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[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №131482
 30.07.2016
Difficult for fathers. Watch what the son downloads from the internet and the daughter publishes...

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №131481
 30.07.2016
The boys of eleven and three years of age crack more than us and our husband.
— — —
It is normal in the animal that in the human world. We also have a five-year-old boy who eats more than my wife and I together, weighing 110kg, and he is very thin but wildly active.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №131480
 30.07.2016
Later I realized that this was the basic principle of our society, “who is weaker, is right.” If in the sandbox, Masha took away Vanie's cushion, Vanya took him back, and Masha cried - it means that Masha is good, she is sunny and a victim, and Vanya is a bad hooligan, because of him the girl is crying. He works everywhere. No matter what happened, the main thing is to cry first.

Not at all. not always. There are often situations when Masha came up with a socket, Vanya picked out, Masha cried, and she is also blasphemed that she is a rude selfish and can't share. Plateau as well.
In order not to incite an intersex dispute, I will emphasize in particular: if Vanya came with a socket and cried when she picked Masha, he can easily be blamed for the same.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №131479
 30.07.2016
My friend’s grandfather died of a heart attack when he was 70. It seems nothing unusual, many so die, but he died from deep spiritual experiences. In the early 2000s he accumulated a normal amount of money. He turned them, wrapped them in gasoline, and then placed them in a three-litre glass bowl. He closed it with an ordinary polyethylene cover and placed this wealth in the basement, further behind the other banks with salts.

At various meetings, drinks and other people's gatherings, the question "Where is the money?" He replied that he was in a reliable bank (the rumors that he had accumulated a normal amount apparently reached relatives in the 12th knee).

It has been a few months, and maybe years. Nobody knows the exact numbers. Dad decided to check his ass. He was surprised when he saw an empty bowl. The cover was ripped, there was no trace of the marble, and money was only demanded. Yes, there were mice. My grandfather died in the cemetery.

Moral: the bank had to be rolled with a metal cover. Although.. Mice may have bitten her too.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №131478
 30.07.2016
As a child, my brother and I spent the summer in the village. And one day they hurt, blamed before the grandfather, which he said to the cattle in his hearts.

Early in the morning of the next day, through a dream, we hear a large truck coming in and the voice, "We are behind cattle!"

Sleep as it did not happen, we flew to grandfather with the screams "Daddy don't give us, we will not hollow again!!"

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №131477
 30.07.2016
XX - a girl writing from a train

XX: I have a cake
XX: Cognac would be poured into pepsi, but the people will not understand
XY: Why will people not understand? The grandmother alone?
XX is no. the men. I’ll take more ?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №131476
 30.07.2016
You are fucking foolish:

Fuck, I am a handjob.
WOW : WOW?
Yesterday I made a shelf for the bathroom, sprinkled along with a table. Then I went out to eat and poured out boiling water. He began to shake the loaf, slipped, swallowed. In the evening, the wife told the little one to talk in a male language, he broke out, the belt slipped and I was right on my leg. It hurts to tears. (

Wouldn’t the child have tears? No, well - you felt like a child, and even this did not awaken a drop of empathy in you. Talking in a man? This is not masculine, it is foolish. Manly and humanly, it would be words through the mouth. You are not a man, but a shameful link, since with the weak and dependent on you you can only talk with puzzles. You shouldn’t have multiplied, oh it wasn’t worth it.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №131475
 30.07.2016
We once witnessed a street quarrel in St. Petersburg between two women of the age, they were so beautifully quarreled, without matte, but with fantasy, I thought, only in movies or books it happens. Something like the "Nomenclature underwear!", and there was so much dignity in each.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №131474
 30.07.2016
Today my sister was called with an offer to replace her windows. She said she lived in a rental apartment, and she was answered, "No problem, you can take the windows with you when you move."

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №131473
 30.07.2016
Fuck, I am a handjob.
WOW : WOW?
Yesterday I made a shelf for the bathroom, sprinkled along with a table. Then I went out to eat and poured out boiling water. He began to shake the loaf, slipped, swallowed. In the evening, the wife told the little one to talk in a male language, he broke out, the belt slipped and I was right on my leg. It hurts to tears. (
Fuck you X)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №131472
 30.07.2016
Listened on the street:

She is Lenin's counterpart.
A fellow Lenin? O. How old is she?
– 32
In the sense...? When was Lenin born?
What about Lenin? Fuck, she’s like Lena, my sister!! to

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №131471
 30.07.2016
My mom in the country in the heat loves to drink a glass of cold beer "Zvanetsky goose", as she calls it.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №131470
 30.07.2016
My sister was invited to bring me. I write sms:
Hi to you. When will it be more convenient to take a soul?
and Dasha

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №131469
 30.07.2016
In school we had a cool body, normal, could and stretched, and pressed, and ran with us. Once he offered to play volleyball, he was alone against all the guys in the class (seemingly in the 7th or 8th we were then studying).

We play, we are 9 people, a physician one, but leads with a score of 10: 2, we played frankly badly and we were already desperate, as another physician enters the hall, he was a canonical representative of the profession (drunk, led a little like a sports lifestyle).

He goes into the gym and says, Oh, Sanya (the first body name was Alexander Nikolaevich), I will help you and get with him into one part of the field. I have to say, I, and my classmates then fell, so we lost, and the second came, but he just saved us, in 10 minutes he had time to melt the game, completely)) we won with the count 13: 15 then

But the funniest thing that played is the dispute, who lost - the one is pushed off the floor 30 times, then the second body of himself and punished.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №131468
 30.07.2016
Do men need to be able to dance?

///////////////////////////////////////

I went to dance classes. First the valse, then the tango.
My daughter is getting married in three months. I know the handshake very well.)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №131467
 30.07.2016
About the submission.

There was a case in studenthood – I got a look of an absolutely gentle, I would say, ephemeral creation. Just a fairy. And then just in the shelter with us in the room no one - the boys went away. I pull the fairy to see my collection of brands ;), I offer to eat what B-G sent and I offer the lady to shake a little vodka (go! There is money!) In the ghost. She says she doesn’t like bubbles and shyly moves the glass (a little bit). I pour, and she just as shy little holds the throat of the bottle until the vessel is filled to about 120-130 milliliters.

And here I, my dear ones, understood that I will not be able to intoxicate this heavenly creature, but sex will be. I’m not going to fuck you, but rather me.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №131466
 30.07.2016
Life is fair as long as we are lucky. Justice is looking for losers.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №131465
 30.07.2016
More than a hundred years ago in St. Petersburg there was a unique restaurant. It was famous for the absence of quarrels, scandals or debuts, which were usually arranged by the crowd.

The fact is that all the servicing staff of this restaurant, from the cook to the wardrobe, passed the compulsory examination "to take a drunk." The owner of the institution, Porfiry Filimonovich, personally arranged a check for those who wanted to "service" him, which was not all. But if it was lucky to get a job from him, the master paid generously and treated with respect. The test was that, possessing an extraordinary strength and a very impressive figure, Porfiry Filimonovich did not without pleasure begin to "walk the wheel" throughout the restaurant, to squeeze the furniture and for the most persuasive to shout out that he at one time "and on the bear."
The task of the examined was not to be frightened and to try to calm the upset employer. Few good guys managed to take off their legs without special injuries, and even more to cope with the "deboshir".

One day, in search of a place of a waitress, one young man of a “stumpy student appearance” came to such an examination. At first, Filimonich did not want to spend time on him, but he insisted. He looked closely at the newcomer, as the owner “blasphemed”, took off his glasses and, in the eyes of the present, in a few seconds pulled off the shirt, pulled through the sleeves the shell, jumped out to meet Filimonich, with a short masterpiece struck him on the ear. And while he was standing, stunned and stunned by surprise, he quickly stretched his rope behind him forward and cleverly wrapped his hands to the body with a shirt. Then, after thinking for a moment, the "student" as quickly turned the clap from two towels and, without ceremony, pushed it into the mouth of the unhappy examiner. After such shocks, Porfiry Filimonovich had to spend a couple of days in bed, as he had somehow broken two ribs. The "Arkaška-student" did not get offended and worked for himself, but first found out where that "so shaky came out." It turned out, several years before this Arkady Rybin worked as a sanitary in a house for the minded and was forced there to cope with more serious opponents than Porfiry Filimonovich.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №131464
 30.07.2016
A rich man invited Aristipe to teach his son. The philosopher asked for a fairly substantial amount of education, and the rich man stood upright and said that for such money you can buy an ass.
“Well, buy,” said the philosopher, “you will have two donkeys.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №131463
 30.07.2016
The central bank reports.

A new banknote with the denomination of 2000r is introduced.
Banknote of Vladivostok.

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