bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №157659
 22.02.2022
xxx: I have long hair (under the waist) and I am beautiful. Not everything is so unambiguous :)

yyy: I also have hair below my waist, but my wife is constantly asking me to shave it.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №157658
 22.02.2022
Public opinion is foolishness accepted by the majority.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №157657
 22.02.2022
One day my son came from school. He says he is new in his class. A very unusual guy, as it turned out. The story begins with a mystery:
"Tell me, can it be that the boy has no mother, but has two fathers and one of them pays the other alimony?
E-E, I was so confused. The two fathers who...
The Son:
No, they are not gay!
In silence I say:
I give up! Tell me!
She learned that the mother of this new man at one time divorced from his father, married another, and then swintled in an unknown direction, leaving both the then husband and the child from the first marriage. Her son lived with her father. And his real biological father supports the second husband of his former financially, paying him the legal alimony!
Life is a very strange thing...

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №157656
 22.02.2022
“We’re going to urinate.
They are tired of swallowing dust!
The mouth will be broken - the teeth will be knocked out!
I like it, I don’t like it, I love it, my sweetheart.
“The boy said, the boy did!”
...
Is it intercepting a conversation of some bandit OPG?
How to say...

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №157655
 21.02.2022
That is, the brain is... we...

And all the rest of meat is just a biomechanical scapander?

Any beautiful girl is like that.

She has a beautiful scarf.



YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY It would be so simple. The endocrine system in everything from the intestines to the ankles and thyroid has a formative and basic effect on what we call our personality.



Zzz: But in fact, is it all controlled by the brain?

So I also think that we are just gray matter in the meat exoskeleton.



ddd: The glands have thrown a cocktail of hormones, and here’s another wing around the wall ready to break up for the sake of “they themselves.” Another throw – and here the all-controlling brain clones into sleep.)

In addition to psychologists, there are also psychiatrists who either repair biochemistry or help to fit into the norm.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №157654
 21.02.2022
You can get out of any labyrinth. You just need a staircase.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №157653
 21.02.2022
I worked in the local library for several years. Almost everyone has ever been a debtor in a library. We had to constantly call them and remind them. One day my boss called high school students, who were very many. We usually look at the name and then type the number. A 15-year-old student talks about this:
Hi to you! Can I go to the phone?
Hi to you! Alicia is not at home.
Are you Alyssa’s mother?
I am a grandmother...
You know, your grandson owes a lot of books to the library number 170. Need to surrender urgently!
At the other end of the pipe pause, and then confused and frightened:
Julia, is it you?! to
My boss called home and talked to her mother about her son.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №157652
 21.02.2022
I do not understand why the photo of a cute and sexy girl on the backdrop of a cult structure, insults the feelings of believers, and the fattening shoulder of the pop with the dear Mercedes on the same background - does not insult.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №157651
 20.02.2022
XXX: This is not serious. In the elevator you need to enter with a shotgun forward, before throwing a grenade there. Suddenly, there was a madman hiding there.



YYYY :

Throwing a grenade

by @@

I entered with a shotgun.

by @@

The doors closed

by @@

The grenade exploded.



Zzz: The grenade killed the crazy as planned

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №157650
 20.02.2022
I had a date with a girl, walked a little and decided to go to the cafe, and there military pilots celebrate the day of aviation (the day of receipt). And so it turned out that in addition to my girlfriend, other girls/women, except the waitresses, were not in the cafe. They sat down, ate, drank a little and at the end of the evening she said, "What a good place here, what a male flowery, I'll go here!“”

[ + 25 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №157649
 20.02.2022
The minimum pension is paid to those who lived fairly. and vice versa.

© by

[ + 33 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №157648
 20.02.2022
Nothing gives a neofit among fans in figure skating like the phrase "Look, she's only 15, and she's already jumping four!"

I will remind those who are far from all this - the figurist has a special moment in their development, what in the English-speaking world is called sweet spot. This is the age when their physical condition already allows them to push well, but puberty has not yet arrived, and the body is still childish - light and compact. The effect is stronger if the girl is small.

In most girls, the body begins to change at 13-15 years of age - they gain weight, change shapes, there is a hormonal shift, affecting the body. And in psychology. For many caregivers, their careers end here, and they never go into adult sports. But it happens that puberty comes later - in this period, 15-16, less often than 17 years, they as figurants come to the peak of their shape. At this point, if they are well prepared, they can jump three quadrades (fourths) per performance. Then, of course, nature will take its own, and at 18, this same girl will not be able to jump four at all. This achievement is temporary.

Ethery Tutberidze, of course, is an outstanding coach, but the essence of her approach is to find such girls, to drag them as much as possible for a specific age, and then, when the figure begins to change - to throw them out for a wash. In the language of figure skating, it sounds like “passing to another coach.” What else can they do if they can’t do anything anymore. At the age of eighteen, are you still on the side?

The first was Yulia Lipnitskaya. And as a success - the peak of her shape came at the Olympics in Sochi, where she became a champion in team competitions. Lipnitskaya was then 15, and the domestic media just went crazy in search of epithetics capable of expressing their enthusiasm. The most usable was “genial” in all sorts of variations. It is July 23 and not everyone even remembers it anymore.

Do you know what happened after the Olympics? If not, I will tell you. Lipnitskaya began puberty, she gained weight, the proportions changed. On this background, a conflict developed with Tutberidze, and she left Urmanov. However, it could no longer reach its former form. This led to a nervous breakdown, depression and an attempt to lose weight at any cost. As a result - anorexia, from which she was treated for three months in a clinic in Europe. Then she decided to end her career. She was 19 years old at the time.

After Lipnitskaya was Medvedev, then Zagitova. Both were also classified as "geniuses", both have already completed their careers. If so, I am 19 years old. Then came the line of "genial" Trussova and Shcherbakova. At 17, they continue to perform, but the status of the main genius has already passed to Valyeva. However, for a short time - in six months, Sophie Akatyeva will be 14, she will be admitted (likely) to the PR and this fairy tale about the white bull will start again.

As you can see, the "genius" on the pedestals are replaced with kaleidoscopic speed. This is literally a caliph for an hour. The time of your light is two years. If you have Olympics, you are lucky. Records of the past in the number of victories (Slutskaya won the European Championship 7 times, Sonja Heny and Katarina Witt - six) are now impossible. It was all in quads. As long as you can jump them, you are interested in someone.

But this is only the top of the iceberg. Below, there, under the burning stars in an instant - dozens of girls who will never get their chance because they have not had time to get to the necessary level before puberty. Their fate does not care anyone at all. But many of them would have been more bright if they had given them time.

In addition to the understandable ethical problem, this entire conveyor is provoking something more serious, close to crime. Young bodybuilders’ coaches are very tempted to expand this sweet spot to get more time to prepare. This can be done in two ways - by accelerating muscle building in the "girl" age and postponing the onset of puberty. Unfortunately, modern pharmacology is able to "help" in both cases.

I’m not going to blame anyone, but it’s obvious that sooner or later this gun will shoot. In fact, the accusations in this already spread, but the scandals have gone. Although specifically for Tutberidze, this does not make much sense - it is easier for her to change girls, like gloves, sending the mature to the landfill of the history of figure skating.

But in my opinion, this system is deeply vicious and you need to send it to the landfill. In the summer, the issue of raising the age limit for figurists to 17 years will be discussed. In my opinion, we need to go even further, and prohibit participation in adult competitions until 18. For adult women to compete with each other, and no one had the incentive to ruin their lives. It is then that we will see real, not momentary, geniuses, then there will be real legends that do not exist now. Only then will it become clear who has the technique and artistic, and who has just puberty delayed.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №157647
 20.02.2022
I am concerned about the promotion of non-traditional values in our society.
Lovers of torture, bribery, wars, murders and landings of innocent people, multinationals, corruptors negatively affect the spiritual and moral state of society.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №157646
 19.02.2022
The official, who instead of “the cow” says “big cattle,” should not be called “man,” but “fat talk primate.”

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №157645
 19.02.2022
For many years, writer Samuel Langhorne Clemens - Mark Twain - was the world's most famous American, much more famous than the American president.
Tourists came to America to watch the Niagara Falls and writer Mark Twain.
Mark Twain, because of his, though sharp, but often long language, not once had to take challenges for a duel. Fortunately, everything ended well, both for Twain and his opponents.
One day, during a duel with the editor of a newspaper, Twain, who had never held a gun in his hands until that day, asked his second to show him "how it is done."
The second, a great shooter, without targeting, shot the bird that flew high in the sky.
A dead bird fell to the legs of an enemy preparing for a duel.
He looked at the bird first, and then on Twain, and asked the second, "Who did this?"
“Twen,” he replied. "You can't fight this man," said the frightened editor to his second, "it would be a suicide!" and, dropping the gun, he took an uneven step toward the standing Twain to ask him to accept his apologies.
On the day of his funeral, his contemporary, Wilber Nesbit, would say, “The only sorrow that Mark Twain has caused the world is that he is dead.”

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №157644
 19.02.2022
If Putin wants to invade, it is necessary now, while the earth is frozen. Who will let him go afterwards?

[ + 9 - ] Comment quote №157643
 18.02.2022
Skill is a realized talent.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №157642
 18.02.2022
Not always the heroes are those who sharply shoot the enemy. Sometimes a hero can become a military who refused to obey an order. This is the story of a general who became a hero because he refused to fight.

In the first photo below is the hero of the Kursk Arc and many other key battles of the Second World War, Lieutenant General Matthew Shaposhnikov. But his name entered history not because he bravely fought under Kursk, and not because his brigade first forced Dnieper. His main feat was and will forever remain the refusal to shoot a peaceful demonstration of workers in Novocherkassk in June 1962. Despite the repeated orders of the chiefs to shoot at demonstrators on the bridge across the Tuslov River, Shaposhnikov categorically prohibited subordinate tankers and motorcars to open fire. “I don’t see in front of me such an enemy that should be attacked by our tanks,” he replied to Mikoyan, a member of the Politburo of the CPSU Central Committee, and switched off the raid.

Workers of the Novocherkassk power plant went on a demonstration because the day before they were announced a reduction in wages by 30 percent, at the same time the radio an increase in the price of products in the USSR by 30 percent too. On their way to the CPSU, the demonstrators carried posters with Lenin’s portraits and communist slogans.

The only “crumble” slogan was the poster “Khrushchev – on sausage!” When the gunmen who guarded the hill opened fire on the people, Shaposhnikov tried to stop the slaughter, but these shooters were personally ordered by the district commander General Pliev and the shooting continued until the square was literally overwhelmed by bodies of men, women and children. It was almost a complete analogue of the Nicholas Bloody Sunday. One of the junior officers, realizing the scale of the tragedy, immediately shot himself on the square.

Shaposhnikov was dismissed from the army for not obeying the order and expelled from the CPSU, but after that he began to spread letters with information about the Novocherkas tragedy in the country and the world. Thanks to him, the shootings of workers were learned abroad.

The party is transformed into a car driven by a bad driver, often drunk violating the rules of street traffic. It is time for this driver to take away the rights and thus prevent the disaster.”

It is extremely important for us now that the working people and the industrial intellectuals understand the essence of the political regime in which we live. They must understand that we are under the worst form of self-government, relying on enormous bureaucratic and armed force.”

“We need people to think instead of the blind faith that turns us into living machines. “Our people, in short, have become a politically unrighteous international fool, as they have never been.”

These words sentenced him to a long opal and even prison. Shaposhnikov was accused of treason to his homeland, and only thanks to the patronage of Marshal Malinovsky, who fought with him on the Kursk Arc, the charges were lifted. All his life the general executed himself for not turning his weapons against the murderers in military uniform and not standing on the side of the workers. He was the only Russian officer who refused to shoot at his own people.

General Lieutenant Shaposhnikov survived the Soviet Union, was fully rehabilitated and in his last years great respect from colleagues and residents of Novocherkassk. He remained in the people's memory as a war hero who for the first time in his life refused to execute an order. The one who did not shoot.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №157641
 18.02.2022
In Kiev, the wind is northeastern, the probability of Putin’s invasion is 30-35%, feels as 95-146%

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №157640
 17.02.2022
XXX: I was so forgotten that in the morning, when I put a turkey with coffee on the plate, I only remembered it in the evening. But because I forgot to turn on the tiles, it all went.

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