xxx> call, say "the proxy server refuses to accept the connection, contact your system administrator"
xxx> with an evil voice answer "It is better not to contact him";

Among those who love the Motherland, there are both amateurs and professionals.

As Nikolai Adolfovich once said, "I will leave for a moment, if someone comes to me - then tell me that I went to look for him."

The rabbit had not had a rabbit for so long that even the wolves were afraid of it in the forest.

> The only programmer was finally exhausted,
> but submitted the project – and even on time. It is beautiful! The young man!

Remember the classic:

A0 programmers decided to make the product,
One asked, “Where is the money?” and there were nine.
Nine programmers stood before the boss.
One of them did not know FoxPro, and there were eight left.
Eight programmers bought IBM.
One said, “Mark is better!” and there are seven.
7 programmers wanted help to read,
One has a screw, and there are six left.
Six programmers tried to understand the code.
One of them went crazy, and there were five.
Five programmers bought a CD-ROM
One brought the Chinese disc - the remaining four.
Four programmers worked on it.
One of them praised Pascal, and three remained.
3 programmers on the network played Doom,
One slightly stumbled, and the count became equal to two.
2 programmers have joined friendship: "win".
One is tired of waiting - there is only one left.
The programmer has taken everything under control.
But I met with the employer, and they remained 0.
0 programmers cheated the angry boss,
Then he fired one, and became their FF.

I’ve been in my own shower so long ago that every time I’m asked how old I’m, I painfully try to remember if I’m 30 or 30 years old.
– – – – –
A professional examination was conducted, the therapist asked my age, the answer gave seconds after 2 only. To her astonished question "What age do you remember?" he replied that the year of birth, unlike age, does not change every year, and to remember information, which during this time will only be useful to me a couple of times - irrational, easier to calculate when needed.

From the Animal Forum:
How to forgive a cat? The situation is as follows: You want to laugh around and meu says, you start to smooth it - immediately goes to another free place in a radius of half a meter and goes back to bed and meu says, in general, all the same cycle until you begin to ignore it, at the same time, the hands are not given, next to it also does not sit, maybe there is a code combination? 3 times for the tail to pull for the tail and 2 times to pull for the back left leg?

Palich: We sit with my brother and catch fish. Summer, morning, sunshine and silence Suddenly the brother jumps up, and with the scream “Oh, fucking, I almost forgot!” pulls the cell phone. He picked up the number and sang in the tube: “Dinozaurs, Dinoa-a-a-Vrics.” The song of M. Boyarsky. Then, as in nothing, he sits down and continues to cheer. I ask in the shower, “What was it now, fucking?” he declares quite calmly, “The woman called for work. She will now be singing and chanting this song all day. Tomorrow I have a plan for the Bremen Musicians.”
That’s what I understand trolls.

by Interstellar
Q: What is the movie about? About the corn?
yyy: I would say about what can push a single food :D

Olga: Hi, little girl) What do you do at school?
MonsterOnALeash: No such assessment
What if I find?

One of our employees decided to stick over colleagues and smashed the toilet paper with Ben Gay ointment. The other employee went to the toilet and naturally roasted his ass. Feeling the fire that encompassed the bulks, the guy launched from the toilet in the direction of the soul on the second spacecraft. He slipped on the canvas, crashed into the closet, stumbled and fled further. And the closet collapsed on the joker and broke the joker’s rib and two fingers on his hand.
Karma is her mother.

Review of the Game (Train Simulator)

and numb:
The game has a very small set of possibilities.
In the game you can not: take money from the lochs, deliver the left cargo, roll with the conductors.
As a result, this product cannot be called a simulator.

Harbour on a train on a magnetic pillow

A: The tickets will be gold. Already now, a plateau is worth like an airplane, and a coupe is a luxury in general. Prices were compared on the Moscow-Omsk-Moscow route in November of this year. No matter the difference in time.
B: Do you really think that the prices of all kinds of tickets (primarily rail) and gasoline in Russia depend heavily on the cost of construction/operation/self-cost?
A: I don’t know what it depends on. I know only that trains are not in my pocket, unlike planes. No matter how absurd it sounds.

"Deputies want to launch on Russians bio-dossier"

As in an Enlightened Europe:

Moses, according to the bio-dossier, you are a homosexual.

here here :

More in the under-Russian: "directly to South Korea"

Right up, cattle and coal!! >_<

— — — —

A story from school childhood:
The house is painted,
A triangle with a dull angle.
A triangle with a sharp angle (any triangle is suitable, but this is not the essence).
A triangle with a straight angle.
Almost half of the class signed their creations as follows:
1) The thumbnail.
2) The Osteoporosis.
and...
and the rectangle.)

...I go into the office, take off my pants, and there are pink cowboys with cows. The doctors almost stumbled.
==== is

All my clothes are dark and dark with a bunch of pockets and metal. And on the legs are usually barbers or motobots. And when on the apartment seats you have to rush, new acquaintances usually break a pattern from colorful striped / cellular socks. I like them.

So, am I the only one who read the headline of the news "Sea Cats Rapture Penguins" and first thought about the U.S. Special Forces?

I cut my hair and painted it in a different color. I am satisfied at work. Leaving the office my boss, such a whispering and giving
R: Xenia, you have something in your head!
I: Yes, I am often told that. and :)

at work (on the interests of husbands):
Most of all, I like hunting. They sat in the siege for 3 hours, without breathing, without cracking, and the cock took and did not come.

From Sapphire WoT

>> hacked because the password was simple
As simple, I also set the year of the canonization of St. Paul. Dominic Gregory IX (1234) and how did they guess?? to