bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 40 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64352
 17.05.2012
Order and career are two communicating vessels, if the career went up, then...

[ + 39 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64351
 17.05.2012
I had a real case - I came with my wife to visit my aunt, my wife was driving, and the courtyard at the aunt was even lighter than on the video. Look, the lady is about the same way “parking”. I’m telling my wife – don’t get close to her, you see, it’s going to break up now. We stopped at 15 and looked. She started slowly and then hit a car. She was nervous, started to break out and the beetle grabbed. Here she already has an amok, she confuses the pedals, and in the back with all the doors enters the car from behind. He stops at the accident, opens the door and goes to our car. I think — well, maybe I need to help, I straighten out the belt to get out, and the lady approaches my wife and begins to cry out the window:
You are all to blame!! You are! You looked at me!

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №64350
 17.05.2012
A person who looks in both directions when crossing a street with unilateral movement is not a pessimist. This is a Russian who lives in the city.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №64349
 17.05.2012
XX: And as far as Largus is concerned, there’s a lot of potatoes in there.

YYY: Find 10 differences in the style of the larus from the potatoes and get the heating of the rear glass as a gift, so that the hands do not freeze when you push it to the CTO.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №64348
 17.05.2012
A man who taught children to hunt and drive a car is, of course, a great gift. But why are only mothers accusing men of being cowards and cowards? Why did this man and question not arise, and what do the fathers of these children teach? After all, in principle, mothers should probably teach beautiful (including playing a violin tube), and fathers - the harsh truth of life (fighting and driving a car). And then there is not a very funny answer. And many fathers have children and not, their fathers abandoned them. And it’s not always women’s fault. Have you tried raising your child alone? Do you know what it is? And you will always be able to choose the right principle, according to which you need to raise a child, so that he grows up as a human being, and not sloppy, considering that no one will support you?
I would, of course, explain to these mothers, for the fact that they deceived you, that in our world you need not only to be able to dude on the tube, but also to stand up for yourself with a couple of examples. But nevertheless, it is not necessary to blame only one parent, women do not make children for themselves.

With respect, single mother.

P.S I do not feel any hatred for men, despite the above, and I would have given many women a good crack.

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64347
 17.05.2012
I read an interview with the mayor of Donetsk about the problems with the homeless during the Euro 2012.
Their outflow is observed from the end of May to September, because they leave on the coast of the Azov Sea, where they are recreational zones. This is an annual natural process"

Can the book be written - "All about the natural migration of bombs to the south"?

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №64346
 17.05.2012
I came to do fluorography, including the pop (Orthodox) sitting in the line, and just behind me.

They bring us, a man 5 (including the pop), into the predecessor to divide. I am standing, I am dressed. The apparatus is approached by the pop and the voice by which the services are conducted is issued: "I bless this hell's car!Then I crossed her.The eyes of the nurse had to be seen.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №64345
 17.05.2012
You have added Camilla.

Kamila: Hi to you. Can I meet you?
Support service: Hi
Support Service: Unfortunately, this is not possible at the moment.
Q: When is it possible?
Support: This is the ICQ of the company Web-canape and on this chat I will only answer the questions of our customers.
Tagged: fool

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №64344
 17.05.2012
Features of the new Kia Rio:
Smells of laundry.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №64343
 17.05.2012
In the contact group dedicated to cooking dishes, comment on "Drink with onions"

I am no longer surprised by that shit. The name "Simple cake with berries" in this group already suggests the presence of guanabans, a couple of kilos of cutting blue whale, feathers from the ass of the Sicilian pavilion and three goats of the old grandmother, taken on July 13, if that day fell on Friday and the air temperature on that day was not above 26 degrees Celsius.

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №64342
 17.05.2012
%girl%97: Greetings to you! )
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
%girl%97: What are you doing?
I turned off the lights and waited for the moment when an adult woman in a mask and uniform would come in, get her pants off and start hurting me.
%girl%97: the perverted
Oh yeah no. I am 29 years old, married and raise a daughter, now lying in the infectious department of the hospital and waiting for the evening antibiotic injection. And you, girl, stop getting acquainted in the aska until you get into the real perverse.

[ + 36 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64341
 17.05.2012
Aksigen78: Yesterday I listened to the coconut. If I believe her, I will live to 53, I will die a little, and then I will live to 97 again. I think she confuses something...

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №64340
 17.05.2012
Stas: I want you
Stas: I want you very much
The window is wrong.
Ask to make a pizza
No, I am not mistaken.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №64339
 17.05.2012
I’ve had spam this morning. Topics of letters:

When to immigrate?
How to restore the body after drinking?
What to do if you are a pedophile?

Message to the Club of Effective Leaders.

[ + 10 - ] Comment quote №64338
 17.05.2012
Random-nick: from lack of food, they die, and from lack of sex, they don’t live.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №64337
 17.05.2012
xxx: hello to me)))

Do you sleep? ?

XXX: Is it for me? I don’t have to ?

xxx: thank you for asking ;)))

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №64336
 17.05.2012
*1*1* (14:23:29 16/05/2012)
I wear a cross and a shirt - I'm a rapper
*2*2* (14:23:46 16/05/2012)
And I have a cock and a fist, I’m a fist.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №64335
 17.05.2012
Shit the fuck!
WOW: Did that happen?
I decided to buy flowers for my girlfriend, I asked to make a beautiful rose.
WOW: Well what?
xxx: turned off for instant and epic file - it air refresher for the toilet its spray start
by :D :D :D
I said, let another fox pair it up, and let me either do a new one, or I do not pay, because to pay one and a half rubles to smell the refresher is the top of the joke.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №64334
 17.05.2012
From VK:

Television for photography - 10 t.r. Map of Mastercard.
Powerful note - 25 t.p. Map of Mastercard.
Planchette transformers - 30 t.p. Map of Mastercard.
Graphic plan - 50 t.p. Map of Mastercard.
The lipstick is invaluable.

[ + 70 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64333
 17.05.2012
Alex: How bad the people are in the depths! He drinks wickedly, but is not spoiled.
I’ve been fishing recently. Near the shore, the local peasants celebrated their birthday. strongly noted. They cleaned each other’s bodies a couple of times. Then they kissed. Then someone drowned away because of unhappy love. All the villages answered. Okay...
Alex: So, when they were about to leave the river, one of the maids began to ask for the back seat of Moskovich. She ran and cried, “Someone, someone, take me from behind!” and nobody, nobody laughed.
Lex32: The Holy People

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