bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №129013
 04.06.2016
Love against calculation.
Will there be female candidates? 28 years old, wellined but not beautiful, 2-2.5 thousand. U is. Every month, and all ahead in financial terms. There are no children, an apartment, in the prospect of buying a house. The character is not heavy, but in case of difficulties at work I can hardly pay attention for weeks.
Requirements: care for the house, cooking-washing-cleaning-other (calling a housewife or ordering food without mutual consent is deducted from the content). Sometimes you will have to sit next to me until I fall asleep, make a coffee and say that I’m smart, beautiful and I’ll get everything done (honesty is not required), call a doctor and take care in case of illness.
To sleep with me, in every sense, is not necessarily a separate room can provide. Observe hygiene, take care of yourself, be able to support a conversation (themes range from astronomy and literature to cartoons and fairy tales). Don’t drive lovers into the house. Marriage and romance in the form of "I love, I cannot" - not to offer.

I don’t leave contacts here while I just study the market.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129012
 04.06.2016
Looking at the mess that mankind has done on an infinitely small, on the scale of the universe, piece of matter called the planet Earth, you involuntarily come to the conclusion: the rumors about the divine nature of man are greatly exaggerated.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №129011
 04.06.2016
Notice that some of the search results are hidden in accordance with the Federal Law of 13.07.2015 No. 264-ФЗ.

/////////////////////////////////////

This is the most valuable! with Varese and so on. He works on Hurricane.
Go by the name of this link and you get a concentrate of links to the desired info. And don't have to go, look for it - everything has already been checked for you.

[ + 18 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129010
 04.06.2016
30 years old with a hundred a month.
Ready to sit on your farm in every sense at least now. Not proud at all, I clean well, cook great, do massages, lick everything, support for life. The figure is excellent, especially the pop, the face is ordinary, well-maintained and smooth. You don’t need an iPhone, a sea, a shirt or a catch. 21 years, technical education, red diploma, gold medal, work remotely in an international corporation.
I understood your conditions, my conditions – you tolerate both my lovers and one mistress.
Manic-depressive psychosis and taking antidepressants/neuroleptics depending on the phase
With love, your Dolcinia.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №129009
 04.06.2016
Response to "Spring":

Very different people leave, as a rule, those who do not have very much in their homeland, but, due to some narrowness, they are looking for a reason in everything but themselves.

In my homeland I paid 100k rubles a month, in foreign countries I paid 10k backs. I look for the reason in myself.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №129008
 04.06.2016
Do you know a lot of such naive idiots who are willing to go on a temporary job?

Not much
Even the company knew who was looking for such for another company, more.
And among them were both honest fools and very promising people. Many of the promising ones were stuck and arranged for a permanent vacancy when vacancies appeared.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №129007
 04.06.2016
I write to my husband Mimi: "I adore you"
He: "Is everything okay with the car?"
111: RRRRRRRRRRRR
222: Feel the experience )))

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №129006
 04.06.2016
I was looking for a wife. legal and in the future. After three attempts, he abandoned the case.
Explain to me not far away. Will I get this decor at home if I can invite a cleaner for a dozen? I do the cleaning and cooking myself. And I find it strange that in a month I bring her half-year income and go clean the apartment and cook to eat. You know, I didn’t catch the girl.
And yes, I am not a 40-year-old boss. I am 28 years.

Why do you talk about money all the time? What do you want to buy for them? The love?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №129005
 04.06.2016
The culinary page:

xxx: What is the name of food "all without"? Meaning of vegan? In Thailand it is J. And in China?
Yyy: And in China it is called - the damned Hindu came to India :).

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №129004
 04.06.2016
From the reply to mail.ru:
- what is the name of the song there singing up yuu out yuu and then typing there there there there there there taram?
DJ Snake, AlunaGeorge – You Know You Like It
Thank you very much!! Finally

This is Kaaak? How do they do it? Sometimes I feel like they are specifically arranged to troll us (

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №129003
 04.06.2016
Max Art: The Preamble. I have a "smart clock" and geolocation in the TLF included. He read me "for a long time" and then gives clues. I’m not a paranoid, I don’t wear a foil hat, it doesn’t annoy me.
Max Art: A tip type your bus 20 minutes to home
Max Art: or "After half an hour the end of the working day, to the house 57 minutes"
Max Art is fabulous.
Max Art on Friday. End of working day. I’m sitting at work, the clock usually vibrated on my wrist.
Max Art: I think it’s time to go home. Watching - to the Birmingham (my favorite bar) - 47 minutes
Even Google knows I’m an alcoholic.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №129002
 04.06.2016
This is:
and Oga. Sit down and look at the 30 year old? 😉 Going on vacation to dig potatoes?

Why go straight away? Thirty-year-old women don’t know how to rest well, you think? I am 31 and we just returned from vacation, where we walked 500km around Spain, with tents and bedrooms. Are your 20-year-olds weak? and 😉

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №129001
 04.06.2016
XXX is. Advice the book. How to get rid of complexes and become confident. thank you.
YYY is. I remember something like that. How to sublimate existential thirst into a multi-hour jet orgasm? Mitochondria are coming to help". It is?


[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №129000
 04.06.2016
Have you noticed that women’s salesmenness annoys men only as long as these women are not in their pockets?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №128999
 04.06.2016
In the mid-century I worked as an ambulance sanitary in the outbound brigade. Winter and the epidemic. All brigades: linear, BITAM and obstetric – were given pediatric calls. Delays up to 4 hours. The cries and screams of parents. Not the essence.
The challenge is: a child. The temperature. It does not fail.
In fact: a very serious five-year-old girl with a temperature of 39, excited parents.
The doctor writes a map. I picked the “Troika.” Injection of the patient. I feel sorry for the children first. But what to do? The girl quietly (the jaw is compressed) lies with her face in the pillow, drops her socks. Pope with fist. My mom quipped. I give an injection. The child didn’t even bite. The girl pulls her socks, and her face is still in the pillow. Sitting for 15 minutes. The doctors will understand what. A girl in her pillow.
We give recommendations. We are going to leave. Mother says, “Daughter, what do doctors need to say? They are leaving.” The silence of 5 seconds. A loud voice from the pillow said, “Daddy!“!”
We continue to treat the children.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №128998
 04.06.2016
Request in Google:
"Where in Mordovia can you normally sit with friends?"
by 0.33 sec. 15 colonies and 10 settlements were found.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №128997
 04.06.2016
Why go to the distance for a half-stage?Did I get up earlier and work more than I did when I was in the office? What understatement at all?

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №128996
 04.06.2016
>>>If you don’t want to start first, then why are you so worried that someone is trying to put a defense?

Read Hitler’s statement on the attack on the USSR on June 22, 1941 and count how many times the word “defense” and its derivatives appear in the text.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №128995
 04.06.2016
Psychiatric Bays

I met here yesterday with my friend and colleague, Vladislav Yuryevich, and talked. The case was near one of the city's clinics, and we watched a security guard chase the men from the backdoors to smoke somewhere away. Vladislav Yuryevich nodded his head and thoughtfully said:

Peter the First taught us to smoke tobacco in order to be like Europe. The current government is trying to teach us to smoke to make us look like Europe again. We are not similar to Europe. Maybe it’s not about tobacco?

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №128994
 04.06.2016
Oh! and may be a firefighter rescue masha (feminists passionately fight for the abolition of the law prohibiting women to be rescuers / firefighters). The burning house will wait, the victims in the accident too - Masha chooses children's food.

If a firefighter (and not a firefighter, read and feel the difference), then there will be someone to replace at the beginning of the shift, and not when a roasted cock clings in the ass.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna