bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №45543
 06.04.2011
xxx: The news says that the Americans have directly addressed our Rosatom with a request to “not draw attention” to the fact that the Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant is essentially an American project and a product of American technology.
Yyy: And before that they asked not to draw attention to Libya.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №45542
 06.04.2011
Surmise: After 15 years of filling the house with things, my grandmother still admitted that the place was over.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №45541
 06.04.2011
Ten programmers sitting in the office
One smoked out the window and nine were left.

Nine programmers met with MacOS
One went crazy and there were eight.

Eight programmers googled about BDSM
One of them went in and there were seven left.

Seven programmers were looking for wool.
One hit the beard and there were six left.

Six programmers contested again.
One said that it was bad and there were five.

Five programmers are locked in the sorting
One struck his foot in a bowl and they became four.

Four programmers stayed there.
One decided to be a tarantula and there were three left.

Three programmers returned to their basement
One stumbled in the dark and two remained.

Two programmers scattered the викодин
One went away, they remained alone.

One programmer took a break.
So there are no more of them here.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №45540
 06.04.2011
A friend burns: looks at the monkey, finds information about some concert, comes into ecstasy, calls the guy:
and Valer! Cancel all plans for April 26th! I’m going to go to... A-A-A-A!!! This news has been around for 3 years =(

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №45539
 06.04.2011
Wikipedia article on sex toys:
XXX: What a cute whirlwind!
YYY: Sorry, but where do I need to vibrate it?
zzz: Yes, you can do a whole cartoon about it, "Toy Story" xD
XXX is Oga. And there will be "help the vibration escape to find its purpose".

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №45538
 06.04.2011
xxx: and why, sorry, monitors are even 17 inches larger for those who do not watch movies and edit photos 24 hours a day? Can you drive more with the mouse?
Why is the apartment more than 10 square meters? A man who doesn’t go around all the time. How long would it take to wash the bathroom, right? and :)

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №45537
 06.04.2011
From the hub, discuss the algorithm for searching for porn videos among the added materials:

XXX: Although, at the stage of acquaintance sounds very cool:
Girl: “What are you doing?” (expecting a boring answer)
xxx: Developer: “We filter boring porn from interesting!”

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №45536
 06.04.2011
Sori for Orphography.
Take care of illiteracy!

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №45535
 06.04.2011
Semen Aristarchovich: Ohhh, can I fight with you?
XHH: What is it? OO
Semen Aristarchovich: What is what?
What is the meaning of the word "commit"?))
Semen Aristarchovich: Will we reconcile?
XH: Yes
...
Q: Let’s go back to the topic of conversation. Or are we just talking about distracted topics?
Semen Aristarchovich: A?
XHH: Did you want to talk about something specific or just hurt?
Semen Aristarchovich: Specifically, I wanted to move
This is the PSC...

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №45534
 06.04.2011
Andrew V Semenov, 04.04.2011 22:07:40:
The sun would be a good teacher.

Menu, 22:08:51:
To be honest, I’m not sure...I don’t explain it clearly.

Andrew V Semenov, 22:10:05
You need to be honest ? ? ? ?

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №45533
 06.04.2011
from contact.
Picture with the inscription "Give her flowers. Without reason and without subjects. From the heart to the heart."
The comments:
Men are mad.
Flowers are not given.
The florists are mad. 600p for 5 Gerber and no discount for students.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №45532
 05.04.2011
Maska (daughter, 5 years old) approaches me with a serious face and says, "Do you want me to guess on your hand?"
I say, guess it well.
She took my palm with both hands, looked at it for a long time, scratched the “tick” and seriously said, “I’ll tell you the future.” You will soon be a grandmother.
I almost fell. She is 5 years old, so it’s too early to be afraid. But it started well, prepared as it should)))

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №45531
 05.04.2011
[MoF]Mad_Sorcerer
"Domodedov investigators stole witnesses and set fire to the building"

[MoF]Mad_Sorcerer
Sometimes it reminds me of GTA.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №45530
 05.04.2011
XXX: Have you slept?
Where do you sleep here?
You are just unorganized.
I went to work last night and slept :)

[ + 55 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №45529
 05.04.2011
I go to the bookstore with my father. Walked a little. He asks me, and remember, did you give me a book of a bald man, a Frenchman, who writes about ants? What is his name "
Yes, I remember, but what is his name?
I approach the consultant girl: “Girl, we can’t remember the author here... Well, such a bald Frenchman who writes about ants!”
She squeezed a little and said: "I understand who you are talking about! How they’re called – I don’t remember, but now I’ll show you where it stands!" and it brings us to the stand with Verber’s books. and we are all friends: "Aaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №45528
 05.04.2011
The corporate mail:
The man who dropped a box of vinegret from the refrigerator to the floor.
Then I put everything back into the box. To make your hands dry.

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №45527
 05.04.2011
A friend broke up with a guy, well, and I, as a faithful friend, went to comfort her.Meeted in the center, agreed to go to her, then go to bow in honor of the separation.We go to her home, meets her mother, looks at her daughter, asks:
M: Why is this acidic?
Q: Yes, Max and I split up, here we go and drink.
Then she goes to the kitchen and brings a bottle of champagne.
Why the shampoo?
Why do you celebrate?

The relationship between my husband and I was good xD

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №45526
 05.04.2011
Ukraine is the most tolerant country. There you can ask a question in Ukrainian, get an answer in Russian, and everyone will understand, nobody will be offended and even pay attention. It is the same that the philologist will seriously communicate with the lover of Albanian. And you are prepared to kill one another because of some pretext.

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №45525
 05.04.2011
20 years have passed and nothing has changed... my mother came, cooked to eat, put in a p*zduel and went to work...

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №45524
 05.04.2011
I drink a cup of tea for myself!!!! to
XXX is painful.
YYYYYYYYYYYYY...
The moral is not to drink hot tea.
But now I’m sweet :)
YYY: XD
Though I cheat, I drink tea without sugar.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna