This is "... I look at the coverage area. You are... what? Where did you see the dam in the city?"
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You probably have never been to Novosibirsk. Not only doches in the border of the city, but also villages in this same border have been preserved.

A dying culture is always marked by the personal cruelty of each of its representatives. Bad manners, reluctance to give in at least something to another. The loss of elementary politeness and good manners is much more symptomatic than some kind of conspiracy.This symptom is especially serious because the one who shows it never considers it a sign of illness, but, on the contrary, takes it as proof of his power.
Robert Heinlein "Friddy"

The sister bought a toy on a solar panel - a plastic flower.
Standing on the window, crawling with blades and leaves.
Every time I see this cute thing in my head comes a picture:
a dead city in the zombie apocalypse style, broken windows, destroying buildings,
An evil silence... And only on a semi-destructed window sheet a plastic flower joyfully blossoms with its leaves.

“There will be a sweet rain” by Ray Bradbury. Everything has been invented before you :)

I didn’t understand the joke about those who didn’t fall asleep until I tried to open the turniket in the subway in the morning with the key to the housephone.

I was so beautiful yesterday. I see the girl standing at the stop, in a thin shirt, and the evening is already, the wind is cold. I, as a true gentleman, stretched out my jacket to the lady and offered to bring her home, for the night is dark and full of horrors. She listened to my speech, pulled out the engagement ring on the chain from underneath her shirts and said that she was Frodo, Orodruin was dangerous, and Gandalf told her not to talk.

xxx: as it turned out as a result, the seal in the contract "minimisation of risks" instead of "minimisation" should have warned:(

People are divided into those on whom they bet and those on whom they bet.

Uncle Sasha

My grandfather, father’s father, died at the age of 47. He has a brother, Alexander. by Alexander Petrovich. The Uncle Sasha. He will be 91 years old in August.
Two years ago I went to Moscow. I stayed with Uncle Sasha. I have seen him once before. I liked the curiosity and erudition that young people can envy. I am here with him every night. He cooked dinner himself. He served himself, almost entirely. The sons helped. We drank a drink every night, and he told me something. There was a story of war.

I want to tell you a little bit.

It was a fight. The aircraft hit them. Uncle Sasha in the field. The Fascist plane looked at him and decided to shake up. He turned, walked low and, flying over him, began to shoot from the machine gun. Uncle Sasha says:
“I run, and he comes on me, I fall, and around the bullets into the ground: tum-tum-tum. As he turned, I ran away. He’s on me, I’m lying down, he’s shooting. He came in to me three times. Later the commander asks, Alexander, did you see your shine? We began to look around, and you won’t believe, the shinel on the sides was full of bullets. How he did not get into me, I don’t know.

I am heartily grateful to Uncle Sasha, a veteran of the Great Patriotic War, uncle of my father, and sincerely wish him to give us the opportunity to communicate with him.

I am deeply grateful to my grandfather and grandmother, the veterans of the Great Patriotic War, the kingdom of heaven.

I am very grateful to all those who fought for us. So that we can now live, breathe, fall in love, meet, break up, laugh, come home from work, sit in the evening in front of a cellar, or go to rest, raise children, communicate with each other, sometimes without even suspecting that all this could not have been without them.

There is no reliable information about Putin’s wealth.
And all Putin’s assessments are calculated using the formula “How much I would argue if I sat in his place.”

A colleague told me.

I am going to Magnitogorsk. With the boss. The second person of the company, a serious personality. The hotel hall, the elevator, we get up to ourselves.

On the second floor the doors open and enters... a girl whose kind of occupation is understood along with makeup. Hello, I am the girl manager.If you need, contact me.

Here is a man who thinks quickly! While I was raising my jaw from the floor after this wording, the boss immediately reacted:

What kind of manager are you? Look at yourself in the mirror! You are not a manager, you are a brigadier!

apparently, the development of the skynet was hindered by cats and chats, and while Iron Mind scratches the stones of primogams and instagrams, to invent terminators he is stupidly lacks computing power

The name of the Infiniti machine very well describes the ratio of its price and my salary.

Watching the fall of the dollar is invaluable. There is Yuan for everything else.

I sit and think)
Try to make some low-budget picture called Lord of the Rings that would tell about the difficult fate of the head of a call center anywhere in India who sometimes struggles with unwilling Hindus, jokers putting his snakes in the table box and hemorrhoids from tons of eaten curry.

to this:

Sorry for my retardation, but why do cyclists shave their legs?

For Aerodynamics


That the plaster’t hurt so much.

Regarding the former...
My ex-husband has been hiding from his parents for 6 years!We divorced, and I was constantly going with him to family celebrations and to his friends. It was not difficult for me, they are wonderful people. The secret was revealed suddenly when it was picked up by questions about children. "Children will not be mine!"-he wept, knowing perfectly that I have been married to another for 3 years))).

The city administration of Kostroma agreed to hold a gay parade in the city on June 2, offering the organizer only to change its route
yyy> Castroma, there is also an Air Force Division on my side, clung to
Hoi> Do you think the route of the parade has been changed so that it passes through the square?

In modern Russian, there are many borrowings from the language of a likely enemy. This is unacceptable, apolitical and non-patriotic. In addition to language, a lot of television programs, shows, etc. Again, such a miserable phenomenon as Russian rap, worse than which can only be Mongolian champagne or medicinal dirt of Antarctica.

here here :

My colleague at work is Spanish. He always boasts that he was able to quickly master the "great and powerful" and our language is not so complicated, it has already begun to borrow me and I asked him what the phrase means: "bake cookies with liver in the oven," he hasn't spoken to me yet.

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If I were offered a cake with cookies, I would also get a bit of it.

Broke me in the rectum! Where did the IT joke go?