bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121713
 13.12.2015
On the Day of the Constitution of Russia, police detained one of the creators of this Constitution, Georgi Satarov.

I want likes, that’s funny.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №121712
 12.12.2015
to this:
And what is incomprehensible in the criterion: "animal must be either domestic or dead"?

It is unclear in this criterion to whom it owes so much.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №121711
 12.12.2015
XXX: Where to Go
YYY: Nothing
XXX: You are not allowed there.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №121710
 12.12.2015
A few years ago, I agreed with a neighbor that on New Year’s Eve he would come in, whisper and leave gifts under the tree for my children. And here is the hour of the night, I lay the children and say that you need to at least pretend to sleep in order for Santa Claus to come. We all fell to bed and pretended we were sleeping. We hear the door open, someone enters, says something and leaves, and when we leave the bedroom, we see gifts under the tree. If I hadn’t organized it myself, I would have believed it.) Children have emotions and miracles!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №121709
 12.12.2015
In what pork farms do you live, that you need towels at home?

And why just a pork, other options do not come to mind? For example, we do not have carpets and paths on the floor in order to save effort when cleaning. And barefoot on linoleum to walk cold, batteries barely warm.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №121708
 12.12.2015
Canakau: What would you change if you went back to the past?
The diamond: rubles

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121707
 12.12.2015
XX: I have been working in one place for a long time. Axiom can be said.
YYY: Judging from what I know, you’re not Aksakal, you’re Saxaul.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121706
 12.12.2015
Well, you can soak up.
Are you talking about Mantoux or do you have a murder license?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №121705
 12.12.2015
I read, "In Peter in closed museums is stored the poof of Tsar Nicholas...".
Figase, a quantum poach that can be stored in several museums at once! And why does this Nicholas have such a foolish name, King?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №121704
 12.12.2015
As we go to personalities:

>>> I understand the paths that these long-range fighters have been paved by the long-range fighters themselves.

Start with the fact that the roads are not only used by long-range fighters, this time, and secondly, buying anything, it is you, one way or another, will pay for the roads on which your goods were brought, regardless of whether they were built by the state or long-range fighters personally. So that.

As long as, in our country, all roads are built for our money (budget) and including all the garbage in the roads are cleaned for our money, I personally do not throw the garbage, but it is touched, I turn to you the bastard who throws the garbage, I do not want to pay for your garbage.

And especially fun when it is written that a bridge or road or school is built with the support of the ER))) are they kind of rushed? Have we allocated our budget money for this?

We pay for everything, it is time to start taking care of our property.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121703
 12.12.2015
Have you borrowed 1904, have you not eaten the ears there? The one to whom you answered wrote that a child, for example, who lost his parents and lived together with his grandmother in retirement would be more pleased with candy and food than you, the chewed cheeks, for whom the phone is not a luxury and the car is a means of transportation. And the younger for the older clothes to wear fast. This is from your creation =(( You are probably a member.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121702
 12.12.2015
The Apostle Andrew fished from the marsh.
The Savior walked on the water.
And Andrei got the sandstorms out of the water.
DDD: There is no spoil here.
And Andrew shouted – where did he go? I remember he was in the song.
FFF: And the Saviour replied – calm Andrei, just further I forgot the song.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №121701
 12.12.2015
xxx: "Wodka, which was left for only one day, was enough for 8 days."
YYY: How is it? I understand when a vodka stocked for a week ended in a day, but how a one-day vodka was enough for 8 days?! to
xxx: Hanukkah

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №121700
 12.12.2015
I don’t know if it’s a laser or a jet printer, maybe 3D.
You need 3D glasses.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №121699
 12.12.2015
to this:
A strange winter today in Nuremberg. and a month (!) I can’t sell skies on Avita, where the world goes.

Go to Siberia. I have created.
Your Santa

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №121698
 12.12.2015
(From discussion of upcoming corporations.)
E.L.: With your work, it’s best to just set yourself on fire and say it’s a Phoenix costume. Then burn it all around and take it to sunset.

[ + 19 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121697
 12.12.2015
Well, I understand buying grenades for illegal ammunition, but the rest of the bullet to cover it is somewhat burning.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №121696
 12.12.2015
I met a girl. She is so strange. I invite her to the movie - she comes with a girlfriend, I invite her to a restaurant, to a club, to a barbecue - the same picture. I will probably break up with her.

Don’t be a fool, you invite her to sex, you won’t regret it.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №121695
 12.12.2015
My mother is a fairly modern person, who went on to advertise iPhones and regularly buys the latest, which was the result of our regular holiwares.
Doctors have found that the Apple 6 device contains nickel – one of the strongest allergens among metals
WOW: I still love him.
HH: What am I here? Just interesting facts from Wikipedia.
xxx: if the skin starts to itch-turn the phone in a plastic pocket, as you remember, we turned the controller
You will become a Moscow legend.
The grandmother with the last iPhone wrapped in a bag

[ + 22 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121694
 12.12.2015
Grassnake: A few years ago, a friend working at a state machinery factory cast a spade. of titanium. The whole.
No, seriously - a full-size titanium shovel.
I even took it from the factory.
The greatest thing! It is light, sharp and durable.
A couple of months ago he broke it. I still haven’t been able to answer the question – how?! to

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