Conversation in a couple:
Well okay. Do you have imaginary friends?
It is. They are not my friends...

XXX: This is what people are.
xxx: I go home yesterday from the universe, a man approaches me with a map of Moscow, looks like a tourist, and in a broken Russian, he announces to me, "go nahuy" and ticks his finger into the map!
XXX: Teached the Blind
He showed you the way.

XXX: Give Me Away
YYY: HM
YYY: look at it!! What is it there?!!! to
The Food (
YYY: Yes no, it’s out there!!! to
xxx and there.
XXX: everywhere
Are you in the refrigerator?

"Hello to you! I am somehow. I can’t register."

It’s a pity that someone has such a beautiful Japanese name.

A grandfather and granddaughter of ten years have groomed and rattled.
Grandfather begins to get out of himself and screams to her: “Oh, you are a swamp plague!”and "
The granddaughter suffocating from indignation tries to pick up the answer and begins "and you...", and you can see how the brain works feverishly, and here it is! "And you are my grandfather!and the curtains. When they laughed, the conflict vanished.

Commentary on the film "Patriot":
The most pleasant thing about this film is that blacks here don’t read rap, don’t trade drugs, don’t rob anyone and even work.

The Gala:
Just got into the bank, just pigs.

The Rose:
pigs in the bank... so that’s a bowl

Scientists managed to record the conversation of plants on a video camera
From the comments:
The fact that vegetables can communicate with each other is proven by any social network.

The zombie is burning. The morning advice.
So, what to do if you have an empty refrigerator (at this point really show an absolutely empty hall)? Can I make a soup? We take potatoes, carrots, onions and greens. Then add the conserve.
You can also make a light omelette. Stir a bit of potatoes, add cut sausages. All this is poured with eggs and the cheese is roasted abundantly from the top.
Self-contained refrigerator

I sat quietly, peacefully. Then I was hungry. As in the fog.c) the alpha

Did you hear Andrew fall in love?
YYY is understandable.
yyy when you are chased by the military, took the rights to be drunk and have no place to live - a serious incentive is needed

He found a 100% effective way to neutralize his wife. You feed her one seed, and put a bag with the rest in the reach zone. All of. The woman is neutralized.

"here you do not do the post" (c) one of the employees of the Russian Post addressing the outrageous turn of people about the slow work.

Letter from the Children's Health Camp to Parents:
Hello dear Mom and Dad. I am well. I have friends who beat me every day. Please take me away from here."

I have a Samsung Galaxy smartphone, and every time I put it in my back pocket of jeans and forget about it, I sit on a chair... GOLAKTEKO DANGER!! 1

Workaholics are when morning stands catch you already at work!

I work in a shopping service abroad. Today we received a written message of the following content:

Good night!
I received a package from the United States today. No questions about the service - great job! thank you!
The question is: what is the emptiness in the package?
You have on the site said that "the emptiness in the packages is always covered with synthetic packaging material."
A small child took this "synthetic material" for corn sticks and, not thinking long, tasted a few pieces.
In a more detailed examination of these sticks, I also concluded that they are corn sticks - the color, smell and tactile sensations coincide (apparently, the rest - a comment from me).
Do you really use corn sticks when packing packages and can you not worry about the child?

You will not invent. I advised to consult a gastroenterologist - let the doctors laugh.

From Habr.
Discuss the new augmented reality glasses from Google.

Great, the microwave in the form of WiFi and Bluetooth was pushed to the eyes and brain to the maximum distance. Let’s see if there will be complaints of headaches at the first percentages.

YYY: You have a lead hat, fix it.

Yesterday I pulled the heater home from work, wanted to see where it was blowing all the time. Now I have a lot of pictures of a cat, his hottest is his face.

at the store "Taj Mahal" hangs the advertisement of the exhibition - "Mark Shagal", did not hold up - below attributed - "Ivan Bukhal"..)))