bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №146878
 28.11.2017
lx> it turned out that in the "Children" sing "...and a fun dog-goodly", not "...and a fun goodly".

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №146877
 28.11.2017
In social hypocrisy there is that subtle and indisputable line, which is called "polite" - silence plus a few accepted rituals. You say good morning to everybody, but it is not good for you, and you generally want to see these roses at least in the morning, at least in the evening. You respect politeness.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №146876
 28.11.2017
Patriots expecting some repentance from modern Germans are increasingly reminiscent of American Negroes: people who have never been slaves are demanding apologies from people who have never been slave owners.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №146875
 28.11.2017
XXX is all. I started the winter.
YYY :?
YYY: Did you go to the catch?
The umbrella was removed from the bag.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №146874
 28.11.2017
BadGirl: As a child, I ate a whole spoonful of vanilla at once, it was disgusting to taste.
BadGirl: That’s all you need to know about me.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №146873
 28.11.2017
The abandoned Northern Crown Hotel in Peterburg:
The hotel is allegedly cursed: in 1995, Metropolitan John died.
YYY: What did the Mitpopolit do in an unbuilt hotel?
Zzzz is over.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №146872
 28.11.2017
Relationship Generations

In the country where I grew up, it is still common to have many children. Adult sons leave for salaries and with the help of parents acquire their housing, daughters are married to the groom's house, and the younger son remains to take care of the elderly, who brings the wife to their house. No one is jealous of this girlfriend.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №146871
 28.11.2017
Sugildiet gave an onion worth 15k rubles for a night of love. without a joke.
On the one hand, I’m happy for him :), and on the other... the word "fuck" played with new colors...

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №146870
 28.11.2017
I’m sitting in the army and watching a colleague’s album. It turned out that on the citizen he was such a gentle buckwolf under a hundred, and now only 60 kg.

He sees my amazement and begins to tell me.

"You know, when I was at the citizenship, my friends were constantly telling me, you eat so much, you need to lose weight. And I told them that I eat the same as everyone else and that I have a genetic predisposition. But shit, it turned out that I was effectively just dohuya eating.”

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №146869
 28.11.2017
And the EGE was not there then, and the elderly were respected and supported.

by Fuck. It also teaches. Respect for old age and childhood is entirely and entirely the blasphemy of modern consumer society (C), which is humane even to those who love to strike it from the height.
The glorious customs of mourning excessive mouths, old as well as young, with hunger, sending the grandmother-grandfather in the winter for the sickness, if only they did not return, the wonderful proverbs about the birth and the fatigue - this is our past, the sickness is not sickness.
No one wanted to walk after the infirmity, and respect for the elderly is in fact equal to respect for people 45-50 years old, already experienced and still strong.
That society is a utilitarian society, when there is no benefit from you, you are not needed. A multi-generational family in the same territory was the result of more burdens than the desire to take care of the first generation.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №146868
 28.11.2017
For me, greed is one of man’s most disgusting traits. My ex-husband was only pressing on my side, he rarely refused anything to himself. After my divorce, I learned that he earned twice as much as he told me, and for the rest lived with blackjack and prostitutes. And I, a naive fool, honestly pulled all my salary into the family budget. But from the budget I got only cheap cosmetics and cheap clothes, and there was no question of some kind of help to parents.

And here, to give my husband a cell phone for his birthday, I slowly began to collect the ass, I wanted to make him pleasant. I collected two-thirds of the amount, but my birthday was ahead (a month before its date), and I thought that the guests would give me the money, and I just got the necessary amount.

At the holiday table, my ex-husband solemnly handed me a envelope with money as a gift. I was in shock, as I was waiting, as usual, for a hug. I look into the envelope – and there’s just missing a third of the amount.

When the celebration ended and everyone broke up, I took the gifted envelope and used to fill my bag. What do I see there? The amount is less than the amount I hold in my hands.

He just took the money from my ass and gave it to me! There are no limits to human generosity.

P.S. I never bought the phone. A few days before his birthday, I picked up my bags and left for another city, which I have never regretted.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №146867
 28.11.2017
2018: eruption of a volcano on the island hurt, Russian tourists were blocked
Uvarov Fedy: The Island of Pain? It’s for masks, right?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №146866
 28.11.2017
From Habr:
I came up with a quantum algorithm to find the shortest path in a graph. Cheap and angry. On an element base available to any DIY adherent. We take a solder, wires and a set of low-power resistors. We spread a diagram in which the weight of the path is encoded by the resistance of the resistor. Cut 220 to the points between which we are looking for a path. Where you have drowned, there is the shortest path. Rapid action is amazing, complete parallelism.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №146865
 28.11.2017
xxx: All repairers are divided into three types:
The first after the repair are left with extra screws.
The others are not in excess.
And the third add their own screws to the place of the missing after the first type repairers.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №146864
 28.11.2017
At work, a new water was put into the refrigerator - by feelings: damaged. According to the label: mineral.
Paul of the office tried, one colleague drank the whole cup. We look at her suspiciously and broadcast about the standard 4 hours for poisoning.
Well, I don’t know, a properly spoiled soup works almost instantly!)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №146863
 28.11.2017
The future, the mill.
Yesterday a guy approached me and asked me to go online.

I split between two answers:
1) I am not going out. (I don’t smoke, but on the internet)
and
2) The show? Right here?? to

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №146862
 28.11.2017
RON: Well, it’s okay...Marketers, advertisers, advertisers...Everything has been done!
RON: Now there was a message from one online store, after the first reading, I wanted to get up, go to them to disassemble.
RON: Really burst out.
and Irina?
RON: The subject of the letter: "Ivan, we will charge you E-points."
by Irina :)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №146861
 28.11.2017
We will die and then rest.

Oh, would have lived.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №146860
 28.11.2017
On the job, we have a familiar Belarusian and he came to visit us, exchange experiences, etc.
One day in between we asked him about jokes about potatoes and Belarusians. They do, and they use and keep potatoes everywhere. He replied that it was nonsense, took a potato out of his pocket and threw the dog running by.
Then he admitted that he had cooked this joke all the way and had been walking with potatoes in his pocket for two days.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №146859
 28.11.2017
In Japan, old people were taken to the mountain and left to die there.
- Mr. Kudrin, will there be other proposals for the pension fund?

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