a new car.
The old what?
I went on a pass today. I was shaved in the morning. Dick photographer when the photo was being processed asked: "Can I shave you a little?"

Moscow metro is very quiet, quiet, almost uninhabited.As a resident of Tokyo I tell you.

Technical support is fun:
<[130] WTO> Added, now everything is well
<[130] WTO> Ooh, ninida
<[130] WTO> But you are well too

Running line in the news of the 5th channel, ))))))) Yakut Shamans Destroy Tucks over Switzerland, for the shootings of the new film Nikita Mikhalkov. The new comet. Yup...

On the radio : "It was at a time when Agutin could only pronounce the first half of his surname"

She is missing again (
I don’t understand him (facepalm)
Anya: maybe he just wants friends, and I think more because I have a chronic disorder. b)))))
Me: No... I don’t think he wants friends.
May: It just doesn’t have time
Fuck, is it so strange? I have this experience for the first time, so I am confused. and :(
Me: You don’t know how he works. You can write to him no time, not that you kilometers of SMS to write.
What about tonight, Bella?
Anja: ask "how do you do it?"
Me: mmm... and in the evening he is hanging, for the whole day, for which there was no time.
I mean, it’s a bad thing 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉
I have 5 points 😉

I work in a sales company 1C. A client (K) comes and tells the manager (M) that she doesn’t work and doesn’t work.

Q: I have nothing to do, the new version of the program is somewhat complicated and incomprehensible.
M: Do you have a specific question about it or do you not know how to conduct accounting?
Q: A specific question, yes, how to conduct accounting?

Listen, when do you think Google will be able to overthrow governments?
YYY: Haa... not soon
YYY: They SOPLY chew
This is Samsung.
XXX: No, rather than Google
YYY: They have units to develop military equipment
YYY: There are already semi-automated machine guns
xxx: > there are already semi-automated machine guns
On the Android?
xxx: shot, checked mail, entered the contact, killed noted

With Habr discussing the post that a man created a script that allows randomly ordering gifts on Amazon.
There are discussions about the need for such a program to buy "unnecessary" gifts.
I think it’s easier to have a wife. It will handle casual purchases better.

I went to Peter with my wife for a weekend. We stayed at a mini-hotel. In the morning we come for breakfast, and we find that besides us, the guests are all like picking up a girl. I would like to be happy, but no...the woman looks badly, the girls are all tense...they ate in silence, went out on the balcony to smoke and here we see a guy in Superman T-shirt appear in the kitchen.
With his wife in one voice: "Superman! He came to save you!

I am (09:34:33 22/11/2012)
And the skin of the foxes brought me.
Mom (09:34:47 22/11/2012)
Why is
I am (09:34:58 22/11/2012)
What why?
Mom (09:35:23 22/11/2012)
well