bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №121873
 16.12.2015
Another wise man, a fool.

Chlamydomonas, that’s what’s left of you after communicating with the Egyptian queen :)

Chlamydia is water. Chlamydia does not cause chlamydia.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №121872
 16.12.2015
Grey is the man who invented to drink tea with a bergamot!
All the Tea

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №121871
 16.12.2015
XX: Have a fun game
YYY: I am not playing
XXX: Are you watching the series?
YYY: No
XXX: I am not distracted
YYY: From what, a man-bred?

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №121870
 16.12.2015
Listening to the trolleybus:
Address to the child:
How old are you?
Three fingers.


[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №121869
 16.12.2015
A grandmother calls us somehow to the clinic and asks for a doctor, whom she only remembers externally. According to the description, we understand what doctor, we say that the doctor has a change on another day and his name is Gennady Albertovich Katz. For the accuracy of the name record, we dictate "Constantin, Alexander, circus". The grandmother thanks, puts on the phone and calls again in a minute. The same grandmother calls and says:" tell me, and when does Konstantin Alexandrovich Circus work?"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №121868
 16.12.2015
And what, did he get divorced?
Tim: Yes
Why did he decide to do so under the GN?
I decided to give myself a gift.
by Tim : )

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №121867
 16.12.2015
> sympathized with the dark side?

How did you get it... the wrong word "sympathy", not "pot"!! to

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121866
 16.12.2015
All the flies were once bees. But they quickly realized that the shit was much bigger than the flower pollen.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №121865
 16.12.2015
A romantic evening. Wine with light. The preliminary lust. I am so passionate. A few days ago, she wrapped up a bunch of African chopsticks and, so as not to bother them, tied them in a high bunch on a mouthpiece. A kiss after a kiss – and I hear a silent voice:
I need something to confess to you.
I was stressed.
I... the thing is... I’ve never loved Chipolino before.
The curtain.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №121864
 16.12.2015
For fifteen years I and my co-workers said that the bosses are stupid fools, and I finally became the boss. And now I can’t forget how my former bosses controlled this herd of lambs and didn’t kill anyone.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №121863
 16.12.2015
Go to us, we have cookies! The dark side.
The old trick of the dark side – “we have cookies” does not mean “we will give you cookies.”
Cookies do not give – they are taken by force.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №121862
 16.12.2015
xxx: we are reviewing documents on the part of technical policy by Alice Selezneva and Fedor Konyukhov
yyy: myelofon - a great help in reviewing documents of technicians

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №121861
 16.12.2015
The world has become better.
Now, people go into the store and say:"Hello."
When I was a child, when I went into the store, they said, “Who is the last?”

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №121860
 16.12.2015
The unexpected consequence of the return of electricity to the Crimea: from the sleep-out came Mužik-s-Drelju.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №121859
 16.12.2015
This is a famous eastern diva! and Moni Cabeluchi.
Q: Have you heard of her? She has very expressive eyes!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121858
 16.12.2015
Oh my God, my God!! to
The most important and urgent news this morning:
Scientists have found that cats and dogs lace water differently!
The world is saved!!! to
:D

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №121857
 16.12.2015
The younger daughter that their school Christmas tree this year is under great question. For security reasons. And then, you understand, will come instead of Santa Claus some Colotun-Baby with a shachid beard and a plastic bag.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №121856
 16.12.2015
My name is Oleg Valeryevich. A client from a distant village calls, the connection is disgusting.
Hi Oleg Viktorovich
I am Valeryevich.
and oh! Valery Illich

Wow: At work, the phones are parallel to half the floor after re-planning. The phone rings, the phone is picked up by a random employee in a random room. A very nervous man requires Yevgeny Konstantinovich and can not even formulate who he is, where he is from and on what issue, only an oret. It was fortunate that Gennady Konstantinovich and Yevgeny Petrovich were sitting in the same room, somehow sharing this pepper among themselves.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №121855
 15.12.2015
Mimocrocodile: Oh, I look at what our students are studying in nuclear energy, and I quietly dream of moving, preferably to another planet. - ~ ~ ~ ~
ak: Believe me, it’s not worth it – I know those who have to build these stars. Better to explode on the spot.

[ + 25 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121854
 15.12.2015
I love Russia, it looks like a post-apocalyptic world. Everyone has tablets, headphones and other gadgets, and around the shit and bad roads.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna