As a child, I walked around the area. The neighboring street was repaired, and all the old road signs were removed into one pile. We folded two pairs of signs "Entry into the residential zone" / "End of the residential zone" and "Peak passage". The “residential zone” was wrapped with wire to the well-standing lighting pillars at the entrances to our yard, which connects two parallel streets. As we thought, the cars that passed through our courtyard became smaller. The signs of the "Peak Crossing" we made on a narrow street near our yard. Where a pedestrian path crossed her.
18 years have passed. This year the building and the street were renovated. All of our voluntarily installed road signs were replaced with new ones, they were placed on normal columns, painted with reflective paint, and under the signs of the "Peak Transit" the zebra was also drawn.

The fact of Sal. People who eat fat are much less likely to have the desire to explode themselves in the middle of a busy street.

This is a nice child, and I am an adult aunt, I went to the sanatorium with a child for 10 years. In the Sanatorium library was held a literary victory for children. All participants were awarded prizes at the end of the contest, which included: an album, colored pencil, a magnetic with views of mountains and the sea... and balls. Ordinary balls are not inflated.

The children gave their prizes to their parents, they are dissatisfied, because they did not need this victory, they were cut off from their phones, the moms are dissatisfied, because the children are dissatisfied.

Here I say to my son: Do you know that?

I take the ball, blow it up, stretch the hole for air input. The air comes out of the ball with such a loud, penetrating pig whisper.

All the children were resurrected.

The whole sanatorium.

In the evening at dinner, the elderly neighbors at the table (he is a retired general, she is his most intelligent wife) say: a nightmare like today, whispered all day, until the head got sick.

And then my son proudly declares: It is my mother taught everyone!

From Reddit.



What was the worst thing women did on a first date with you?



Yyy: She literally asked what they have the most expensive alcohol here. The waitress exchanged views with me and included the male solidarity. He always said that everything he asked was over. May God bless him wherever he is. I came back to give him tea, but he refused.

We live in America. I cooked some borscht. The child liked.

-And maybe tomorrow I go to school to take it for lunch, only you just pour me a soup, with suspicious enthusiasm asked the son. No problem, they were poured into a plastic box, handed over to school.

He comes from school and is so happy. We ask how things are.

"My friends asked me at lunch what soup it was, I replied that it wasn't soup, just we in Russia love to eat bull blood and started breaking borscht with a spoonful.

- Friends for neighboring tables fled and they were almost tired, he joyfully finished the story.

I start the computer today. And I pay attention to the characteristic sound of Winchester’s heads knocking. Whoever has died in this way will understand. The computer loads from the SSD, and the data is stored on the screws. I gradually sit down, pre-infarct state, the computer starts, the sound does not stop. I feverily check all the disks, they recall. The cognitive dissonance. I’m going to remove the side cover from the system and I see behind the wire hanging from the table, which periodically gets into the power unit fan and the fan spots create this characteristic ringing sound.

Make a fool pray, and he will jump into the pit.

A little about tea

Worked in an expedition on a distant Arctic island (I will not reveal the details, because. All participants are still alive and can wash their neck for disclosure. The island is small, people 15 people, dining room in a large tent. The main group works near the camp, with several people, including me, riding routes across the island. We meet for breakfast and dinner. One of the central figures of the expedition (in addition to the boss, of course) is the mechanic Serega. It depends on the work of the diesel, the heat in the bath, and generally he is responsible for everything that should spin and emit heat and electricity. The mechanic has passed several drifting stations in the Arctic, worked more than once in Antarctica, character has a fun Nordic and calm, like his tractor DT-75. It is very difficult to irritate him, to cause an explosion - it is impossible, so the prolonged position war began completely unexpectedly - it turned out that he and I gently loved carcade tea. This wonderful drink (who tea, who compot) I loved because in its hot form its noble acid with sugar rejuvenated remarkably after heavy routes along the tundra. A similar effect on me was only produced by a thick barley barley, but in such a high latitude in the Arctic it was no longer found. Why the carcade loved the mechanic remained a mystery, apparently it was a simple true love that is inexplicable. The problem was that the carcade in our stocks was little, and Seregha had a priority, because it was not enough. He was the Chief Mechanic, and I was just a geologist. We drank carcade only in the evenings, strictly counting the leaves in someone else’s cup, but it didn’t get more of it... The stockpiles of the noble drink were evaluated by our cook in the week of its consumption by the whole composition. I had to temporarily unite with the mechanic and intimidate everyone else so that the carcade could not even dream. The period increased to 2.5 weeks, but on the backdrop of two months of work, this did not save the situation. Coincidence helped...

At the opposite end of the island was an abandoned polar station, the extensive warehouse of which we sometimes visited. In the 10 years after its closure, no one was there except the white bears. Even the ships did not enter here – far and icy. Therefore, with sufficient persistence, a lot of interesting things could be found. Here Serega once and once found... Bringing to the camp from the polar two barrels, liters each. We open for dinner one - dried onion. Urrra, now everything will taste three times better! Open the second – there is the carcade! No one even had time to kick, Serega immediately embraced the barrel: “My!” He nobly gave me all the supplies of our carcade and honestly made his only from a barrel. The smell of his drink was a little strange, but its color was even thicker than my, which Seregu was very pleased with. The mechanic swallowed the drink almost with cages, the leaves ate everything (as I did). The only thing that bothered him was that there was not the same acid, but everyone understood that for tea, which had been lying in a barrel among the bears for 10 years, it was probably normal. The rest of the people rejoiced for us, as they were already out of the carcade and did not claim either my or the mechanical. Silence and grace settled in the camp in the morning and evening.

Once, weeks after two, Serega approaches and asks, "Listen, and when you walk into the house on a barrel, what color do you have?" Normal, I say ordinary. “And I have dark red, the color of carcade...” Go to the doctor, I say, let him write you something or analyze what he will do... “No, I will not go, what he will be my carcade to analyze!” And did not go.

I was approaching the end of the second month, preparing for the transfer. My carcade was almost over, the mechanic’s excessive consumption of barrel tea led to the fact that he had already touched the bottom of the barrel. A couple of days before the helicopter he solemnly turned the barrel in the evening, rubbed the last teaspoons out of it into a cup and pulled for the teaspoon. “Oh, look, here some leaflet fell,” the voice of our beloved doctor heard. He picked up a small piece of paper that fell from the bottom of the barrel and read out loudly: “Packier number five. Dried shinked beetle.” Seregina’s hand froze over the table with a raised teaspoon. What is it???“!”
How the kitchen tent stood, no one knows yet. The table stood only because his feet were buried in the ground. The people cried and crawled between the chairs, tearing each other’s paper out of their hands and almost every oral “Packier number 5, beetle dried...” For the remaining two days, the bears walked around the camp, because there were regular screams from it, “Packier number five!” and the island began to tremble.
Serega has since not drunk the carcade entirely, although the color of the stream has normalized quite quickly. I love the flowers of the Sudanese rose and drink it.

So, the accused, what can you pay for your excuse?

Xxx: If all seasons of the series are based on a book, it might be good. But if the first 3 seasons were by the source, then the writers take the job. So yes, it goes off.



I guess this series with one try.

Xxx: Don’t give up. My wife and I have been sitting at home for the second week. No one in the apartment was infected. Personally, I even tried to get fucked sexually. It doesn’t take and it’s all there.



Yyy: Maybe you have a special immunity, for accurate results you need others to try too, it’s for the sake of science.

Feminism is a struggle for women’s rights and men’s responsibilities.

I had a kidney colic attack. This is when the stone is tired of sitting in the kidney, and it with battles breaks through the urethra out. The pain of hell. Whoever survived, can then sin in vain, still hell boilers and hot pots of new sensations will not add.

No pills from this attack help. An emergency or a hot bath. In boiling water, the ureter expands, the stone moves to the next plateau and gives a short rest.

We rented the apartment and the bathroom was unusual. very small. It was possible to submerge only the fifth point, and the kidney area is not. Apparently, the former tenants destroyed the native bathroom and put it in exchange for something cheaper. And the managing company does not care, according to the receipt, the bath is white with red spots one and in nature also one, everything coincides.

Nothing to do, I call the neighbors, Pasha and Mash. Do you have a normal depth bath? Can I fall? Not a question. She is home alone, her husband at work. I picked up the boil, boiled, it became easier. I went home and called an ambulance. Pacha then returned and went with me for moral support.

We sit and wait for the car, and suddenly Pasha begins to laugh.
You are what? I ask.
“Yes, I’ve imagined how tomorrow I’ll tell the men at work: I’m coming home, my wife is in a cloth and the naked neighbor in the bathroom is wrapping. I didn’t even touch the neighbor with my finger. Absolute truth, but what will they think of me?
Don’t tell me you didn’t touch my finger. Say that the neighbor then sucked blood and went to the hospital. Absolute truth too.

Orwell wanted to write a warning and wrote a method.

Lifehack: Learn to be a carpenter or a carpenter, and in 5-10 years you will be a highly-paid specialist in a society where millions of "programmers", "testers" and "video bloggers" will hardly earn their bread.

Recalling yesterday’s story about the guard dog:
52-53 years ago, we had to make raids on a huge collegiate garden 2-3 km from the city where we lived. They stole a little – a couple of apples to each who ate while they were going home. The garden was without a fence - it was a plus for our "work", the guard had a gun with "salt" - it was a big minus, but the guard was crumbling on one leg (seems to be wounded in the war) - it was a plus, but soon he took a medium-sized dog and patrolled a huge garden with it - it is a big minus. The dog, hearing or seeing from a distance 3-5 "robbers", flooded with a thunderstorm and rushed behind us, leaving a choking colleague far behind, and we, instantly forgetting about the apples, grabbed out of the garden. The dog knew the territory of the garden and never escaped beyond its border. But once he struck us by surprise and ran when we started jumping from the trees. Well, all, the cape came, we fossilized. And the dog, running with a terrible loudness, noticing that the guard does not see us (strongly backward), rushed to kiss us, chewing his tail amusedly. He obviously wanted to have a lot of friends. We smote him until we saw a guard going far away and then rushed home. The dog laughed joyfully and led us to the end of the garden.
After that, we never stole an apple in the garden again, because there was a friend!

If Putin did not assign the generals titles to 27-year-old press secretaries Shoigu, NATO would have done so.

Departure from the hospital after the birth of the child. The last inspection, everyone seemed to find out and then suddenly remembered the question that tormented me:

- Tell me, but the water for bathing directly from under the crane to take or better filter?

The doctor stopped at the door and thought about the answer.

Is this your first child? He asked.

We have stumbled.

Well, of course you should filter. And already leaving quietly added, or then you will be born a second and you will not be engaged in any nonsense.

I was dating a guy for 6 years, a proposal made, the child tried to do. Friends are getting married on August 25, he is at work, I call to not delay, you need time to change clothes and go to the restaurant. His voice is strange, thoughtful. I ask him what happened, he says everything is okay, everything is fine. But I hear something wrong. I persuaded him to tell what happened. It turns out he was at the guess, on the coffee he guessed, said that I had enchanted him and could not be with me. I am in a stumbling state, and I ask, and why do I go to her at all? We talked about not believing this nonsense. And the story is not simple: it turns out he wanted to sleep with one lady, he did not get up, and the witch for some reason I. I never saw him again, I took things when I was at work. The fuck knows what’s in people’s minds. But for the better, I don’t want to know in a couple of years that he’s sleeping with who he wants.

Less than a year of relationship. I was with him, he was with me. I didn’t see women’s things. Nothing is suspicious. From the morning today he writes that he will be busy all day so that I don’t panic because of his silence.

What is busy?

The Wedding

Their own? )

And whose else?

I waited five minutes for it to be a joke. 10 minutes. 15 is Nippon is not a joke. It wasn’t a joke, he jerked me.