Today the number was...
I am standing at the bus stop... suddenly from behind the stops there appears a kind of crazy cat, goes out to the middle of the bus lane... and dumbly starts to rot in the middle of the road... the stop has already begun to lie...
But a half-minute later the bus arrives - the cat remains in place... but the eyes change in the size of twice... as if a whole bus entered his personal toilet...

Rin: At the subway another flyer distributor slipped. About something disagreeed, advertised a new office store.
Rin: Impressed approach to the topic. “You’re young, but already know the price of freedom? Do you hate being thrown into a frame? Do you want to finally get a walk? only we - common notebooks _without fields_ from nine rubles fifty copies!" :D

The monument to the Ukrainian fleet is the legendary submarine Zaporozhye. In order not to drown, she was cooked to the pierce.

In response to:

1st :
Unbelievable, but the fact: after a beer came home and immediately three robes in a row with a windsor tied.
1st :
Three hours ago I tried to learn and failed.
2nd :
Then he tied a blanket, blanket, shirt and crane in the bathroom.

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Bender is you? O_O

(K) of

The rector cut out the inets in the entire student community.
All the students were drunk.

I work in a small organization, I wrote a software that automates a lot of routine office work. I put a trial for 5 days and show the boss, with a hint that I should buy.
-After an hour calls to myself and says that if I don't find a crack, I will be fired :(

I sit with my wife in the kitchen and eat shurma.
A cat comes, begins to rub his legs, to ask.
Wife: "My brother was stunned. I have come out"

At the mine, at one of the passers during lunch, a small rat sprinkled a sausage and began to run away, the one behind her, she in a cut tube about 1.5-2m long, and hid there. He didn’t think for long, but stopped both ends of the pipe and began to intense a squat from above. This action lasted about 5-7 minutes until colleagues got tired of this sound.
Watson, she died there a long time ago.
Vasya made a checking blow to the pipe several times, and rested, opened the pipe and looked there. Basil laughed and said:
- Fuck men, don't believe, she has her back legs clogged her ears, and she eats the sausage with the front legs.

(C)dr.5y51em

Girls dress brightly and outspoken only to play the male instinct to fuck out all the unusual and amazing.

I am studying in Jurfake.
I approach the bus stop. People are full as usual. Comrade calls, everyone around hears only my answers, naturally:
Q: Are you going to class today?
I am UGU. What do we have today?
T is a seminar. Prepare for rape.
One rape and all.
T: Yes, only one couple today.
Take my place, I’ll be soon.

and WOFFKAA:
I am Arbitration.
And when I finish the arbitration, we need to repair our apartment.
The door was opened on Saturday.

The smoke:
If you are a wizard, I also want a door on Saturday, but rather a door on Friday night.

Today I was at a congress of amateur photographers, I heard the outcry of a dialogue after which I just couldn’t stand more normally:
Can you distinguish color from black and white?
Surprisingly, the eyes are different!! to
Furthermore, he heard the toppling of the legs, the silenced matts and the phrases:
A zebra in the snow!! to

In our country, fucking dogs cross the pedestrian crossings, and especially smart on the green light, when will pedestrians learn to do so?

xxx> I'm fucking with the female logic. First they look for a unique creative personality, and then for several years they try to make him live a "normal" life.
Either they are looking for a man after whom they would be like behind a stone wall, and then wonder he restricts them.
Wow> Well the walls are actually the limiters :)
xxx> Or constantly divorce a man for money and then get upset that he treats them as things.
But the fucking thing - they are looking for an experienced man, that is, one who would sleep before them with a lot of babes, and then they want him not to cheat them, like a gourmand able to distinguish the taste of dozens of dishes can be kept constantly feeding a ham.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Fuck, this is the story.
I met with a girl... there was no sex for a very long time... probably 8 months... but I loved her, I forgave a lot... I didn't think of her at all.

And finally the celebration of all Russia and my friend) a miracle of miracles happened)))

First time with her.

Everything is normal... but I look at it later... after all, she’s so sad. I’m asking her (maybe I didn’t like it or even... I’m feeling damn) dear, isn’t it? Why are you so sad?
No, it is okay. I just feel like you are dating me for sex.

The curtain.

The door of the car begins to close, and I shout “Allahu Akbar!” and throw a bag of old shoes into the closing door.
Of course, I immediately fled. But the portion of a second I watched the expressions of the faces of people in the wagon was truly unforgettable! =) is
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Here you are Pidaras! People, if you see this Gandon, throw it down on the subway rails. Forget the fucking stuff in advance. You can break your legs, hands, and press the hook between the doors.
You’re a shit, you’re such a shit, you’re such a shit, you’re such a shit.

You put a great man on his knees, and he is still higher.

A new station was launched to clean the sewage sewage from the same that does not sink in the water. And at the exit, bricks should be obtained for burning at the heat station.
Who made such a joke is unknown. But when the tape was cut under the fanfares, a candy fell under the applause from the unit.

A man sits and looks at the flood. The hour sits, the other... At the third hour the wife goes into the bathroom:
Okay fuck you! Go fishing or I need to wash.

If Luke Besson lived in Russia, he would have directed the film "Route Taxi". and documentary.