For what I love my girlfriend, it is for the ability to shake up with sudden SMS:

15:48 Dick is interested in the question: has the female consciousness been transferred into the male body, will she be able to manage them right away or not? There is the center of gravity of the other, and so on.
02:43 The bumping commands on the chicken legs can be considered as the simplest programming.) I just try to sleep.)
14:25 The ducks crossed my way. Are there any signs of this case?
03:08 What was the name of Brother Shao??? [A very important question in the middle of the night, especially given that the character was mentioned 1 time in all 4 volumes and without a name.]
Why is Jokonda a symbol of France and the Louvre, if the artist is an Italian?

What to do if you fell on the rails in the subway.
xxx: And a person with a radius of more than half a meter, it turns out, will not fit in a slope?
YYY: I understood everything, everything is planned! A person with a radius of half a meter will simply not pass through the turniket.

Yesterday, an event that broke the pattern. I go out for a walk with the dog, it is cold, dark, there is snow, at the entrance there is a typical Uzbek in a sportswear and a clothed hat. Trembling on the phone. And here I will stumble.
"... the erda is ten. Kerak olмок kursatikich sixteen-pointed key, da..."

zzz: Four hours of a very lengthy trial generate some skepticism about justice.

- Witness, you just said that the boss ordered you to transfer money, and it was a routine procedure.
Yes, it was so.
But stand up! Here in your testimony, given during the investigation, it says: “I transferred the money on the order of the accused, who threatened us with terrible penalties, I cried, the boss cried, everyone cried, but was transferred because they were afraid. And also he barmalayes and eats small children.
Hm... yes yes. All was so. This is a more accurate description.

Why do people get married?
Borst moves people.

And I’m curious – why is it – such a problem – to add a forum on debabals? so that they answer there. At least because it is never funny. And they need.
The answer is – go. Collect the Signatures

>>> and sad above all the fact that we have living conditions such that such people generally exist.

Now, let’s talk about living conditions. In all major cities, at least in our half-millionaire, there are centers of social adaptation of persons without a certain place of residence and occupation. Every boy knows about their existence and even sometimes appears there - to wash, sleep a couple of days and drop back on the street. Because in these centers you can’t drink and you need to work at least a little. Therefore, it is easier to dig up to the patrol that passes by than to squeeze to that center.
And in general, yes, sad that there are such people, but the conditions of life here absolutely have nothing to do with it.

I played the role of a villain with the task of stealing a bottle of toxic gas. The balloon stole, it is time to board the shuttle of emergency evacuation. I approach the shuttle landing compartment, there the mints whisper everybody. I cried, I thought, what should I do? Pumped the gas from a special balloon into a balloon with oxygen from the scavenger, passed the control. During the flight, I was suspected of something, arrested, placed in a prison compartment (the balloon remained at the place of arrest). Then the rabbits rebelled, took out the compartment, the rabbits fled. I rush to the balloon, and there is a deceased scientist sitting in a scavenger with my balloon connected in his hands. There was a surprise for him. This is the game, EFT.
Real freedom, and not "navel mouse- pressed".

I live in a dormitory. I decided one evening to eat something sweet, the good thing we have a buffet on the first floor. I go down to the buffet and it’s closed. Well, fig with him, I go back, and a girl of giant volumes descends on the stairs to meet me and recount the little things in the palm. Passing by, he thought to help, and shouted down, “The buffet is closed.” In response to “Have you choked?”

When I was 12, the whole small military town was shocked by the news – Larissa from the eighth is pregnant, and does not know which of the two. The school in the city is one, so about "the whole city" - not an exaggeration, and the times were such that a pregnant minor was an extremely rare and shocking case.

In general, even those parents who until recently were embarrassed to talk to puppies about pesticides and pineapples, understood: they will still have to. My mom, who even thought the word “shoulder” was terribly disgraceful, red and pale, told something about eggs and sperm, a neighbor, a lieutenant colonel, showed wisdom and organizational abilities and called a school teen doctor from a local clinic to read a lecture on scientific research.

In general, the story is not flaming, if not one "but". Twenty years have passed, and the same Larisa now leads a social organization that demands to ban sex education classes in schools because they corrupt children!

Jana Lisicina: Oh, I had a personal exhibition. And the journalist asked, “Who did you study with?” and “I am the schedule, for me Dürer is everything.” "Durero..." – I played my favorite song. "And in which university of Irkutsk he teaches?" asked the Journalist recording. “He no longer teaches, for he is dead,” I answered, and we mourned.

Life is a tragedy for those who live by feelings, a comedy for fools, and a farce for those who live by reason.

The Bank. The evening. There are 10 minutes until the end of the day. There are no clients, the hall is empty, the girls behind the stands are already at a low start, all the documents are counted and picked up. And then a messy client enters the room. I was in a hurry to close the bank. He runs to the box, where the loans are paid, and cries:
The girl! You are... find me!
The girl behind the stand blows him with a sad look and gives:
So hide...

It’s funny that Zaldostanov is a murderer of the USSR, in which a guy who doesn’t work anywhere on an American bike, and disguised as a frightener, would sit in jail.

The Distractor.
This reminds me of an anecdote:
Grandma calls the police and says
- I see from the window a young couple in their apartment doing obscene things in the neighboring house!!! to
Police are arriving
Grandma, I see nothing.
If you go into the closet, you can see it all!! to

So dissatisfied with the fact that those who dared to dress up in the dressing room and dared to dry their hair, not wanting to wet their clothes, resemble that grandmother.

Stupid people, when I lie down on your face while sleeping, it means I want to eat. Not only do you live on my square, you sleep when you need to feed me.

and your cat.

Democracy is when two wolves and a lamb vote for a meal. Freedom is when a well-armed lamb challenges the outcome of such a vote.
Benjamin Franklin

Good time of day.
Do you have any more problems in life, only to dig in to greetings?

and yesterday. At work, the advertising manager needed to insert an illustration in the Word document (already ready) - an approximate sample of the advertising layout to send to a potential customer.
She asked to do this to our brilliant editor, designer, and just light.
Svetch squeezed with thin shoulders and asked: "Is it possible in principle to infuse a picture into a text document?"
I warned you not to rush!
"Nothing is complicated. You print your picture and the document you need to send. You cut the layout, paste in the word print, scan - here is the word page in electronic form!"

How to live further? My ass is pretty bad at 50 years of age...but I’ve been doing sports all my life and everything is OK from the back...now I’ll be afraid to turn my face to the ladies in the dressing room, suddenly who am I offending with wrinkles? You don’t pump your face, it’s not shit.