I have a fool friend. He bought a dog and named it Loh. When asked why, he said that everyone would troll on the street, like a loch go here, and then explain that the dog was called. My first walk was a broken nose.

Let’s twist to the "zadalbaykam" forum, well, the strength is no longer, everything is sinking in an unbearably disgusting mess!

In Switzerland opened the world's longest railway tunnel: 57 km
The road to the trains was boiled with holy water by a Catholic priest (this was part of a large performance for spectators and the press, as we see, such a tradition is observed not only before the launches of Russian missiles).

For the sake of justice, next to him is a Jew, a Muslim and a couple of other types, one of which is like a secular. Thus e. The principle of equality of religions is respected. And only Christians carry cadilla missiles into space.

Yyy: Yes, there is a Catholic, a Rabbi, an Imam, and a representative of the secular. But the Protestants refused, entrusting this matter to the Catholics. They do not accept objects to sanctify.

Zzz: Oh, and then they went to the bar?

My wife’s nephew is in kindergarten, he is 4.5 years old. Last week there was a meeting in the kindergarten and parents told about the incident that happened there. In the group, the nephew has one boy, as turned out to be an outstanding personality. At a quiet hour, this boy waited until everyone was asleep and the babysitter with the nurse went somewhere, he quickly put soft toys under the blanket in his place, went and cleaned the bags of the nurse and nurse. Having taken all the money, he went out of the window to the street. There, the guy had a pre-graved cave under the fence, which he turned out to have grown on a walk for two days. After leaving the area of the kindergarten, the guy ran into a nearby shopping center, which has an entire floor of all kinds of children's shops. But because of his age the guy could not foresee that in the shopping center someone will know him from acquaintances and call his parents, so it happened. When he was choosing toys in the children's world, his one was seen by a neighbor and called the parents who came from work, took him by the ear home and ran to find out in the kindergarten. As the boy then told his parents, he planned in the place with the shopping to return to the kindergarten before the end of the quiet hour, and no one would not notice that he was not there.



The result: the chief managed this incident by negotiating with the boy's parents. The teacher and nurse promised to be severely punished.

The young family moved to a house next to the desert. And one day there appeared a brigade of builders who had to build a new house in an empty place.

Of course, the 5-year-old girl was very interested in what was going on there, so she watched the workers all day long.

Eventually, she made friends with the builders, and they began to consider her a kind of talisman of the project. They constantly talked to her, the girl ate lunch with them and even performed small assignments that the builders gave her to make her feel important.

At the end of the first week she was handed a envelope with a salary of $10. The little girl immediately ran to her mother to boast, and the woman offered her daughter to open her own savings account in the bank and put the money there.

The cashier at the bank was very impressed. He asked the girl how she was able to make money at such a young age.

The little girl answered proudly:

“Last week I worked with real builders who are building a house near us.

and oh! The cashier cried. Will you work there next week too?

The girl replied:

- Yes, I will, if, of course, these fools from the building materials warehouse will finally send this fucking plaster!

brought a friend. Further from his words. I work in an alcohol base, selling elite buckles. A new director was appointed, and in order to get acquainted with the team, the director invited all seven managers to go out of town. Everyone came in their own way. The director arranged the place and already covered the table.

There are seven 200-gram glasses on the table.

Significance guys! In one glass of vodka, in all the other water. We drink. I will see who squeezed after vodka - 10% lower.

Everyone raises their glasses. And according to the law of wickedness, I have vodka. I drink, almost coughing at the end.

The director looks at everyone with an eagle’s eye. No one stumbled!

Fuck, and the collective! Everyone had a vodka!

The evening had just begun...

About Communism. The ideal was not hard work, but universal.
From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs.
You can get as many goods as you need.
But where to get so much to get enough for everyone?
The answer is that everyone has to work for this and what to produce.
Therefore, theft is pursued, that the thief only takes, but produces nothing.

A friend of mine got a new job that week.
XHH: I rest like yesterday, it turns out we are working without weekends, this is the turn

<Xilopont> This is a terrible man. He has nothing to teach, I would have forbidden him even to walk in the streets without the accompaniment of sanitary staff with reassuring guns. At one of his lectures, he seriously discussed whether to write a dissertation on the industrial production of apple juice using household washing machines.

I went to Prague to rest. And so that I didn’t get stolen, the wallet was wearing from the front, not the back.

One day, my friends and I got in a row at the store. And I, knocking on the bag on my stomach, jokingly said, "Let the girl with the pregnant wallet go!“”

And the most funny thing is that they all honestly split up and decided to miss me, not immediately I remembered that there were a lot of Russians in Prague. I did not expect such a reaction. She apologized for her behavior and hid behind the back of her friends.

I am a bag mother.

The fact that my computer doesn’t pull 90% of the games has brought much greater benefit to my learning than all the current reforms from the ministry.

Every time, throwing a pack of garbage into the container (they are in the yard with the loops at the top), I remember that in the school of the OBŽ had a rating of 5 for throwing a anti-tank grenade into the tank layout))
This was my childhood at the border of the USSR.

Men vacationers much more often callously silence the presence of a wife, three children, a dog and two cats in their lives)))

And then I realized how obsolete and traditional information I had about the maintenance of pets and the relationship between them and humans.

From the Taxi:

Once I was driving with a taxi driver who told me how he bought the rights. I would rather listen to hunting.)

Over the years of watching series and movies about superheroes, I realized one thing – if a superhero has appeared in your city, it’s time to roll away.

The Moscovites are familiar with the bitter feeling when a gas-byter-plitter became the chief of a whole city.

I went to the barber and cut my hair short. In the evening, coming from work, the husband noticed, but said nothing. After a while, I listened to him talking in half a voice with our York dog:
You knew what she was going to do. Why did you let her go? Why didn’t you bite her leg?

Before I got married, I didn’t know you could put milk in the refrigerator incorrectly.

A real woman is obliged to give a man at his first request.
The Request? Should he still demand? Is the look not enough?

This is by chance not about those girls who after 35-40 begin to flirt at all with all in a row, in the shy hope that they will still marry?
· :
They hope for sex, sometimes quite persistently.