We have a coffee machine at work: you throw a slice, press a button – and here you have a soluble coffee in a plastic cup. Serving this machine stupidly, colleagues constantly complain that the machine will not pour water, then the coffee will not fill. I fit: the machine, as usual, spills coffee, pouches boiling water, throws a spoon, and everything seems to be fine, but without a glass.

When I went to work at the psychological center, I hoped to deal with the cockroaches in my head.
Now, after a year of work, the feeling that each of them got a good education and can now argue to defend themselves.)

XXX: How was the day?

YYY: I was lying on the couch. Then tired and slept.

Quotes from Films
The same Munich.

A man destroyed a family, expelled a wife with a child from the house!
What a child! I am an officer!
He drove out his wife with an officer.

Truth is what is now considered truth.

They say that humor is useful. A joke, life is prolonged.
Not all of them. To him who laughs, it extends, and to him who sharps, it shortens.

Germany's national team will receive in revenge as a gift of Lada-Kalina.

A familiar driver told me. Further from his words.
I go on the prospect. I turn at the crossroads. And suddenly the DPSnik runs out, with the sticks of his machete, the brakes.
D is the driver; B is the driver.
D: are we breaking?
Q: What are we breaking? Where is?
Q: Did you not see the sign?
Q: What is another sign?
D: There is a sign hanging “Floating to the left is prohibited!”
A: So what then? This sign does not prohibit the twist.
D: You know what it means? and ride.

- A strike of an adult electric acne can stumble a horse.
A horse and a drop of nicotine kill.
And really. An inanimate beast.

First there were steam ships, then steam ships, and now here, have lived to walking ships.

XH: Like a girl I want to spit you
You can be like a boy.
Oh no, not the oxygen. Could you go out with a guy?
YY: Is it a fool for you?
and cpasibo. I always believed in you.

"Russian took second place in the world championship in the game of imaginary guitar".

As a reward, he will receive keys from an imaginary car.

Answer with a quote:

And now tell me, are you using the words “Good People” all the time? Are you all so called?

“All,” replied the prisoner, “there are no evil people in the world.”

÷÷ and

A good rat man?
Yes, just other good people ruined him.
Am I a good person?
And you...
50 strikes with a stick!
“Thank you, dear leader...Igemon...

XX: I wanted to tell you for a long time, I’m tired of you repeating it all the time. Could you be a smarter pope?
A smarter pope?

Fuck, the wind is noble outside the window — and it’s as if someone is playing a term-vox loudly.
For an hour, I have been suffering from incomprehensible feelings - whether I want to cry, whether I want to cry, or if I want to go for beer.

My birthday is two days of drunkenness. I thought it was too late and I had to go to bed. Just add to the bed, there is a VK alert on the phone, an application to add to friends. I open and see the inscription: "Alcohol wants to be your friend 24 hours a day"... Really thought whitebox came...

Day of Russian Cinema
Read funny quotes from movies.

Rochefort, close out of all French ports.
And the entrances, Monsignor?
It is genius.

Dictator’s reserve on the ipodrome. He announces the name of the Joker and the name of the horse.

The name of the horse is Self (with the emphasis on the first slang).
And the dictator emphasized the second, and the whole field sounds:

Jokey Ivanov is on his own.

Video: South Korean or North Korean?
South of course. Where is the phone with the camera?

I’m not against women in burkini on the beach. But I am against their men there. I do not know why.

I went to visit my neighbors in Dacia. We sat down at the table, laid a shale, eaten. Suddenly a voice from the back:
We have eaten, and you have just stopped.
With a little hurry, I ask:
Uncle, are you me?
He was talking to his cat.

Written by DMS. The contract states that "in the event of an insurance incident the owner must contact the 24-hour dispatcher service".
Oh well ok.
Insurance has arrived. I call.
"Hello to you! Called in non-working hours. Leave a message after the signal..."

C - Service