bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 22 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129333
 12.06.2016
and Vanguard. The population will tear their ass off the couch and go vote for the party coming to power under the slogan “We will abolish all the laws passed after 91 years.”

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №129332
 12.06.2016
I teach my son to go to the toilet, not to the pot. He sat down, sat down a little and said, “Dad, can you read the newspaper?”

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129331
 12.06.2016
In Peter lives a grandmother who claims to have lost a paper with a poem... My flesh.
And Loza did not write anything, just picked up a leaflet in the Metro.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №129330
 12.06.2016
When the wife asks, “What do you want for dinner?“I never guess.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №129329
 11.06.2016
The movie search. Review of the film "Nude in a Hat". It is five, I think.

...In the editorial office of the newspaper “Women’s Day” happens. Under the cover of the night, the unknown kidnapped from his own apartment photo reporter Kosty Telegin (Andrei Smolyakov), who was supposed to hand over an exposing article about the city's sultanates N. Kosty is held in a country house in unbearable conditions for the Soviet man (whisky, serviettes, beautiful women, imported furniture), offering to conclude a deal with conscience and help underground pornographers in their difficult, but such fascinating business. Kostia properly eats and drinks, but refuses to cooperate, motivating his refusal to relate to illegal business.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №129328
 11.06.2016
Facebook: You can’t get up? Do you jump more than 5 cm? Is it already at the first mile of distance? No trouble! Get rid of the dot, the counter, or, forgive gods, the tanks! There is a celebration in your street.
In Russia, cyber sport is recognized as an official sport.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №129327
 11.06.2016
It uses two generators of 512 kW each. The total capacity is 1 MW.

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129326
 11.06.2016
News about the unmanned tractor:

XXX is Harvest. have survived.
yyy: In the realities of our country, this harvester will have to attach a couple more devastators, or the freemans will pick up the spare parts.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №129325
 11.06.2016
The story of a blonde brunette. 6 in the morning, I have an examination at 8 p.m. in the universe, I didn't sleep all night, studied textbooks, my eyes practiced with a redish shade. On the eve, my husband and I bought a large inflatable mattress, the highest, the most expensive. Well, having the habit of chewing on the bed, I take a white shirt from the closet, I throw it on the mattress, I turn on the mattress... you understood the end of the story.my husband woke up from the fact that with a whistle fell to the floor... such a mat I did not hear from him))) By the way, I passed the exam at 5, from anger on myself))

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №129324
 11.06.2016
I met a girl yesterday. They drank beer) Overall, everything was pleasant until it turned out that she had HIV and schizophrenia :\ Then another one was pulled. A slightly thicker, but wrapped me in "female warmth". And only I started enjoying when it turned out that she had a husband and he was sitting. A double epic file in one night.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №129323
 11.06.2016
Here do not guess... horoscope for all signs living in Russia for 2016-2017... stay here, good mood... no money!!! to

[ + 20 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129322
 11.06.2016
In the modern world, I am bustling. In Russian, it is a curse.

[ + 23 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129321
 11.06.2016
bibliophile

Wow: I don’t know about Maine Kampf, but I have the "Witch Hammer" in a beautiful gift edition. Donzova compared to him is a literary genius.

“The Witch Hammer” is just a manual. You are waiting for a twisted plot, intrigues from the banal instructions from the microwave.
P.S Try to read Mein Kampf. If in the course of reading to replace “German” with “Russian” is especially good. Therefore it is prohibited.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №129320
 11.06.2016
The hoolops laughed at the king’s face:

"We were shown today apartments of 20 square meters, it seems funny, but people are buying such housing, and it is very popular and there is a niche of such housing on the market," Shuvalov said.

According to the declaration of Igor Shuvalov, he has four apartments in Russia with an area from 73.8 to 175.7 square meters. In addition, he rents a house in Austria (1 480 square meters) and rents an apartment in the UK, which is 483 square meters. Shuvalov admitted that the estate in Austria he leases from a firm that belongs to his wife.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №129319
 11.06.2016
1: This can be said about everything in a row. You can not discuss books, movies, anime, work, relationships, news. Why did you decide to focus on the game?

Well, to show how serious he is, an adult who lives a full life. " and games? by PF! I have things to do and more important".

Third: And he went to shrink on the pony.

[ + 27 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129318
 11.06.2016
About Countries
It all depends on the habits of the family.
One of my friends put the counters and began to pay more than she had previously paid according to the norms.
They and their son are used to open the water with a strong pressure and stand in front of the mirror. She can wash the dishes and then go on the phone to talk without turning off the water.
Therefore, look at your habits - if you know how to close the crane while brushing your teeth, then the counter will be beneficial for you.

[ + 9 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129317
 11.06.2016
A typical Western consumer is quite different.

He has been filled since childhood, and he does not need anything in the material sense. He is not interested in the gold ring in his nose, and the most expensive limousine is not interested either. Because it is hemorrhoids. And black caviar with spoonfuls he does not want to eat, because it is harmful. He’s a very practical guy, this Western consumer. To convince him to consume what is unclear why it is necessary, you have to pour ebony money into advertising. Moreover, it is necessary to convince him not that it is cool, but that it is convenient, useful and saving time.

You ask, why is he a consumer? Why does he consume so much when the material is so little? And it consumes the whole world around it, primarily in the form of impressions. He has such consumer spiritual requests: everywhere to ride, everywhere to blow his curious nose, to participate in everything unusual.
Well, also, of course, self-realization: sex, family, children, interesting work, artistic self-activity, tourism, all that. This is the average Western consumer.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №129316
 11.06.2016
X: Will we have a meeting?
When did you plan?
When are you more comfortable?
There are two Jews :D

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №129315
 11.06.2016
The 2016 World Cup begins with the match France-Romania.
Negroes are playing with Gypsies.
This is the European Championship :)

[ + 39 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129314
 11.06.2016
While I was in the army, my girlfriend gave up on the rights, lost weight, found a bad job, enrolled in the second higher.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Everything you need to know about the army.

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