bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №6363
 04.06.2008
that is. Your ability to explain is strictly limited to my ability to understand, and at the intersection of two sets there is such a basic element as babybe.

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №6362
 04.06.2008
The brother burned...
I sit behind the compound, he moves somewhere.
I ask: Where did you go?
He goes to Narnia and enters the closet.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №6361
 04.06.2008
300159 (22:20:58 2/06/2008)
The current for a moment distracted from the diploma to look at VKontakte, and here Bach is already half eleven and I play a stalker!!! to

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №6360
 04.06.2008
Well, which fox hanged in the working machine instead of a refresher "ealock", a flavored ganglion?! to

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №6359
 04.06.2008
I am abandoned by my bride because of my work, because I am gone, and I disappear all day at work.
Mary I love you!Bring me to the top please, sorry.
The Senate.

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №6358
 04.06.2008
Just in the office, I go to the toilet, near the pissuar, the chief of the OMTS stands, answers on the mobile phone with a serious voice:
Sergey Petrovich is. I’m here... Okay... I’ll go now.
I asked him: Have you moved? and :)

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №6357
 04.06.2008
XXX: He seemed strange when he put both the rings on my finger.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №6356
 04.06.2008
Talent is a gift to one for all, and when it is only for oneself, it is a gift.

Just a trick.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №6355
 04.06.2008
The personal case



In the distant times, when restructuring was already in the air, but not yet.

I frequently traveled to Donetsk for patent matters.

Sometimes I was settled in the hotel of the Donetsk Scientific Center. After the loud

The name “hotel” hid one floor of a nine-storey dormitory for

Graduate students and research staff – dark concrete box with rooms

along long naked corridors painted with dirty dirty white paint and

The smell of chlorine.



Nevertheless, I liked living there. The building was in several

districts from the city centre and on the edge of the city park. Several times to me

Luckily, she went out to the park. From my balcony.

The green is visible, the pond, which the locals called the bet, the wheel of observation.

On the back of this cute decoration, old terricons were seen. People in

The guesthouses were mostly polite and sober. Even the warriors who are

Cerberos in such places, here were distinctly welcoming and

Relatively soft temper.



That time I got to Donetsk in the late autumn, when there are no greens anymore.

naked branches somewhere dirty clothes hang the broken leaves, and over

The city is steadily hanging smelly smog, coating with sticky moisture. The book I

I took boring with me, the movies in the cinemas went all the old, to the opera I was

then indifferent and even my favorite entertainment on business trips –

Walking through the streets and looking at the city was completely inaccessible.

On the third day I saw an advertisement on the door of the elevator. Administration of

He invited all residents to the Red Corner for personal examination.

S. N. S. Cologne B. A. Doing so much was not something that I

I decided to go without expecting anything interesting. and drunk.

A man, well, a man with whom it does not happen.



As strange as it is, this event was not only interested in me. K is

At first, a small room was filled with thirty people, some even didn’t.

Enough of chairs. What a witch, I thought, it was not.

A dissident? In the meantime, an uncolored blonde came out on the tribune.

Clothes that always open the meeting.

“Today we came here,” he said, “to resolve the issue of

Further residence of the senior scientific employee of Kolodyazhny Boris

Andreevich in the Academic Hostel. If he were a miner, it would be a conversation.

The other. But if the senior scientist, the candidate of science insults

Companions in the performance of their duties, you need to address

The attention. We invite representatives of the Donetsk Scientific Center.

and scientific community. Now I give the word to the commander.

by Vasily Gavrilovich.



On the stage rose an elderly dry-haired man with a tough, as if cut off

From granite to face. It was clearly written on this face that he

The owner is a lieutenant colonel or even a retired colonel.

He served the whole great homeland in Smershe. He began his speech with

A general assessment of the situation in the theatre of war.

— You can say, — said the commander, — that the rules of residence are violated.

All residents on top. They come after 11 p.m. and drink alcohol.

drinking, playing cards, bringing animals, installing heating systems

devices, use electric boilers and boilers. I walked yesterday.

From the back of the building I was entrusted, water was poured out on me from the ninth floor.

The tea. A woman was poured out, and no women were written there. especially

People who occupy individual rooms. A witch, a woman too.

brought...



He took a pause and moved to the main item on the agenda:

Last Tuesday, at 8:15 p.m., the watchman called me. speaks

The magician from 311 came with a strange woman. I said,

I asked for a passport, and he looked at me so much that I was afraid that he would strike.

Stupid, I say to her and immediately jumped, I live in the neighboring house. He rose up,

They knock – they do not respond. I opened my key, no.

It opens. The castle was changed. Then I say, Open up, O Wicked,

I will call the police. He sent me motherly. Here it goes:

He brought a strange man, and we have people with permissions.

This is once. Changed the castle, restricted the commander's access. It is two. sent by

Me in execution. These are three. I submitted a report to the Scientific Center.

The expulsion. I have everything.

Who wants to speak? Asked the inconspicuous.

- Let's listen to the magician himself, he suggested some very

A quiet person from the room.



I expected a strong blonde with grey eyes to appear now.

Burning brunette with luxurious beards and proud posture. Hard on stage.

A young man with a barrel and a stick. He literally

He was wearing his legs in impeccable orthopedic shoes.

Imagine a person who was partially paralyzed as a child.

You will understand what we are talking about.



“Look at me,” he began with a deaf voice. I am 42 years old, I

The Disabled. Do you think it’s easy to meet a woman?

It went through the hall.

But I met! The speaker was pleased and

I thought it was easy for me to convince a woman to come into this place.

The barracks?

No is! Strongly confirmed the room.

But she agreed! I thought it was easy to buy chocolate candy.

A bottle of champagne after 6 p.m.

No is! He walked out of the room as one man.

But I bought them at a restaurant, gave them thirty-five rubles! This is when we

We drank champagne and it started what it was all about.

The commander began to knock at the door.



Inflammatory cheeks s. n. s. Koloyazhnyh broke down, shoulders broke up,

His voice sounded like a bell, the cradle in his strong hand seemed to be

The sword of a rich man.

“Yes, I sent the commander to the shit, and I would send him again! Is it

Would anyone in this room have done differently in my place?

No is! He blasted the room so that the glass was shaken and began to blink.

The lamps.



When the emotions fell down, and not without the effort of the colorless came silence,

The same quiet man stood up:

- Boris Andreevich, - he turned to the hero, - I would not have been in your place

To argue with Matt, it is an unworthy educated person and not good at all.

I would open the door and give Vasily Gavrilovich something, for example.

A bottle of champagne on the head. Then I would regret it.



The audience was a little confused, then fluid applause was spread. all

They got up and went out. The men approached the magician and complained to him.

The hands, the women deliberately embarrassed bumped into the unridden cheeks. I asked the

A beautiful girl who happened to be with me:

Who is this quiet man?

She looked at me astonished:

Do you not know? Academic Suvorov, a mathematician I am his graduate student.

An unusual man. I said the first thing that came to my mind, but quickly.

He thought and continued, - Maybe you can tell me more about him, and I

Should I write a sketch in my newspaper?

She thought and suddenly suggested:

“Come to me, I have tea, Krasnodar. You will drink, and

I will tell.

As usual, he pulled me for the tongue.

What about champagne and candy?

- Don't worry, until champagne and candy business today, I hope not

I heard the answer and realized that the conversation would be long.



But this is a completely different story.



by Abrp722

http://world.lib.ru/b/b_a/

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №6354
 04.06.2008
The main problem for the Russian football team is that

The winner of the European Championship is not determined by SMS vote.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №6353
 04.06.2008
<Kolpak> there are medical castes
<Collapse> 0.5 kg, wrapped with soft, gripable rubber
<Kolpak> crazy people
<Yoj> I’m not even going to ask you where you know this.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №6352
 04.06.2008
<xxx>: I, of course, understand everything, but when she wrapped my pussy in a cloth and called it granddaughter...

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №6351
 04.06.2008
Interesting, am I doing that? When I turn off the computer, I have time to wake up and quickly go to bed until the monitor is turned off so that the light is?

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №6350
 03.06.2008
Status in ASK:
Once in a while, sausage!
Experiment of the century. Sweetened sausages in mustard!
16:46 mixed mustard and water
16:47 He threw the sauce
16:49 added a spice
16:50 hurt
16:53 What is it? O_O
16:55 The saucers finally broke up.
16:57 hm, cabbage of colour
16:58 shame at neighbors to raise the cover to mix
17:01 Neighbors somehow strangely touch me, in the kitchen tears eyes from the mushrooms in the air
17:03 I pretend everything is fine.
17:04 swept the sausage cough through the dumb snack, roasted
17:08 cooking of pasta

17:15 Pasta by float! Food of Godfather!

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №6349
 03.06.2008
When brother Monica was bought, he burned his old one.They jumped into the car at half nine in the evening. In general, I broke into the sanary at 20:50 (he until 21:00), opened the door from the foot, I was a guard, I was to him - the manager to me and the cashier tell me if the box will be removed - I will kill!
The security guard rattled and fled to the box office, after 30 seconds the manager ran... at 20:55 we went out with Monica. The service!

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №6348
 03.06.2008
I talked to a friend of my childhood who I rarely see.

I: We behave wrong, we need to see more often.
When I was a child, I picked up the dishes, the machines and went to visit.
He: Yes, we need to fix it. As soon as summer!
I: Then so is it! I take the dishwasher, Igor’s machine and come to you 😉

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №6347
 03.06.2008
1st Ladenko – Masha and I are watching Kruger.

2. and that there is no time for brother.

1st I am naked in front of the computer.

You look at the crocker. Croucher is your shit.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №6346
 03.06.2008
I’m mad I’m mad I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it I need it
Don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid. :)

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №6345
 03.06.2008
A lot of girls were driving. All the girlfriends say, "the man behind the wheel-the monkey with a grenade" is a stereotype, and recently I became a witness to such a story.
The pedestrian transition. The light. It burns red. There is a jeep, behind it a jeep. Here the careless child runs out on the road, the toyota brakes sharply, the jeep also tries, but has little time and touches a little with the toyota.
A round man rolls out of his eyebrow, scratches his neck, looks almost scratched, and the darkness on his face turns into a good-hearted smile. At this time the Jeep is trembling, a shocked girl blinks, looks, shakes, tries to pick up the phone number with trembling fingers and, crying, with a shocked voice says-"Dear...I...FALL IN A CAR ACCIDENT...

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №6344
 03.06.2008
by 111
I think I think it’s like shit TV. The new reality show HOM-2. Build your love, praeactive

by 222
or at the time)
The Parasha. Show from the area

by 111
Let them fuck with Andrei Balobovov

by 222
Erotic Series of Sex

by 111
Field of Miracles - an old rookie collects parvovozes and wrapped shells, and the winner - AAUTOMOBIL PYHAZ!

by 222
stars in the area. Shura, Penkin, the Beast and the Moses have already given their consent.

by 111
Transfer to Fort Boyar. The participants are left alone in the fortress with the angry Boyarski.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna