bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 45 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73654
 01.12.2012
I raised my eyebrows and went to bed. I woke up in the morning, one of my eyebrows broke. I decided to break. I cut off both my eyebrows with my own... Fuck, I’d better build my brains.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №73653
 01.12.2012
When I slipped to work today past the school, I watched the picture of boys from the upper classes, crushing the snow in front of the school, cheering that they had canceled physics...)))

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №73652
 01.12.2012
I know for sure that there are two kinds of creatures that are drawn to shit: the flies and the journalists.
Joseph of Egypt

[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №73651
 01.12.2012
In the late 1990s, a young mechanic worked at an electric company in Detroit for $11 a week. He worked 10 hours a day, and when he returned home, he often worked at noon at his barracks, trying to invent a new type of engine.
His father thought that the guy was wasting his time in vain, neighbors called him crazy, no one believed that anything would come out of these activities. Nobody but his wife.
She helped him work at night, holding a kerosene lamp over his head for several hours. Her hands bleaked, her teeth knocked from the cold, she got a cold, but... She believed so much in her husband!!! Years later there was a noise from Sarai. Neighbors saw a man and his wife on the road without a horse in the same chariot. His name was Henry Ford.
When, in an interview with Ford, a journalist asked what Ford would like to be in another life, the genius replied simply, "Whoever... only if my wife was next to me."

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73650
 01.12.2012
The whole day on TV shows disasters, murders, violence. And the cartoon “Well, guess!” You can only watch it after 23:00. The wolf is smoking.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №73649
 01.12.2012
Q: Who are you studying with?
At the pathologist.
and = )
Chapter 8: Suddenly
Q: Why did you choose that?
As a doctor, it is a great responsibility.
UUU: And there is work with fabrics and quiet quiet work.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73648
 01.12.2012
The dialogue:
I opened the Word file with Excel, what am I doing wrong?
Open the Word file with Excel.
Aaa... I understand. thank you.

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73647
 01.12.2012
Dear Father Christmas!

Please take the deer from the Shcherbinsk administration, which destroy the groves grown by the inhabitants of the city and put advertising shields in their place. You can even plant them in your eagle’s straw. I am not against)

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №73646
 01.12.2012
xxx: What would you advise from the weapon, which would be loaded in the knee so that he will never forget, and not to make noise?
yyy: I recommend onions or arbalets. The arrow in the knee changes people very much.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №73645
 01.12.2012
The threshold could be completed in two weeks, not three months. The whole problem lies in a single bug that makes the program not work as it should. But it is impossible to eliminate it, because the bug is the boss, with its constantly changing illogical and contradictory demands.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №73644
 01.12.2012
References to the camera:
Real zooming in the range of 10 - 15, further software scam. Working in the macro mode is not convenient, the supermacro mode is not necessary at all, you can only take a photo of the fly in this mode by tapping on the lens.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №73643
 01.12.2012
I’m sitting in the kitchen with a buck in the back, something whispering...fuck, pelmeni...

R. S. Feed the cat.

P.S to P.S Pay for the Internet! (30.11.2012)

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №73642
 01.12.2012
In the forum:
Only do not bend the wire strongly, or the electrons will not fit in the turn and get stuck in the insulation.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №73641
 01.12.2012
I have a stock of work.
yyy: I wait I don't know what to do and what to get and so I sit dumb
Yyy: I have panic attacks

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №73640
 01.12.2012
News from Yandex:

XHH: Did you hear, the figures of the robberies in the Peter’s housing system were taken to Moscow?

YYYYYYYYYYYYY Sophia is fucking. Exchanging experience with our colleagues in Moscow.

[ + 47 - ] [11 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73639
 01.12.2012
The first snowy day of winter is the uncomfortable moment when you realize that the swarm you have just passed has gone and is trying to go somewhere.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №73638
 01.12.2012
I go home from the universe, in front of my dad with my daughters. One is 5-6 years old, the other is a teenager.
The elderly enthusiastically tells about the last part of Sumerek, apparently from the movie. The father asks the younger:
Cold, who do you like more? Vampires or Reverse?
and none. I love zombies more. and other Greek nuts. They are similar to brains.

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