bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №17761
 03.07.2009
The liver has a good memory.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №17760
 03.07.2009
The power of self-induction. I tell my father’s words. There was an old woman in
The Basque Village. It was only after the war. Grandmother
She was lonely - her husband died in Finnish, and three sons were domestic.
I cleaned. Once the old lady got sick - the head is broken, bones
Laminate and heat. Nothing to do, go to the neighboring village where it was.
Sanchez (need to add that in her years she never went to doctors in
Life was not going. It was a long time, but to the grandmother's sandwich came.
He enters the cellar, and there the corridor is full of battles with the same pain. by
The nurse walks in the corridor, the thermometers puts the forearm in for everyone.
Accelerate the reception of patients. He got the thermometer and the old lady.
She sat down, felt better, and came back.
Home, the same ten kilometers with more feet to cross.
The nurse did not count a thermometer in the evening, but nothing terrible
It did not happen, it was written. The fun began a year later, when the grandmother again
appeared in the sandwiches and began to demand a magical glass stick,
The old broke up and now it is quite trouble - the health has gone badly.
The doctors began to understand: it turns out as soon as the grandmother fails -
immediately thermometer underarm and in five minutes again healthy. Where did she
He only measured the temperature. They were advised between
The doctors decided: once it helps, it must be given. It was delivered from stocks.
The truth on another day about this story in the fifty-kilometre district
Every dog in the village knew.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №17759
 03.07.2009
Today, the State Duma discussed the law on pedophiles and homosexuals.
Why are they not ashamed? They are constantly cooking for themselves. When are they
People will remember?

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №17758
 03.07.2009
DJ: I sit in the military committee, I go through the honey commission.
Thro the building, the light is cut off, even though the eyes are blurred.
and silence.
In the midst of the evil darkness of the military committee, someone's subtle nervous voice is heard:
"Let us run, let us run!and "
We got...

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №17757
 03.07.2009
From the Foreign Forum:

Once I saw certified copies of the contract with the Chinese, more precisely - translations into Russian, Chinese, English... so there in the Russian version by the Chinese in the point about force majeure was listed among the circumstances of force majeure: somehow war, earthquake floods... and in the end "... and every other PIZIDEZA...
He understood us absolutely...

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №17756
 03.07.2009
And no one comes to the mind that if a girl goes on the street with something big, heavy, uncomfortable to carry, she should offer help, and not try to cleverly get up?

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №17755
 03.07.2009
Kernel (17:42:09 29/06/2009)
My daughter is pregnant.
Jul`Ka (17:42:26 29/06/2009)
Congratulations to :)
Kernel (17:42:37 29/06/2009)
# # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #
Jul`Ka (17:42:57 29/06/2009)
Congratulations twice :)

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №17754
 03.07.2009
Tagged Liquid
____________________________________________________________
...
Fuega: I’ve been playing the piano for five years, and I don’t know why the left pedal. There are three in the piano.
zooleen: It is gas, grip and brake.
zooleen: to chase.
____________________________________________________________
I played for 14 years. I didn’t even know about the left pedal. Thank you for pushing ?
So, on the piano: right - the forte pedal (allows to resonate all strings at once, due to which the sound becomes louder and, if the pedal is used incorrectly, more dirty). The left pedal - una corda, moves the hammer so that they do not hit the straps (as happens in the usual mode), but only two, forcing the free third to resonate. The sound is cleaner and quieter.
The middle pedal (especially for the piano) - pianissimo, moves the panel with a thin loop so that it is the same string and hammer. The sound is very quiet. (Of course, a useful thing to not annoy the neighbors)))
The piano is a bit different. But after that (if anyone is interested) - in Google)
Thanks for attention.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №17753
 03.07.2009
Russian Man: Yesterday the motorcycle sold, a cracked clove! I bought it for 8, sold it for 15.
What is tuning?
Russian Man: No, washed, loha found

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №17752
 03.07.2009
"... I want to look at the map of the e95..."

No more this road, man. Bring it to the top, or a man suffers :-)

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №17751
 03.07.2009
Remove the floor of the line and re-print it.

by Zeno. I am busy!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! to
He fled in hysteria.

[ + 59 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №17750
 03.07.2009
by Mordor:
Frog, I sold 2 liters of juice, which today is a year old! Happy Birthday Fuck!! to

[ + 96 - ] Comment quote №17749
 02.07.2009
I killed my cat today. She was 14 years old.
I slept on the system.
Remember who is not difficult.

[ + 140 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №17748
 02.07.2009
Unrespected smokers!
How tired of breathing the "smell" of your cigarettes! It is everywhere: on the streets, in restaurants, in clubs, in public transportation, where almost all drivers smoke, even in playgrounds where teenagers and parents of young children smoke. Nothing from him, shit, do not go! And also you are dissatisfied with the fact that your rights are violated by prohibiting you from smoking in public places. Has anyone thought about non-smokers?? to
Fuck that no one is fooled.

[ + 31 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №17747
 02.07.2009
The cry of a tormented soul and a woman has been a month of untouched body. by Koala! by Ilmarinen! Melt... As long as you are there in feelings and decide something, I will be hanged up! Well, I can’t really do that anymore... I’m going to hit people soon!!! Fuck, let’s make it easier. Let us do something! If you are reading this, write me!

People, bring somewhere butterfly... My strength is not there =( Let it see, but...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №17746
 02.07.2009
Kirill Ivancov: Well, I made a beautiful offer to my wife! Dinner in the mountains, flowers, a romantic ring with diamonds...

Watson: You are a fool!

Kirill Ivancov: Why not?

Vasya Pohrenov: I made my offer cheap and no less angry! When she sits in her bed on a warm winter evening, I hear the end coming louder and all that, I stop sharply and say: - Marry me! She cried out, “Damn, just don’t stop!”

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №17745
 02.07.2009
He discovered that Google doesn’t know the word “clitormouse” at all (just like clitormouse).

Meanwhile, it is so informally called a cursor control device on laptops such as ThinkPad (officially called a trackpoint). A red button in the middle of the keyboard. In the Aitishnikov circles, this word has been in use for more than 10 years. And it was invented by me in the "Computer" no one other than Tola Wassermann.

I don’t understand one thing – he’s a hater. How did he know about the clitoris?

Onotole invented a word that Google doesn’t know!

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №17744
 02.07.2009
There is no more joyful spectacle than the look of a pre-Festival refrigerator!!! to

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №17743
 02.07.2009
<Papa> Tanya, do you know what stress is?What is measured?? to
<Tanya> No, it’s when it’s hard on the soul, all on the nerves...

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №17742
 02.07.2009
She is a low woman!
You are a man xD

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna