bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №127056
 19.04.2016
Well yes. How to wash my clothes - so oh, and suddenly I break, and there is a bunch of regimes, to sort by fabrics and flowers, and my friend died from such, maaaamaya!
What will happen to you if you wash everything, hang it, dry it, and start smoothing - wow, you know how many regimes you have?
And as for the baby - yes, she is there at home in a decree / retirement does, then all the little things and attention is not worth it.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №127055
 19.04.2016
If everything is so sad, then what prevents courteously weighing such "guests"? But, apparently, you are not so sad as long as you tolerate. And why then dwarf?
××××××××
Everything is right. In addition, from really close relatives, also obsessed with a sense of tact, just so, that is, peacefully, you will not get rid of. When our second child was born, we lived in very difficult circumstances. So when the mother-in-law began to rush to come to help (for a couple of thousand kilometers and for a long time) we refused, explaining in detail that there is no place and there is no place for her to sleep. A couple of days later, the mother-in-law was standing in front of the door with a deck under the mouse. She decided that she would sleep in the kitchen, so the problem was solved.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №127054
 19.04.2016
A drunk colleague complains to a friend: "I went to a health food store, I wanted to buy a cocktail for weight loss, and there are some gluconates and sorbents - solid chemistry, I didn't take this poison!"
Apparently, the phrase "gluconates and sorbents" for her means something like "glutamate and preservatives". Harmless calcium and activated charcoal are in vain.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №127053
 19.04.2016
How can a child be called Milena???? to
This is a black stool when bleeding!

Black stool with bleeding in the gastrointestinal tract - melena.

[ + 19 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №127052
 19.04.2016
20127, Paranoia needs to be treated. Hunting children is a schizophrenia.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №127051
 19.04.2016
In "French Economics" the question of rare names was studied. Rare names are given by people uneducated, but with claims (in the United States this trend comes from Negro ghettos).

The level of education has just fallen, and the pounds have grown, and that is all.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №127050
 19.04.2016
kuzneczberg: I honestly admit, my attitude to selfie is ambiguous. First, selfie in Pshek - samojebka, which in itself symbolizes selfie.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №127049
 19.04.2016
Discussions on planners
The man who at this time will know the power of the earth is very jealous.
yyy: Maybe you'll open up a second element, so it's not so bad :D
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXX: Call of the fucking demon to land.
Fuck you, I’m chasing you!
Luke, I am your father!
yyy: I slowly cleanse the carrots from sin x)
XXX: 50 Shades of Tomatoes

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №127048
 19.04.2016
Change the cranes. To install my, balls, sanitary refused, exhumed somewhere a couple of good, proven Soviet samples... On the third day they fled in the middle of the white day, when they were all at work, flooding neighbors. When trying to arrange a scandal in the JEK, the chairman killed me with the phrase: "Beautiful cranes, you just probably crushed them." Escaped from this nonsense in order not to get infected, called the sanitary on the announcement, I am pleased with the result.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №127047
 19.04.2016
Now order was put in the laboratory.
The neighbor took out an old microwave under the table.
Well, everybody ran away - who needed what... it turned out) Who had the ventilator, who had the engine.
Who with the answer, who with the boxer.
A friend came:
You, like blacks, landed on a dead begemot... and each with his machete.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №127046
 19.04.2016
There was a philosopher, Thomas More, who was caught by a thief.
A week later the thief was rescued from Thomas More)))

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №127045
 19.04.2016
So, parents, dress children stricter and more wise - in long sweaters, long pants, closed dresses, shirts. for their good and safety. Young age should not be an excuse for impeccable clothing.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Fuck it now. Give all the babs in the hijab – you will be Iran.Shared, fucking, pedophile hysteria.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №127044
 19.04.2016
The daughter finds a long belt, runs with him around the apartment, runs to us with her wife and says: I am a shepherd!!! Seeing our amazed faces decides to clarify: Well... the cow representative!

[ + 28 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №127043
 19.04.2016
Who wrote about "Baptism"? My wife and I trusted our grandmother for the summer. The child was returned with pneumonia. Why is? "Well, he is not baptized with you, I took him to church". Now she is very upset that she is not allowed to see her grandson.

My son is not three years old.

[ + 24 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №127042
 19.04.2016
In various regions of our wonderful country there are some of their own, local names familiar to all things. Thus, a bowl of bread in the Volga is sometimes called a saika, and the long-distance drivers of remote regions of the landlords call the impenetrable bows.
But only Peter’s parades fought.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №127041
 19.04.2016
- I want to give a fun home piece of pyjamas with ears (so that when my husband is not at home, walk it)))))
- I gave this pyjama to my husband on the NH, and then I went to suffer that I want the same))
I represented a healthy unshaken man in a pyjamas with ears. I wept. I went googling pyjamas available for an adult uncle.
“After I saw a dark, deeply pregnant rabbit coming out of the dark room in the hospital, hugged with a dropper on the wheels, I can’t imagine that...Pyjamas with ears is power!
Aaaah aaaah!! to
- I really wanted to roast loudly, but it was somehow uncomfortable in front of the dark rabbit )) But for how many years this picture is not smoothed out of memory ))))

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №127040
 19.04.2016
How to Survive Love Loss
kefir and a couple of ripe slives
Two cucumbers and Coca-Cola
And now you have to joke.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №127039
 19.04.2016
What night the advanced parent went.It turns out, it all depends on the name.Individuality directly will grow around the grandchildren, the main name needed to pick up.Such settings are default.Called the child Algenbradom-Opa,Nobel laureate.Well, otherwise,not a slider.
And education, occupation, education is nonsense for unadvanced))

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №127038
 19.04.2016
I sent a text, a quote. She signed the page, the publisher, the note number, everything as it should be. In response, give me a link!
There is no reference, I say. This is an excerpt from a printed book.
In response, silence is apparent. A printed book, how is it?

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №127037
 19.04.2016
XXX: I just understood something important
If I pull out two peelmen from each of the neighbors’ packages, I will have a full-fledged dinner and they will not notice anything.

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