bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №127593
 01.05.2016
Write as you are in the office.
Theme: OK
...
I am an office.
I'm not going to fix it :R
WOW: How much meaning can be hidden in two errors >_<

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №127592
 01.05.2016
XXX: Do you want to go south or hunk?
zzz: the wreck may at least swallow its wings, but it will not reach the south. It will fall halfway from exhaustion, and no swallows will help it, because they will be mocked. Their words do not mean anything before the journey, they will renounce them as easily as they give promises. Somehow it all works.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №127591
 01.05.2016
We have an electrician at the factory with the name King. And when you call the controller to turn off the transformator, they ask who gave the good. You answer: "The King has allowed".

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №127590
 01.05.2016
Ten years ago in our city began to demolish sludge-filled houses. Residents were given new apartments from the state, and the meterage was counted for each tenant. Entrepreneurial citizens, wishing to improve the conditions, began to buy apartments in these houses, the price in a couple of months went up to heaven. A square meter in the houses, which Lenin remembered alive, was equal to the metro in the new residential complex of last year’s building... And because for the hook, an entrepreneurial man agrees to pay any money!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №127589
 01.05.2016
When my grandmother was dying, I saw that Stalin on our magazine table, in tapes and bands, danced the cancan and called her to hell.
Shut it down if it wasn’t Glucks!

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №127588
 01.05.2016
No other acquaintance, who proudly praised himself as a vegan, who claimed to value any life, even the smallest mosquito, has not passed the test of mosquitoes.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №127587
 01.05.2016
Orthodox proletarians of all countries, unite!
Christ has risen! Go to the mausoleum!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №127586
 01.05.2016
But Lexus is not made with the MCP. Arriving in the machine.

I understand it, brother! The same trouble - shochu with the ACP is not released 8-)))))

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №127585
 01.05.2016
In the coffin.
"And you will fly up your pockets"

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №127584
 01.05.2016
They usually get those to whom they were unable to reach.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №127583
 01.05.2016
I played with my son on a horse. He slapped him on the neck until he struck a little bit of the tumble. This great rider tears from me, asking:
Is the horse hurt?
very strongly.
Couldn’t you catch me anymore?
I cannot.
It is sorry. Will have to shoot.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №127582
 01.05.2016
For detailed information about the nature of Siberia use the link.

[ + 27 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №127581
 01.05.2016
News "Jews sold a synagogue in Marseille to Muslims"
HHH: They just want to get...

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №127580
 01.05.2016
30 April 2016. The Easter Eve. In front of me in a row, a man buys cupcakes, eggs, cakes of all kinds... In short, he is preparing for the holiday. When the cashier proclaimed the sum, even I shrugged... 666 rubles.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №127579
 01.05.2016
I send two younger sons to sleep (the older one is almost shaking up). Within a few minutes, they are already carried around the house, playing a horse, crawling and laughing. I’m upset: “Children, are you sleeping like that? :shock: - "Oh, mom, go to bed, it's just like you take a picture!"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №127578
 01.05.2016
Adding the intrigue:

Today in one of the districts of the city will change the quality of drinking water".
It is intriguing, fucking. I would also add: "Have you guessed what"

The main question is where the water quality will change ;)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №127577
 01.05.2016
We have a couple of young people working at the department as operators of the 20s. A bit unusual. Usually this is an uncertain age aunt, stuck to the loss of the instinct of self-preservation. The chief explained that the youths are undergoing alternative military service, in the sense that they have already passed, and so have remained (with work in the city is not thick). In this regard, the question was raised:
“Well, okay, now they understand... And what punishment are we taking here?
"Friendly rust" was the answer.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna