Sponsor of this bad joke is the sorting center of the humorous publication.

The sorting center of the humorous public is jokes to the side.

Today they call from an unknown number and the girl offers money for bitcoin. I immediately say:
Do you want to earn 5 million rubles?
Yes of course.
- Then listen, transfer me to the bitcoin wallet from the company accounts 30 million rubles, and for this I give you a premium of 5 million rubles. The company lists this amount as a non-refundable loan.
But it doesn’t work that way.

From a bottle of milk

>> in the circle.

exactly is. If you are in Missouri, you are in Missouri.

Water boils at exactly 100 degrees

The temperature of boiling water depends on many factors. The selected temperature scale.

YYY: He is timid and knows how to develop
xxx: mmmm... developed by timlid... timlid gave a tasca, will give and fruit lubrication
Why the fruit?
We don’t write in asma to give the machine.

The daughter (2,5 years old) recounted the fairy tale "Terremok". Now we live in Termochka Mouse-Na-Uško, Frog-Kakuška and Rabbit-Pugajik : R

After receiving a message from the girl with the text "I brought you food", I first crossed, and only then realized that she took her younger brother to her parents and is going to me, forgetting about the puncture.

From ZJ mi3ch, 8 March:

“After 50 years of marriage, I once looked closely at my wife and said, ‘Fifty years ago we had a small house, an old car, we slept on the couch and watched a small black and white TV, but every night I slept in the same bed with a beautiful 19-year-old girl.
Now I have a huge, expensive house, a lot of expensive cars, a huge bed in a luxurious bedroom, a color TV with a wide screen, but I sleep in the same bed with a 69-year-old woman. I start to doubt my marriage.”

My wife is a very intelligent woman. She did not get offended or argue. She just offered me to find a 19-year-old girl, and she’ll make sure I live in a small house again, sleep on a sold-out couch and watch black and white TV.”

xxx: And in general, I am, by the way, an engineer of the first category, I have so written in the workplace!))

YYY : Wow! It’s like an egg of the first category, just an engineer.

xxxh: I just watched an Italian drama with an eight-March deviation. A man stands near the house and closes his jacket, a woman rises out of the window and cries, “And you can’t come to me again!” Let your wife prepare your lunch!"

How could you scream oxana?
March 7 to die
Friends come to drink.
You have taken the table.

>>> No need to go to bed at a time. Go to bed at 22:00.

To be home by the time.

This, and what about the long-short and satisfaction of the lady!!? It has nothing to do with it! If a lady just fingers can satisfy herself in a minute, and you chew on her for 10 minutes - do you still have illusions about the victoriousness of your member? The question here is generally about his questionable need in the process.

The woman is in the nursery, the husband is eating in the dining room... how tired are they of these hands-free inconveniences, which cannot even survive 4-7 days without the slave labor of the woman! It is shameful! As long as??And at the same time, the men know that they are the best chefs, ah... only they can’t cook for themselves, not even for one barrel, not for a family.

in a pornographic forum. Discussing the distribution of photos.

111. wallpapers are poorly folded))
by 222. Yes, they are normal, not new, but a difficult place))))
by 333. The wallpaper had to be sticky glued... a very strange approach to the sticking of irregularities, the edges had to be bended and cut at the sticking. Although I agree, a difficult place... requires experience.
and 444. In the wallpaper, the main thing is to choose them for a few days with a scandal between households. And then hang the carpets on the walls so that these wallpapers are invisible. The same thing.
by 555. In any case, a decorative layer had to be made at the corner to avoid turmoil. Otherwise, pornography does something. and :(

Why didn’t you collect and take out the garbage?
Yyy: Who am I to decide what is rubbish and what is not, what should disappear from our lives and what should remain. I am just a piece of sand in the vast sea of life. A small, very lazy piece of sand.

XXX: (calling the cat) Martha... Martha... Martha...
Why did you call the cat Martha? Martha is not a cat’s name.
Why is it not a cat, if we have a cat?

My ex once told me he was spending too much on me because he was paying for me on the bus.

Do you know how much this costs in a month?? to

I need both hands, there is no place to put the phone, I carry it with my palm. The ankle managed to remove the lock through the hood, go into the clock and reset the alarm at 2:17 at night.

Today was the apotheosis of man’s logic. The team consisted of 6 men and 12 women, so for the celebration of March 8, men bought 1 bottle of champagne for all women, 4 bottles of vodka for themselves and 4 liters of juice for all. I was very surprised when champagne was enough for a toast, after half an hour the juice ended, and the gentlemen suddenly became nothing more to drink vodka.