bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №113079
 07.05.2015
I work in the pharmacy as a captain. The man comes in, all in the clutches, the face of the hardened criminal and says: "We have a new neighbor bully hit. Give me a sedative, or I’ll kill him. I am reluctant to sit again.”
I have never felt such a responsibility in my life.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113078
 07.05.2015
The Ukrainian enters the bar.
Give me a beer!
of 20 hryvnia.
There were 10!
10 hryvnia - beer and 10 hryvnia - tax on the ATO.
Okay well.
He gives 20 hryvnia and receives 10 hryvnia.
There is no beer!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №113077
 07.05.2015
to sex. I think sex is more important for girls than for boys. They have both the clitoris and the g-spot and several types of orgasm - not the same as a three-second male.
Another thing is that all this good needs to be used, but this is a completely different story.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №113076
 07.05.2015
Someone wrote a bad review about a Chinese company and the Chinese spammed the mail as if the entire Chinese economy depended on it.

Then the Chinese decided to move into the offensive:
Vladimir Volodya Semenovich
Semenov Mikhail Yurievich is a bad user.we with the company "Dycod" have worked for more than 10 years, they are a very good company, "Dycod"Ltd is a very good supplier I think Semenov Mikhail Yurievich is his competitor bad person,all customers definitely do not believe!!! to
by Alexei Alekseevich
We also believe that this is the best supplier in China, our director said that we will always work with them, and the business will grow, it is a good company, and its director Tom Volodya is a good and honest person, thank you “DYCOD”!! to
DYCOD Ltd
Our company never deceives the customer, we are an honest company, and Semenov Mikhail Yuryevich is a user ugly person. he always asked for a photo for XILINX, and I know he often does fake, the poet we do not provide them with a photo, then he repay us and gave us a bad feedback, this is a ugly person, I am an honest person, delete this account please, thank you great!!! to
Semenov Mikhail Yuryevich
I am wrong, this is a good supplier in China, we really want to work with you, sorry, I think all the customers are working out, they have good trust!! to

Very pleased with the last comment on behalf of the same user. The Chinese Mafia has arrived.

[ + 30 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113075
 07.05.2015
A boy and a girl find themselves on a deserted island by some miracle survive and now they have become adults and like it is time to start breeding? Here’s what thoughts must be in your head to think about before you stop the letter in spite of the blood and pain? This is sadism in its pure form. No one told them that it should be the first time.? to
— — — —
An amazing case. And how did cats, mice and dogs not disappear without educational pornography?
To squeeze the letter in the letter, despite the blood and pain - an unpleasant and unnecessary thing, and without a long pull that "everyone does it, it is necessary" does not come to the mind. And it will come to the mind of normal young people so uncorrupted by civilization - to embrace. That at the appropriate age and with a normal hormonal background will cause excitement and the desire to rub the corresponding parts of the body.
Blood and pain, by the way, are greatly exaggerated, and are associated not with the fact itself, but with the inability and desire of the fool-boy to appear a strong man at the moment when you need to be gentle and attentive. What is more often the consequence of poor upbringing in a society, where male tenderness is mocked, and courtyard stories are taken as a model about the "down, planted." Well, and the counter-education of girls about "tolerate, men need it".

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №113074
 07.05.2015
How has Inet changed. Where are all those people who, in response to requests from users "where to get", gave links to torrents and exchangers? Those who did not oral "buy a face", but threw a reference to the worker crack. Those who weren’t fooled by Google and their own brains, those who thought that melting a copy was just melting a copy, not starving on Uncle Bill and the bark with him. Those who, when the problem arises, grabbed hex or google, depending on knowledge and abilities.
I am a pirate. It was I who supported rubles of potters, buying pirate discs when there was no normal injection. It’s I rolled and rolled with torrents games, movies, software and music. It is I cutting down the downloaded content to friends and acquaintances on pins and throwing it on the flashes so that they can also use it. Absolutely free of charge. It’s I get fabulous girls by putting "my"s forks for beer. I will tell you where to download, not where to buy. I bought only one game in my whole life, when I was young and stupid. This is what I will say, how to "fix" a purchased or downloaded pirate curve. I do not use a multiplayer and do not shake technical support, all my problems I solve myself. My conscience is calm. Jo-ho-ho and a bottle of rom.
Spit with saliva and hate here.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №113073
 07.05.2015
Juliya: watched cartoon "In Search of Nemo"?)
Maxim: Yes
Juliya: Do you remember the fish, Tori?
Maxim: her
That’s why you remind me of her.)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №113072
 07.05.2015
Dacha is a monster of some sort. You will go out in the morning to write, just not waking up, and already crawl beds without washing and not having breakfast.)))

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №113071
 07.05.2015
YYY: What do you want?
XXX: Mercedes... S250... white
YYY: No, give me what I can.
XXX: 2008... they are cheaper

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №113070
 07.05.2015
The case was in 1991.I served a term.I lie in the hospital.The time is an hour of the night.Wake up a nursing nurse."A fighter take someone needs one merchandise from the bed to the morgot"I immediately realize that this is not my duty,but from this you can pick up not a bad hatchback.In the army at the time there were 4. Eat, sleep, drink and have sex. I instantly calculate the probability and get at the output almost 100 percent chance of getting alcohol. What do I get the answer – what do you need? I answer - 200 grams of alcohol.I see that the face hasn't broken "I add to everyone"Getting something like a baby and you won't crack?Does the harry not crack?I said no. The consent was given. I will be a guy. by character Mercury! Will you drink? Who is he to kill? I’ve killed, let’s hide the body. He is where? I fucking will find! In the sea, he is brilliant.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №113069
 07.05.2015
Somewhere five years ago, with a periodicity of once every six months-a year, I was called by an unknown male voice in a clear submission-hello, who are you, you are not my ex, etc?
I asked to remove my phone number, when I first guessed, I just dropped it.
And yesterday I sit with a friend, I drink martini, a call, because I was waiting for my son, and he could not call from his, then I answer and hear the same crying voice.
After reading, you ask who?
I'm a whitewoman, if you don't stop calling, the next time I'll read about Ruslan and Ludmila and I'll call, we sit with a friend we laugh, a minute after 15 calls, I turn on a loud call and I hear - Ir, I recognized you, you already work in the library?
The children fled from another room to our wild hook.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113068
 07.05.2015
From the discussion of the fresh law-explanation of the information, undesirable children.

<<<1. encouraging children to commit acts that pose a threat to their life and (or) health.>>>>

Call to serve in the army. It poses a threat to their life and health. c) Amarao

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113067
 07.05.2015
I read the gender joke here, and I realized that my husband and I were the perfect couple, hell! I am fat, he is poor. Maybe that’s the secret that we’ve been together for eight years. % of

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №113066
 07.05.2015
XHH: Apparently, this chicken during her lifetime suffered from typhus, scabies and Spartacus.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №113065
 07.05.2015
Oh my God! What is that on your neck?! to
This is Sasha. The son of us. 24 is soon.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №113064
 07.05.2015
They met on the dating site, not while waiting at the bus stop. It is natural for a man to be interested in sex. And a woman, if not a fool, also understands that.
____________________________________

If a man is only interested in sex, then this should be before a real meeting. Only you don’t do that, because in most cases you’ll be silently placed on a blacklist. If you offer sex on a first date, who are you looking for? And it’s not even about morality, but about the elementary instinct of self-preservation. You come to a strange man home, and there are seven others waiting for you and let go around. Or you will get a sleeping pill, and in the morning you will wake up locked in a basement, where you will be held against your will and raped. In addition, they can kill you. It is also not worth bringing to yourself, you will get a blow to the head and wake up in an empty apartment if you wake up. And I do not have a sick fantasy, I have an uncle as an investigator working and such cases are crazy and nearby. And how many diseases can not be protected by a condom. They are transmitted by air droplets. I’m positive about sex and when I don’t have a permanent partner, I have friends for sex. But sex with a stranger is to be a brainless chicken in order to agree to it.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №113063
 06.05.2015
We watch football, grandmother in the village, match "Zenit"- "Spartak". Babula (B) - a person away from football, asks questions and comments during the game.

B: I think who plays "Zenit" and "Spartak"?
I: Well yes...
B: Well, these are the Russians, and why are the Negroes running there?
I: They are playing, grandmother, for money.
B: Aaaah, so the white ones don’t want to play themselves and let them go instead?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №113062
 06.05.2015
Anatas: There is a separate boiler in hell for those who talk about separate boilers in hell.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №113061
 06.05.2015
They help society (especially men) to be less aggressive in everyday life, because lack is the root of many evils. If there were no prostitutes, rape would be almost the norm, and so paid-satisfied, and everyone is well. If you are not aware of the benefits to society of this or that group, then read on the subject, look at the statistics there, well, I don't know. These are good bees, do not stumble on them, better feel about what goats they sometimes have to deal with. If they had not, it would be possible that you or your relatives would have. Personally, I am concerned in this business only its illegal status: the phenomenon is nowhere to go, so it would be better to legalize and provide girls with social and legal protection. They would pay taxes too, okay, don’t they?
____________________________
You are just like a little boy. It is not possible, because they undermine the foundations, shake the scraps and... In short, paid women are grossly dumped compared to free women - so that a slight such lobby movement is automatically formed against them.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №113060
 06.05.2015
From the online game forum:
xxx: All the weekend played this shit with nick "Govassik". I realized that I had achieved success when someone near me appeared with nick "GovashikPidor".

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna