Swimming with the baby’s wife.
Why do we shower our kids every day? We do not wash ourselves every day.
It’s so bad that you don’t wash every day.

so, dear xxx and yyy, claiming that after absinthe in the morning there is no stank and smells of herbs...you are sure you drank absinthe??? I have such a feeling in my mouth after the absinthe that the green fairy put a bunch there and died of shame.

xxx> Tantes are so positive in their department. called, I come, they say - the system hangs at all, and I am not guilty, even porn sites have not been there. It usually starts every morning.
xxx> both at 40-45 years :D

Conversation with a professional driver.
You don’t know what it’s like to burn on a charged car. It’s drive, it’s adrenaline, it’s boiling blood! You will not be able to live without it!
- They went with me on a winter flight on a forestry. I guarantee you a full ass of such high-proof adrenaline, from which atheists urgently become believers, are baptized and in vain try to remember "Our Father".))))

The cat lay down on the noteboard, placed his legs and face to the grid of the radiator, and with a human voice said: "Humble, you see, I am cold!"

Response to Mosquito:

Attention to the question to the sincere people - do you all have a philological education in the Russian language? How do you teach Russians how to speak and write? Require respect for your language – learn to respect another language

The British write Defense, the Americans Defense, and no one accuses anyone of disrespecting each other. Why are you so uncomfortable that neighbors have a different literary norm? To me personally, how you say - but "because of Ukraine". We will talk as we like.

Fleming in that shell.

XXX is Hi!
I count on your knowledge of English.)
Translate a phrase of three words ;)
"Fuck me a bit" so it sounds like a conversation))
Yyy: Love Me Tender

Olka: Have you seen me at least once during home "spa-procedure"? Lady Gaga is nervously crushing her meat suit! :D

The United States intends to continue to fight terrorism across the globe.

> A little bit of liquidity:
Between 1959 and 1997, the United States carried out 5,780 terrorist attacks against Cuba. Of these, 804 terrorist attacks were massive, and 78 resulted in thousands of civilian casualties.

The terrorist attacks on Cuba killed 3,478 Cubans, and 2,999 people remained paralyzed for life. From 1959 to 2003, 61 illegal seizures of aircraft and ships were carried out. Between 1961 and 1996, 67 economic objects and the population on them were shot by naval ships.

The CIA headed 299 militant groups of 4,000 people. They are responsible for 549 murders and thousands of wounds. In 1971, biological aggression killed 500,000 pigs. In 1981, the introduction of the bleeding dengue fever caused the infection of 344,203 people, the deaths of 158 people, of which 101 were children. On July 6, 1982, 11,400 people were infected.

by Lenta.ru
At the end of January this year, Ukraine for the first time in several years was forced to become an importer of electricity. Kiev stopped energy exports to Belarus and Moldova and began to buy electricity from Russia.

The shortage of energy in Ukraine arose after the fall of the support of the power transmission line in the Zaporozhye region. The collapse of the support occurred due to the fact that the metallurgy collectors filed parts of the structure. As a result of the incident, the Zaporozhye nuclear plant was forced to stop one of the six power units and reduced production.

I offer the fools who cross the road in the wrong places to always have a note with them, so that the forensic expert can read: "The driver is not to blame, I am a fool who crosses the road in the wrong places."

The low passability of my car is compensated by a balloon in the luggage.

Summary of the applicant. I read.
Achievements: The head of the department was on parental leave.
A young man, a good achievement

"Tags of the day:
Yesterday, when I came home, I saw a sticky paper on the entrance door: "Residents, do not walk under the house - the pebbles are falling. Gothic"
In the morning, another one was added to this paper: "And the JEK did not try to clean the frogs, fool?"";
Today, there was another one below: "I tried. It was shrinking and shrinking."

S: Help who will tell which command to steal someone else’s IP
Format of C:
A: Thank you very much, it helped

You can imagine, I’m sitting at work yesterday, I don’t touch anyone.
He enters the office of a colleague who has recently left on vacation and puts a bottle of vodka in front of my nose! silently unfolds, leaves 0_o
Yesterday he came back and looked at us questioningly. Speaking of vodka? So I drank it! :)
He pulls another bottle out of the bag, puts it on the table and drops it.
HH: We are waiting for him today... we have accumulated questions)))12

Comments to a YouTube video where a couple of girls with terrible acting data under a sad soundtrack produce pseudo-emotional body movements on the rails:

222 is full of shit!! the topic of Anna Karenina is not disclosed
333: judging by the state of the arrow and canvas, the trains are not running for a long time... and in vain... the sapsan would not interfere with the final frames))))
444: Is this a shit? Do they wear these dresses? Are they singing? Are they standing on the rails? Do they shake their heads at 1:28? Are they changing clothes? Are they dressed? Didn’t they get the train down? NAHUYA????!!!by 1111
888 What are you? What a train? After all, these are children's romantic hearts, maximalism and other experiences... love and carrots and all that... don't ride here! T-34 ALL!
WWW: What kind of shit is this? About what at all? Please explain in 2 words. I thought they were in the middle of the roll suddenly the heat car maneuver would scratch :(
eee: where is the dirty train that will blur them on the dirty rails?? to

And a lot of comments of the same content...iiiiiii among all this:
RRR: so much grown up JD, I am very sad!!!! to

This is how the Americans invented radio signals, and the Russians smashed the radio.
But everybody knows only Popov.
YYY: Russian smattered the radio - so precisely Russian inventors have not yet been described.

My Alice doesn’t tolerate the lack of food in her bowl.
YYY: You can do nothing here.
XXX: Well... right up from the bed, asking for something to be poured. Then he squeezes a little and looks happy doing his business. Well, all right now... such a funny beast.
yyy: my furry very well understands the relationship between the concepts "start to noise" and "painful ass"
YYYY : )
The xxx :)

The fun ends when one of the boys, who got away for a beer, returns with the face shattered in blood.
The commentary:
Europeans have a very different mentality than ours. We would have looked like this - the fun started right away, when one of the boys, out for a beer (in the woods?!He returns with his face broken in blood.