bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №114419
 05.06.2015
Chernobyl and Hiroshima are not identical.
In Japan there were bombs, in Chernobyl - the release of radioactive substance as a result of an accident and fire. Physics of phenomena is different. After the explosion, the area radiates for a second time due to the given radiation, plus a certain number of rapidly decomposing elements. In Chernobyl, the main infection is strontium-90 (half-loss 27 years).
After the bomb, you can begin to return in a year or two, bury the most hidden objects and build houses of imported material. And the backdrop in Pripyat has fallen at least 15 times, it takes more than a hundred years. Approximately so much area and closed.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №114418
 05.06.2015
I shot, but not a buck. Books, but not ours. Our own, but not us. We, but not in "Boeing". In "Boeing" but by chance. It is not counted by chance.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №114417
 05.06.2015
It is strange. I have never seen more sad people than strong believers. Per the believers do not understand Jesus, since he taught to live more interestingly, and they are boring?
____________________________
No, well, at all, the Crusaders-Templarians-Dominican Jesuits at one time did not accidentally burn up for that time.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №114416
 05.06.2015
<+pdc> You are not surprised by the fact that in our favorite in childhood series "Four tankmen and a dog" the name of one tankman Yarosh, and the other - Saakashvili.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №114415
 05.06.2015
I go to work in the morning with a girl in a tram. And since the long-awaited summer has come, a group of children are loaded at one of the stops who are eager to visit the local zoo. After a couple of minutes of traveling in this bullshit, who grabbed his head, the beloved gives out:
How can you talk so much without stopping? The head is already broken.
Did you see yourself from the side?
“Oh... you don’t usually listen to me at all... and you try to keep silent forever! = is

[ + 42 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №114414
 05.06.2015
He who says that Russian and Ukrainian peoples are brotherly is a fool. In fact, it is one people.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №114413
 05.06.2015
Pride

The metro wagon.
People were few, but the seats were all occupied, I sat in a hug with my faithful selfie and dreamed.
On the station entered the pop, the usual pop, thirty years of appearance, no more: from head to foot a black redhead, a beard, a large heavy cross.
Following him entered a woman with a breast baby in her arms (pop did not see her)
I naturally jumped up, said, “Please sit down,” took a step forward and pulled through the pop to touch the woman’s elbow and point to her free seat. But suddenly, the pop wholesomely and powerfully took my hand to the side and with a special church bass loudly and exhortingly said to the whole car:

What are you? Don’t have to, I can stand up. Then sit back!

People around were shaken.
I, despite the attack of laughter, still reached the woman and sat her in her place.

After a few stops, Daddy and I met each other’s eyes and smiled.
He approached closer and with his special church bass quietly said to my ear:

Sorry, it didn’t work well. If I were in a civilian dress, I’t even think you’re addressing me. And thank you.
Me for what?
For helping you see pride in yourself. I’m proud, she’s all to blame.
Well, okay, but we’ve raised people’s mood.
And it is true.

The priest was about to go out and stretched out his hand to say goodbye to me, and I answered and said:

- Since you are so concerned about pride, I will probably not kiss your hand, I will limit myself to a handshake.

In response, a special church bass whispered ordinary human laughter.

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №114412
 05.06.2015
There are three things you can never do in your life: count your hair, wash your eyes with soap, and breathe with your tongue.

Well, everything, you can, squeeze your tongue back, okay.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №114411
 05.06.2015
and brunette:
O_O
When I come to work, I notice that the boss is absent. I ask the designer girl, a blonde, where, say, the boss. She says she’s gone for two days, she’ll come tomorrow. I do not know exactly when.
O_O
— — — —
He left yesterday and will come tomorrow. But at what time she will arrive, she doesn’t know.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №114410
 05.06.2015
Jesus appeared to convince them that life could be more interesting.
and...
It is strange. I have never seen more sad people than strong believers. Per the believers do not understand Jesus, since he taught to live more interestingly, and they are boring?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №114409
 05.06.2015
AK90: The New Murphy Law. You can sit in your room playing/watching a movie and not be needed by any of the households for hours. But if on the screen at this point the only love scene for the whole plot lasting 30 seconds or the same 30 seconds of the final roll of the game finally passed - you need everything. Someone will definitely break into your room with "Oh, so that’s what you’re looking at, pornography what"or "Who’s running out of it? and what? You’re playing all kinds of stuff". I have not violated the law in 10 years. :)

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №114408
 05.06.2015
Oh! I am not against. I will vote for Shaw!
GDP is a former chekist, and Shoigu is a former savior. The attitude toward people is appropriate.
— — — —
I will vote, I will vote ?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №114407
 05.06.2015
To soothe the controversy about viruses and antibiotics, I will say simply. Viruses are not alive. They don't have "bio", so antibiotics have nothing to do with them. The minimum unit of life is a living cell. And the virus is only a destructive "program" in the protein shell. Without the cell, the virus cannot reproduce. Unfortunately, there are no proven data on the actual effectiveness of any antiviral drug.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №114406
 05.06.2015
Nicole under the mattress.
There is a straw, but he
He sleeps like a whistle in my ear.
A stupid senseless man.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №114405
 05.06.2015
I will add, it is essential:
= = = =
Explain the law by which they are fired because of photos on social networks.
— — — —
Have you heard that there will be a Jewish pogrom soon?
I’m not afraid, I’m Russian.
- Idiots, they will be beaten not by passport, but by mouth!

And he is not fired by law, but because he is a rat. Most often, the rat is intelligently explained, and she is fired at her own will.
= = = =
He was fired for being a stupid rat. Often purchased hospital is understood to the boss... well. Well I bought. He is on the sea, he is with him.
But if he, the employee, got enough of the hobbit to post photos, then it is easier to break up with him than to expect him to put the office in the same way. Imho

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №114404
 05.06.2015
M Voegel: Gentlemen
M Voegel: How do you deal with neuroses?
Mordashka: I am crying :))))
Mordashka: and Noah)))
Mordashka: after a while it passes :)
Anton G. Kuznetsov: I speak the pirates bleach
Anton G. Kuznetsov: and we are working on it.
Shiva1: I start every morning by approaching every object in the room and saying, “Go naked!”
shiva1: for some time I let go, and it's getting easier to live on.
M Voegel: I understand, if at least one responds, then neurosis can be considered schizophrenia

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №114403
 05.06.2015
In the beginning, the jeans were wrapped.
XHH: Now began to turn off the shorts.
HH: What will happen next?
Tagged with: shorts

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №114402
 05.06.2015
We now have an admin thinking about the problem:
a snapshot called "bad" or which is called "pizdec"

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №114401
 05.06.2015
On the condominal topic:
1st The condor should be installed in the right place, and the room should be of the appropriate size. The area per workplace with VDT or PEVM for adult users should be at least 6,0 square meters, and a volume of at least 20,0 cubic meters.
2nd If the air conditioner blows on a person, it will naturally overcool.
Three Despite the fact that the air conditioner is installed, the room should be ventilated, and hot air will come from the street.

So, some fans of air conditioners are fools finished. If the condor blows on a person, and you are hot - change places with him. He will be grateful to you and you will be cool. But you don’t want it, it’s your place (under the sun/at the window). If there are people who, by production need, spend 2 hours in the car or on the street in the heat, and then 30 minutes in the office, he will get sick if he goes from 30 degrees into the room from 19-22 and where he blows. There are people with poor health, and they really get sick. If you cheat on all these arguments, you are a fool.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №114400
 05.06.2015
This is:
Before fighting for gay rights, is it not better to think of the blind, the deaf, the one-legged, and so on? In Europe, comfortable conditions are created for them, and gays are not forgotten. And we, in the depths, have no elementary pedestrian transition for them, let alone social rehabilitation.
____________________________

I will reveal the secret:
in our country and in large cities conditions for the blind, deaf, one-legged, etc. No is.

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