A car mechanic calls a girl from the regular:

Q: Hi, my car suddenly became powerful and sporty, I’m even afraid to ride it! Come and see, please.

B: Do you have Deu Matisse? Strange, I’ll come here tonight and see.

Half a day he broke his head, what happened to the matizik, came, went, so is - the glue was pierced.

In the year 98 or 99 I had an easy operation under local anesthesia. Before the operation, I did some type of injection (it seemed to be about atropine) so that I wasn’t afraid. When the injection worked, my head went round like a solid portion of alcohol and I really got all the pofig. In the operating room they were told to dress naked, and there are nurses, including youngsters. I have an injection! Away with doubt! I lay down on the operating table, made a local anesthesia and, as I started the operation, the surgeons asked me to tell something, apparently in order to monitor the patient’s condition. I have an injection! And I didn’t come up with anything better than telling all the time, while the operation was going (about half an hour), jokes about bad doctors.

From which region is this Mizulina most chosen? Do not chase, call back! She is inadequate.

XXX: He still likes to refer to all sorts of scientists, such as a Nobel laureate in 1957 showed that the earth in space moves in a spiral, revolving around the sun in motion.
XXX: That’s how you read and think, okay, right. You do not hear
A simple calculation suggests that this means that the hair on the ass of African children is curled in the reverse of the hair on the ass of children in the Yamal-Nenets district.
XXX: And you sit and run around just
XXX: Not anything to object - even the hz as a general brain to turn back on after such a sketch

A new way to fight mosquitoes
Turn off the light in the kitchen and open the refrigerator.

>> Brother, you won't believe - after marriage - the same! I want to fuck...

> by what principle are you married at all?! to

Choose the most terrible monster, of course. One recently wrote off about something stinking and slippery instead of a partner. And so colorful that I remembered the popular horrors of the 70s.

Russia will pay pensions to former Soviet citizens living in Israel.
Well, you stay there...

See also 20533:

The taxi driver must have a taxi meter on. Payment must be taken strictly by the counter.
He is obliged to deliver. If he says that he is not there, let him change (wherever, in any tent or store).
If the taxi driver refuses, call the dispatcher. You can go straight now.
In our case, the complaint to the dispatcher is working on a hurricane. Moreover, if the taxi driver did not turn on the meter or he broke, fell, accidentally turned off, the driver says directly - you can not pay at all.
Do not be afraid to insist on your own and complain. You will have to be less overwhelmed.
Z is. And also, there was a great benefit, a taxi with terminals to pay by card.

I watched the show "How it was arranged". It turns out in the backward country of the United States on pedestrian crossings installed LED lamps. If a citizen wants to cross the road in the dark hours of the day, then press a button and light bulbs on the road sign and along the perimeter of the pedestrian crossing. The primitive society. It is necessary to punish the poor for not having reflective blankets on their clothes.

According to the principle of "with this lady so ohuenno", but nobody guarantees that after the stamp, the ohuenity settings will not fly.

From life with fools fly not only adjustments
Both are to blame.
Not just a grandmother.

In the attachment...
Fuck my fuck.
The country of old women and wool.

Cat riding on robot vacuum cleaners? ha ha! She pulls out her socks from the closet and drops them on the floor. Clara Zacharovna is pressed by them and mourns complainingly, and the cat rolls next to the view of the winner.

Discussion in the blog of new spacious seats in the airline cabin for first-class passengers.

xxx: It would be better to develop VIP rescue seats, according to the type of fighter, looking over the years, the technology would be cheaper and similar seats began to be put on ordinary passengers.
YYY: For the start, you can complete the parachutes already starting.
zzz: It’s all been wasted and calculated for a long time, not profitable. It makes flights safer.
YYY: So this is not for profit, but for the pleasure of packs. Compared to the cost and volume of this luxury - in general, the parachute is small.
zzz: The problem is that throwing out two dozen parachutes from a crashing aircraft is a non-trivial task.
YYY: And why throw them away?! This is for reassurance.
ZZZ is 5+! cynicism above all. =)))) They can still be glued for reliability.
YYY: Of course to stick. So that the packs from the lower classes are not taken away from the VIPs.

I go with the boss on the street.
The boss, looking at the young trees:
Look at the three youths! (The tree is silver, the tree is silver)
A drunk voice from the bushes:
Where did you see the third?! to

The ability of a woman to offend in a flat place is a useful skill developed in the course of evolution.

I have married neighbors, both under a forty-hour, and here somehow I’m cooking dinner, looking out the window, and they’re running around the street, in pyjamas and barefoot, with water pistols, splashing on each other and whispering so loudly that I suddenly came across that I’m wasting time trying to build a perfect relationship, when in reality I just need a man who will laugh with me for the rest of my life.

From the newspapers: "The State Duma has introduced a bill on criminal liability for inclination to suicide and assistance to it."
Interesting, and the establishment of the size of pensions and the cost of housing services will fall under this article?

As a child, my father forbade me to dive from various winds in running water. Of course I did not listen to him. The bottom is pierced twenty times, what can there be?! to

A cold, very muddy river with a fast flow and decent depth on the shore. From a rough slope made a dive. We froze and went to the fire.

After a while, a guy approaches (we are still at the fire) and jumps a little from the diving. It flows half alive. In the end, the guy has a few seams on his head. And under the tower was a flooded pine brought by the flow.

I had to work in the "nuts" trading network. I went to check out another store. A strict inspector asks if the sellers have checked the expiration date on the labels. I think about myself that it’s worth paying attention to nuts, once they’re worried about their deadline.. And I hear the seller’s answer: "Wsë okay, I recently sent it to the repairs". Oh, that’s it, and I thought.

And let the lawyers of the couch rush unwise to the nearest barrel, after their unnecessary Orbit or Snickers, and give me my 105 rubles and no longer get exhausted!
......
Only then will you run into the camp, because the duty to ensure the surrender lies on you. Buy the exchange in the bank, as normal shops do. You are obliged to pay up to the last penny.