bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №121473
 06.12.2015
On a federal message, Deputy Fyodorov sits surrounded by CIA agents – iron-cut people, I would have already crossed them all with a fork from the buffet.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №121472
 06.12.2015
Do you think that two-thirds of our lives are seen on the screen?
YYY: I was thinking about it, yes. It is a bit scary.
YYY: Our interface is not eyes and ears, but a comp monitor. We are cyborgs.
The computers have enslaved us!
Congratulations to Neo

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121471
 06.12.2015
Omelette with spinach and brie cheese

I grew up in a village in the suburbs of Moscow a decorative plant called "holes". from the Soviet years. And one day my future wife came there, saw fresh grounds, and with the screams "oh, spinach! I could have eaten a couple" on them.
I am for what? Not everything is exotic with a foreign name.

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №121470
 06.12.2015
The husband yesterday connected the dishwasher, took a moth of flaxseed, looked at it and suddenly issued, from Yesenin: "With a snop of your oat hair, you dreamed of me forever..."

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121469
 06.12.2015
The Coca-Cola cowboys are gone! New year soon.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №121468
 06.12.2015
The husband when feeding the kitten (and they run around him and mock and jump) screams at the whole apartment: I don't see your LAAAPs!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №121467
 06.12.2015
And “Seven Fridays a Week” is quickening every night, right?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №121466
 06.12.2015
Once upon a time, a group of SOBR capture came to a barrier in the apartment. The door is metal, massive. He is locked there. They started this door with a Bulgarian, they look, and the cuts are tightened from the back. So this bargain turned on the welding machine and let the door be welded. The Soviets were of course shocked by such a greed, but eventually guessed to cut off the light.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №121465
 06.12.2015
An 55-year-old woman, the mother of three programmers, asks someone who is not psychotic to teach her the internet.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №121464
 06.12.2015
(The news)

"Rospotrebnadzor advises not to go abroad for the New Year"

So far, I’m just advising... Okay.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №121463
 06.12.2015
In the ass of traffic junk, electric forever!
Traffic in the ass? A strange desire.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №121462
 06.12.2015
The employee (C) comes with the words: "Dubes (local psycho) disbanded!"
I (compassionately) "Yes, when I go out, I’m always convinced"
C: The truth has been dissolved. There are no doctors, no sanitarians, no one to work, everyone was sent home.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121461
 05.12.2015
I read Tura Hayerdahl "Ra". The ocean, a boat of papyrus, a storm, a broken steering wheel, a carried wheel, a sailing vessel that pulled water...
How delightful to experience all this, relaxed lying on the couch and with a candy in your mouth.

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121460
 05.12.2015
If, let’s say, our soldier is wounded, if he gets ill, if little happened or killed, don’t give God, then it can be determined by him where he is, because it is transmitted through our home GLONASS.

ZZZ is yes. End of the wolves, wear a bracelet on your leg and try to run after the wolves.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121459
 05.12.2015
I grew up in a family with a diabetic father. Since childhood, I know that the smell of acetone from daddy is very bad, you need to take urgent measures so that a coma does not occur.

On the other day I go on a bus from work and I feel from the lady standing next to a familiar disturbing smell... Here she probably surprised when I started to blow her ice cream and persuade her to immediately sit down. And the fault itself, I think, was nothing to buy a liquid to remove the lacquer with acetone, and even in a glass bubble!

[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121458
 05.12.2015
The logic of a normal motorcyclist is this: the flow due to the load stretches at a speed of 40 on a section with a permissible 80, so why plunge 40 with all, if 80 can be lavaged between the machines. The total blame of the motorcyclists is nonsense. Simply put, they are more likely to break apart from idiots in canned banks.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

If the purpose of life is to break, then everything is done right. I just met that recently on the third. The unpleasant place, the connection of roads in the form of the letter X, everything is actively rebuilt, I hear - flying. They are not visible, so they are accustomed to focusing on sound. I drive the car further to the right, exactly - stops because of the rear left neighbor, also bended to the steering wheel, so that exactly before time did not notice. At full speed, he enters the hole left by me and goes away. Within a minute I pass by – it rolls, fit into the back of Ferrari. You see, the idiot in the box didn’t have time to turn away, a shit like that.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №121457
 05.12.2015
Take a picture of a cute cat:
Unfortunately not mine.
Why don’t you want your house? All your peers have long run their cats, you are still without a cat, and then it will be too late!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №121456
 05.12.2015
The government loves long-distance drivers, but somehow platonically.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №121455
 05.12.2015
I saw a quote about 1024 likes... and below 1023 likes to him. How not to fix this situation.)

Wow: I saw a quote about 1024 likes... and below 1025 likes to it. I also couldn’t go by without fixing the situation. ( by

[ + 30 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121454
 05.12.2015
Please enter your password.
and avothuy.
So I am afraid we can’t help you.
It is a password.

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