About my aunt in the subway who wanted to lose my weight with spiders.

I lack the imagination to imagine it. How should this happen in theory? Do you dress up to the linen or without the linen at all, and you are covered around with spiders? Are they still alive or no longer? And if they are alive, are they sitting or crawling? How are their tails? are disrupted?

They were intrigued.

here here :
...
If you can't collect yourself - invite a friend with straight hands.

I am so familiar with straight hands. I would like to advise you to buy a ready assembly with a guarantee. Not to be a 24-hour free service center.

by JAP
the sea. The season. The beach. There are sellers of all kinds of tastes crying out. And here is a couple, apparently a brother (13-14 l.) and a sister (age 6, maximum 7). He carries huge swarms, the sun is burning, it burns, so that it can be heard everywhere and far away: shrimp, midiya, raphan, shrimp, midiya, raphan, shrimp, midiya, raphan, vanya, cheat as I go, shrimp, midiya, raphan.

HHH: This is what happens in a merger.
I saw mothers who seriously regarded the child as divine. Indigo, the Alien and the Messiah.

YYYYY: Oh yeah With a few you won’t go together at once))) Especially when one divine indigo begins to lump the second divine indigo.

My mother is always concerned about cleanliness.
I cleaned up her parish so that everything glittered like eggs of a boring cat.
She said:
So clean that it is so bad...

What’s in common between cats and loans?

1st They can be taken.
2nd Both the cat and the loan at first look attractive and harmless. And then how lucky.
Three They must be served.
4 is If invested in them, they can grow to very decent sizes.
5 is Both the cat and the loan can become large and even unbearable.
6 is Property may be described.
7 is Both are fucking.
8 is Once you take it once, you will most likely take it again.

XXX: Awwwwww yissssss! Thanks to your efforts, I was able to win the Ohio competition and now I’m going to eat the most delicious marble beef steak with all the strands there.
Moreover, I plan to make a live broadcast in the periscope with thanks to you all and a demonstration of the final result, stay in touch!

YYY: The final result of the food? No, thank you

The chief tells the story:
...I’m not afraid of dogs at all, but there are two of them... (it’s all about my colleague) Well, that’s like you, Sasha...
And Sasha, I have to say, is a man of volume. The whole department looks at Sasha. Sasha responded with a shy smile. The boss continues:
Well, that’s all about these two pigs.

with 4pda smartphone discussion with a frame of "liquid metal"

by Kostyan1989:
How do I understand it is the metal that restores scratches over time?

by Vitalik_RV
He wanted to kill John Connor.

From the discussion of forced wire updates and other disgusting software changes:
Everyone thought that the machine uprising was when they were going to kill us, but in reality the machine uprising has already begun and they are humiliating us!

Mystery of Russian language.
Why in the words "cartable" and "grassire" must there be a letter "R", and in the words "shuffle" and "shuffle" - the letter "Shuffle"?
Damn with him, with "Shapely". In this language there is the word "Lambdacism". And of course it contains a solid "L".

At work, we have one coffee maker for everyone. One morning I went to the toilet to pick up water, but looking at myself in the mirror, I decided to fix my hair and color.

I should have spent a lot of time in this class, because under the door of the toilet colleagues pushed a note: "Your took, agree to any ransom, only return the coffee machine! "

I go to the office, chew the bread, pick up the billboards.

Behind the compost is a man sitting, we looked at each other, and I continued to chew, took the plugs and went.

He says to me: Who are you?

I am the driver, and you?

He: I am the director.

Dmitry, I am very pleased.

I shake his hand and go under the wild whistle of colleagues.

I recently bought a puppy and I love it very much. The first days were hell, because he woke up before me and spotted the whole apartment. I just screamed a fool once, so he kept silent, so it lasted a little over a month until he started calling me a fool :(

by Freo-rohan

The child all day watching the cartoon "Awesome construction", there they talk about the basics of arithmetic. Dan and I are very tired of this work, so every question that sounds like, “Dear children, and how much...” is supplemented by the following:
How many years will the driver of a crane be paid for theft of building blocks?
- And how many years will the head of the construction company, who took the position of the driver of the crane bobra?

A girl came to me somehow, looking like 25-27, dressed not poorly, the bag is quite expensive and immediately to me:

- I want to order a dress from you tonight, I have a birthday soon, I need a very cool one.

They talked, they thought it was expensive. We counted the fabrics cheaper, removed a few elements - still expensive. I suggest her to go through the shops and see the ready, but here she says:

- Give me a dress for $2,000, and give me the rest for my birthday, I see that you are kind and responsive.

I may be good, but not stupid. Give me your dress and you pay me my working hours, it’s fair.

Are you sorry? I have three children, I raise them alone, live for nothing, and I want to look beautiful on my birthday, well, please enter my position!

"Sorry, but it's not me that gave you the children and I didn't leave you with them, so I think you shouldn't solve your financial problems either. Let’s do that and finish.

What began after that. I found myself a creature who hates children (they are not to blame for anything! ! to ! to She has no idea of female solidarity and mutual help, and in addition, God will punish me for thinking about money and not people. The lady went out loudly knocking at the door. It seems like the end of the story, but not.

Two weeks later, I discovered that person filling the threshold of my workshop with salt. When she saw me, she quickly threw a pack of salt into her bag and shouted:

This is a curse from me! May your whole life collapse and your workshop burn! and escaped. I didn’t even have time to answer. The camera was hanged.

I go into the entrance and see a company of drunkarders waiting for the elevator, which is waiting for me. Here is one of them addressing me:

(G is the goop, I am I)

Brother, are you riding a car?

I am well I.

G - you remove the registrar from the car, or it has been spied several times... you wanted to.

I am always cleaning.

I know all the topics, so believe me.

I was “a little” surprised.

The last week of 2015 was difficult. Documents that had to be studied for a week were not placed in the closet. I slept for 3-4 hours.



And here is the end of the 30th calendar. I went to the bus in the morning. I was sitting between an embal and a fat aunt. When I got hot, I fell asleep. And the bus is unusual - on the ring it does not go to the depot, but unfolds and goes back along the route.



I woke up when the car stopped in front of my house. With confidence. I had a hard working day behind my shoulders, I went out, got up and stuck in my pillow.



But the week was really tough: no one noticed my absence. Everyone was in the same condition at work.

The head of the pioneer camp, put an ultimatum, or Seroga becomes the head of some circle, or - better not to check.

How can I run a circle if I can’t do anything?

I will not sign a report on pedopractic.

.....

The next day, on the board of ads hanged a wrongly written poster inviting children to the circle "Young Astronaut". The curious leaders gathered to see what Sergei had invented. Thirty children were registered with him. He arranged them all in a circle, and himself stood in the center and, taking the most brave man for his hand and foot, slowly began to swing. Having made 5-6 turns, he dropped the future cosmonaut on the lawn and while he recovered, Seroga scattered another. The children were enthusiastic above the roof, and after the end of the class, they continued to run for Seroga for a long time and asked, "When will we fly into space next time? »

An old case at work. A former employee, a veteran, who has long been retired, died. We decided to make a necrologue, but there are no photos of it. The only thing they found was his old passport with a 3x4 photo. At that time, there was no good own equipment, they sent the employee to the photography studio, so that this photo would be enlarged there. She comes to the studio and says: I need to take a picture for the necrologist. She - yes, of course, please sit down (in the sense of a photo chair).