bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №98564
 29.05.2014
We talked with the casting director near the buffet.
She: Let’s go back to Moscow, let’s film the hospitals.
I: It is great! I’m going to meet some beautiful young pathologist.
Alina, knowing me well, sneezes and leaves. The buffetchica, not knowing me at all, asks:
Why a pathologist?
First of all, a doctor is a respected profession. Meat in the house.
(From the snow)

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №98563
 29.05.2014
AAAA, grandfather on the green six exists!!! Today he cut me to the left to the right, while talking on a cell phone. At the next intersection, I passed quietly and relentlessly on the long-burning red. Save who can!! to
ZY: Switch, Router, Server and Kotte

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №98562
 29.05.2014
The news:
Google shifted the letters in the logo by two pixels
I’ve been waiting for this news this year!!! to

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №98561
 29.05.2014
rights, duties, boars, children... anything, but in all my short life no one has said “I get married because I love.”

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98560
 29.05.2014
A store of handicrafts. Handcrafted ladies, relaxing like in a warm bath, somnambulously smiling, wander between the stands and buy for angry amounts whole bushes of a variety of goods, even without coming to consciousness.
A young mother was stupidly drawn into this purely female nirvana with her boy boy of five. Mom tried to relax, but the furious child wanted to run and constantly jumped away from her far beyond the other shelves. Finally, she was a little overwhelmed by the constant pursuit of her child, began to read it out loud and demand that the son be around all the time and not run away from her. The son seemed to listen attentively, but, judging by his eyes, in his head a certain thought struggled. When Mommy got tired of mocking him and shut his mouth for a second, he surprisedly asked, "What are you bored without me here?"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №98559
 29.05.2014
A friend complained, a pre-beast, climbed to the diploma again, said "why do you have two gaps on page 52? Why is the line short?" He doesn’t know what to do anymore, the whole group is fighting.
YYY: Strangely, I wrote the fuck twice somewhere in 67 pages of my diploma for interest. Protected by 4.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №98558
 29.05.2014
My husband and I look differently. I now have a superagent with a chip in my brain that neutralizes the toxin with a fire extinguisher. And with him the fairy Din-din helps to find the real love of the evil queen.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №98557
 29.05.2014
Many people get little in life because others take everything from life.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №98556
 29.05.2014
His name is Cosmonaut. The parents are original. In general, one day he travels from the city of Taldy-Kurgan to Alma-Ata. The distribution is decent, and there are almost no settlements. Well, and swallowed a little. Everywhere you go, there is a hoax. Speed of 140 km/h. “Are you a pilot?” Gaia is upset. “No, I’m a cosmonaut,” the guy replied. “You’re still mocking,” said the haishnik and demanded documents. After a moment, he stood by laughter. “Truly, Cosmonaut,” said the haishnik, wiping tears and returning the documents.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №98555
 29.05.2014
Putin's rating: in January - 60.6%, the current - 87.4%.
Price of pork: in January - 116 rubles / kg, today - 195 rubles / kg.
For now, Putin is the winner in the rate of pork growth: 44% vs 68%.

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98554
 29.05.2014
Our regular "electronic" Leha is a quiet, modest guy. For this reason, little was known about his life outside the collective until now. And about one case, "discovered" for drunkenness at the corporation, Lecha doesn't like to remember at all. In short, in order.
Once he comes for lunch, he climbs the stairs, he sees - a man knocked at his door with the castle is fighting. Clear pen is a thief, and the wife is apparently still walking with the child. He pretends to be higher, passes by, turns to the next staircase, climbs three stairs, turns sharply, and in a Shaolin jump in flight beats a man from his leg to his cheek. He beats his forehead at the door, falls backwards, runs his glands, seeds and a pack of papyrus fly out of his pockets, a frightened wife flies out of the apartment.
In general, it turned out - she broke the castle, and the man was a slug from the JEK.
And Lehi has been pursuing Heath since then.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98553
 29.05.2014
Well, the fact that Ellie was actually called Dorothy, many people know.
Goodwin’s original name was Oscar Zoroaster Phadrig Isaac Norman Henkle Emmannuel Ambroise Diggs.
det: I understand Volkov, the name "Ostap Sidor Fedor Izza Nikolai Emmanuel Abram Kopatel" would look somehow not so...

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98552
 29.05.2014
From the topic "Tell me what is the movie?":
What kind of movie, where the man knocked the doors of abandoned houses, in which the youth struck, and then burned them?
The story of yesterday’s news.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №98551
 29.05.2014
aleks_grey / Gwynn, 28.05.2014 11:03:50:
In Russia, there will be non-refundable train tickets
===
This is when you are sold a ticket there and not sold back.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №98550
 29.05.2014
***Marina has added abbasraka, knopo4ka74 to this chat ***
Marina: Guys, we have a supplement: Olya (analytic) and Sasha (server programmer). Add to!
Boris: abasraka and knopo4ka74, big!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98549
 29.05.2014
Our logist today by phone:
Thank you, you are an eyewitness.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №98548
 29.05.2014
Reference to one of the universities:

"The Institute is so foolish that after it they are not even taken into the army".

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98547
 29.05.2014
Rainy days, general chat of animal shops sellers:

We are also deaf.
YYY: And we have silence ;(
ZZZ: And we are here :)
We were looking for a hammer!
bbb: 0_o
ccc: a murderer
XXX: We also came to the shale asking
XXX on Sunday
ddd: we once asked a rainbow for a rabbit))))
XXX: OO
ddd and shoes

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №98546
 29.05.2014
The logic:

On average, it takes about three years for a man to make such a decision. If she lived for two years and fled, she was impatient. I just didn’t wait. Then just work the habit and old popular wisdom - "the good good is not sought." Be patient and wait for each other. Everyone is concerned.
**************
I met with her before the wedding for 0.5 years, we have been together in marriage for 14+ years. There are different people who build life on the calculation of all the little things, and who intuitively captures the overall picture and model all sorts of options. For one, your advice for happiness will be, and another life will ruin. A personal approach is needed.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98545
 28.05.2014
xxx> today is the day of the sashnikov

yyy> and the border guard

xxx> apparently, it is because they guard our border, borders of the homeland, guard, border service, service shepherds, buy cheap military uniform

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna