bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115279
 25.06.2015
All my life I thought of myself as a piranha, until I got an office shredder in my hands.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №115278
 25.06.2015
Once 10 years ago, when two of my acquaintances gave birth to daughters at 16 years old, I thought of their daughters: "The program at least - to finish school, get the certificate and not give birth during this time.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №115277
 25.06.2015
Max Olin
by 9 h. Yekaterinburg, Sverdlovsk Oblast ·

Until yesterday, I would estimate the chances of hiding from the rains in an unknown bakery with black rashman as minimal.

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №115276
 25.06.2015
I have the feeling that Martin has hamsters with the names of the PliP heroes. You understand the principle...

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №115275
 25.06.2015
It is said that “the Constitution is written with blood.”
And cookbooks, as I suspect, are written with diarrhea...

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115274
 25.06.2015
by marmy62: delmar
"router which is needed" naming topics on forum dns)))
And the second part"Router and the Secret Proxy""Router and the Philosophical User"
by Delmar :D

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115273
 25.06.2015
So it was already:

Instead of the "motivation folder" I now read the "motivation stick".
This says a lot about my motivation.

The Stick for Motivation is the Stimulus

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №115272
 25.06.2015
xxx: A. I totally accidentally stumbled on them - in search of pictures :)
YYY: It happens
I found this hotel :)
yyy: ok google: bungalow on the shore of the ocean Sri Lanka
XXX is a good way :)
Google: Find me a girlfriend
YYY: Sort by price? and :)
XXX: by Reviews

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №115271
 25.06.2015
Hi, I am Andrew!
J: I am pleased
M: It is very pleasant!

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №115270
 24.06.2015
The king called Ivanushka the fool and said:
If you don’t bring two speaking birds tomorrow, I’ll cut off my head.
Ivan brought phyllin and vortex. The King says:
Let them say something.
Ivan asks :
What was vodka in the store before?
The whore:
and chiric.
by Ivan Phillip:
“And you, Philine, confirm it.
by Philin:
I confirm it.

And then, my invisible, says: "And what, Philin says ‘I confirm’?"

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115269
 24.06.2015
"Is this an event?"- said the woman: "This is just a case in our lives!"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №115268
 24.06.2015
xxx: You know, when I was on a long-term trip to Almaty, my dinner usually consisted of a bottle of port wine
Sometimes I get drunk...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №115267
 24.06.2015
From the worker:
Why are you asking me about this, do you use this shit?
You are writing that shit!
Why are you ordering such shit?

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115266
 24.06.2015
Gaurven: I complain to a girlfriend in the ash, that other moms do not communicate on the site, it is boring to walk. He advises: watch out who is dressed like and shake up with a shrug about the shirts. I watched. One of them has a picture of a favorite York, the other has a straw from Versace, and the third has the inscription "I love cats". And I sit in the "Cisco" maque, it’s white, it’s not hot. Yes, I think the protocols do not match. And then we had a disconnect nipple happened, and it didn’t happen before that.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №115265
 24.06.2015
Queen B#$D and the betrayer of the Motherland
......
The motherland of the queen is Spain, she was married against her will, the king did not put her in a penny, and she lived in constant fear for her life. Would she be concerned about the interests of France?

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115264
 24.06.2015
Read and understand are different things. It's like a movie about d'Artagnan - you can enjoy battles on swords and horse chases at 10 years old, but to see that the queen is a b#$d and a traitor to the Motherland, Constance - the fifth column, and d'Artagnan - an unprincipled sperm toxicologist, who sold the Motherland and the king for his grandmother - it already takes some experience and there may even be the help of other people who will open their eyes to the obvious and simple story of how they jumped on horses and flogged on swords.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №115263
 24.06.2015
In our case, the accounting department also considered itself the most important department until the order came to optimize the state.
-------
Give me a guess - half were fired, the remaining were hijacked with all the work for the same money, they were fired themselves, and your firm gave outsourcing accounting? And now it is done by the same people as before, but working in a specialized accounting firm, and much more expensive?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №115262
 24.06.2015
It is very strange to get something in the pharmacy as a gift.
xxx: and it would be condoms as part of some social action, or pills for brain work
XXX: Even though there is an interesting social action...

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №115261
 24.06.2015
Mom is angry.

What’s the fun of taking the same jacket as me and imitating help? This is why doctors always have two surgeons on the operation! One operates and the other does not interfere.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №115260
 24.06.2015
Gaurven: Usually under the windows are painted on the asphalt "Good morning, dear!", "Washa, I love you!" and so on. Today I saw the inscription: "Antonov, return 3000 rubles, or it will be worse!".

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna