The chief in the morning drew all kinds of eastern sweets, sits down slowly eating. The accountant comes in, looks up and says:
What’s delicious, what’s not calorie?? to
The leader with a quiet voice, not moving away from the monitor:
The plate...

Well, comrades students, from next semester we start studying?

Listen, if there is a concept of “brain assault,” then should there be brain assault planes?
yyy: brainstormers, brainstormers, brainstormers and brainstormers. I know a few people =))

Yesterday my cat walked into a textbook on higher mathematics, I had never had such solidarity with an animal.

A friend recently arrived. The owner looks around the table.
Having seen an unprecedented device - a tablet, grabs it and tries to put it on the floor: "This is the weights, right?"
I’m in full horror...I succeeded!

Valyard: During my six years at the university, judging by my remaining knowledge, I studied only yupology, yupography, yupometria and a little yuposophy.

I’ve seen a lot... but in order to use ArtMoney to try to increase the download speed displayed in the browser...

By the way, do you know who the Southern young people are talking about "fuck panda"? About moscovites who come to the south and sunbath in sunglasses. About a week later, they have circles around their eyes that are typical for the panda.

Did you know that if the smiley """ distinguishes a two-point, it will be a ninja turtle?

I got up at five in the morning to repeat the exam. In aska, he writes a predicate, which in 4 hours to give an ex.
Good morning, why am I not asleep?
I: Hi, yes, I decided to repeat the lecture before your exam.
P: This is the pace you will learn until Monday.
I: Alexey Mikhailovalch, as you will tell you, we don’t have the exam on Monday, but today, at 9 a.m., to be precise.
Is it sixth today?
A: Fuck it
Q: What a fool put on Saturday
If I wake up, I will come.

I went to the clinic today. Guess to whom:

by Зав. The House of M.D.

I said straight slowly, “Hello Gregory,” he said, “Your house is shit, and his name is Michael.”

Examination of mathematical analysis.
The Teacher:
What would you do if I asked you to calculate the amount?
The student:
I will hang myself!
The Teacher:
Okay, he doesn’t get along.

A. N My boss is 53 years old.

A. NOhhhhhhhhhh!by 11
Tagged with: o_o
A. NOhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! to
I am... already.
A. N A prize for you!!! to

What about Max? When will he return from the army?
When was he in the army? O_O
I saw in his photo where he was in shape.
WOW: Well and what? I was photographed in a musketer costume as a child, I am not a boyar!

One day I walk in the street, a girl in front of me on the cell phone says:
"Listen, you’re talking to me that way??? We slept with you, why are you talking to me??"
In a few seconds:
"A... well yes, we slept..."

Yesterday I listen to the weather forecast on the radio (city).The dictator lists the cities, calls the temperature-I miss everything by the ears,because I am interested in the weather only in St. Petersburg...And here I waited-in St. Petersburg the weather is the same as in Vladivostok...."Well, isn’t it?? to

The head of the Ministry of Internal Affairs wants to get rid of anonymity on the Internet
Nooze: In turn, now the anonymous on the Internet want to get rid of the head of the Ministry of Internal Affairs

by Kotya:
You are where?? to
and ZXC:
I have a shit with the moustaches.
by Kotya:
Your revelations, Alexander, scare me.
and ZXC:
I cut off when I shaved.

About pedestrians and drivers:

In order to drive, it is necessary to have the rights and KNOW the PD (ideally, of course - exclude unicoms, who buy the rights and chase the streets, without even suspecting that there are rules). However, pedestrians are not required to know the PDD, and in some situations they begin to water drivers passing through the pedestrian crossing on a green light for pedestrians. They, unhappy, do not even realize that if the car is stuck in the center of the crossroads, missing the opposing cars, it must STOP the maneuver, even if it is already on the red light. And pedestrians, seeing the green for themselves, immediately break on the road (and sometimes without waiting), thereby creating emergency-dangerous situations, not missing the "later" cars.

Bring it to the best plz, maybe at least someone’s brains will add...

Plague rappers glorify the lives of snoopers, prostitutes and ordinary members of street gangs. At the same time, they are convincingly asking to buy their albums exclusively legally.

by Kudos R/L